Does anyone wear a suit at home these days?

Originally Posted by constant struggle

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you require someone to wear a cardigan or jacket in your house? thats ridiculous
He is just too cheap to heat the house. He does it for their own good.

That does seem a bit ridiculous, making someone take their jackets off or wear sweaters to "feel at ease." Maybe they'd be at ease if you just didnt think about it...unless you're home is a large estate that would be concurrent with the dress code requirements.

Originally Posted by constant struggle

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you require someone to wear a cardigan or jacket in your house? thats ridiculous

No, no, no. The cardigan is for me. I only offer it to other people if they have neglected to wear a jacket. I like people to be comfortable when they come to my home for dinner so if someone doesn't have a jacket, I offer them something to wear. Otherwise, they might feel embarrassed. Personally, I think it is a very warm touch and no one has ever acted offended.

Originally Posted by UTVol085

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That does seem a bit ridiculous, making someone take their jackets off or wear sweaters to "feel at ease." Maybe they'd be at ease if you just didnt think about it...unless you're home is a large estate that would be concurrent with the dress code requirements.

The reason I suggested everyone to "feel free to take off their jackets" is so the person who didn't have one and couldn't fit into the cardigan wouldn't feel uncomfortable and left out. If he could have fit into the cardigan I wouldn't have had to do this.

It is an act of kindness and hospitality.

Much like when someone knocks over a glass of red wine, and before they can apologize, you do the same with your glass and say "Ha, ha! This is such a shaky table, don't worry about it; it happens all the time." This is just good manners and about making people feel welcome.

Originally Posted by SoCal2NYC

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What a bunch of pricks. Never invite me to your houses.
Well, I wanted to see that Jil Sander suit in person, but if you won't wear it, what's the point?

Originally Posted by dopey

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No, no, no. The cardigan is for me. I only offer it to other people if they have neglected to wear a jacket. I like people to be comfortable when they come to my home for dinner so if someone doesn't have a jacket, I offer them something to wear. Otherwise, they might feel embarrassed. Personally, I think it is a very warm touch and no one has ever acted offended.




The reason I suggested everyone to "feel free to take off their jackets" is so the person who didn't have one and couldn't fit into the cardigan wouldn't feel uncomfortable and left out. If he could have fit into the cardigan I wouldn't have had to do this.

It is an act of kindness and hospitality.

Much like when someone knocks over a glass of red wine, and before they can apologize, you do the same with your glass and say "Ha, ha! This is such a shaky table, don't worry about it; it happens all the time." This is just good manners and about making people feel welcome.


Well, I wanted to see that Jil Sander suit in person, but if you won't wear it, what's the point?


I understand your point fully. For me, I change out of my nice clothes right when I get home. I'm not much of a cook and my fiance is usually at work during dinner time, so my dinner usually consists of buffalo wings or something of the microwavable sort. I'd rather not get buffalo wing sauce on my Oxxford fawnskin trousers. I'm very warm blooded so even in the winter I'll wear shorts around the house. It's quite embarassing when a friend or someone comes to the door, only to be greeted by me in cargo shorts and a tee shirt in February in Minnesota.

I think if someone felt out of place not wearing a jacket they would be the type of person to have worn a jacket in the 1st place.

Also, not sure how "comfortable" I would be having someone give me their clothes to wear in their hosue.

Originally Posted by SoCal2NYC

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. . .
Also, not sure how "comfortable" I would be having someone give me their clothes to wear in their hosue.
This is just bizarre. You would take their food, but refuse some clothes? I would be much more concerned about what I ingest than what I put on my back.

In any event, no one has ever refused the offer nor do I feel anyone was ever made uncomfortable. In truth, I would be offended if someone implied that I was dirty or had some communicable disease by refusing to accept a sweater generously offered.

I wear my suit pants through the evening but not the jacket. Lately I'm digging sweater vests so I'll put one of those on over my dress shirt. If I need to step out at some point during the evening I'll slip the jacket back on. However, I'm new to wearing suits and enjoy wearing them as much as possible so this may not last.

Originally Posted by dopey

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This is just bizarre. You would take their food, but refuse some clothes? I would be much more concerned about what I ingest than what I put on my back.

In any event, no one has ever refused the offer nor do I feel anyone was ever made uncomfortable. In truth, I would be offended if someone implied that I was dirty or had some communicable disease by refusing to accept a sweater generously offered.

There is a difference between being invited over with the intention of eating DINNER at someone's house and not also having to wear their clothes because what you decided to wear was not up to par with the host.

Does your wife also offer her dresses, heels and jewelry to the wives who show up not to her standard?

Originally Posted by dopey

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This is just bizarre. You would take their food, but refuse some clothes? I would be much more concerned about what I ingest than what I put on my back. In any event, no one has ever refused the offer nor do I feel anyone was ever made uncomfortable. In truth, I would be offended if someone implied that I was dirty or had some communicable disease by refusing to accept a sweater generously offered.
Wait, what? No one was ever made uncomfortable by wearing your clothes but if they refused you would feel insulted. To me it looks like they'd accept it whether or not they were comfortable to avoid offending their host.

Originally Posted by SoCal2NYC

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What a bunch of pricks. Never invite me to your houses.
1+ Sounds pretty aristocratic (in the elitist sense) to me. Not saying that's a bad thing, I have my own expectations. I mean, I expect people to come to my house wearing pants. If they did not, I would lend them a pair if they fit. Or a towel. But I don't think this is really the same thing.

If I get home and my gf has made dinner and it's ready to eat right then, I usually take off only my jacket. If it's something potentially disastrous, like a messy pasta sauce, I change completely. Sometimes it's nice to have dinner with only the two of us at home, dressed well just for each other.

Originally Posted by Dopey

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Nor do I make the guest feel at ease.

I think this is a typo and might be leading to some confusion.

I like the idea of dressing for dinner. That should including insisting that any family member present themselves reasonably dressed to the dinner table. I often keep my coat and tie on until retiring after dinner. I have received guests to dinner wearing a white dinner jacket at home as well.

I would not rail at guests for how they dress however.

Originally Posted by SoCal2NYC

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There is a difference between being invited over with the intention of eating DINNER at someone's house and not also having to wear their clothes because what you decided to wear was not up to par with the host.

Does your wife also offer her dresses, heels and jewelry to the wives who show up not to her standard?

She has offered dresses to both woman and men, depending on their preferences. Really, everyone is made to feel welcome.

I think its fairly interesting to see that many of you well-dressed people would wear sweatpants and a t-shirt once at home.

Not to put anyone down but to me it's a question of self-respect to wear something I could welcome guests in or run some errands outside the house in.
I can see someone wearing khakis, cords or jeans at home, but sweatpants or a PJ?

Then again I'm a college student so I don't have to wear suit and tie every day. But if the clothes are well fitted and you're not doing anything like cooking you shouldn't have to immediately tear your clothes when you come home. That of course if just my humble opinion.

Originally Posted by dopey

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Nor do I make the guest feel at ease.

Originally Posted by TheIdler

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I think this is a typo and might be leading to some confusion.
As it turns out, it was a typo, which I have corrected, thank you. Perhaps it happened because I hadn't yet decided which way to go with this thread.