Baptism dilemma

[Teacher]

To all those who say "don't do it:" can you think of a practical downside? I can't.

 

[aphextwin07]

I was baptized but ofc grew up to realize I didn't care much for religion. I think my father has the same outlook but had it done in my case at his parent's behest, much like your situation. I really don't see anything wrong or hypocritical in doing so.

 

[globetrotter]

Originally Posted by StephenHero

I would do it in case your kid becomes religious. If he doesn't , it will simply be a symbolic gesture that he can ignore. But if he does, it would probably be good for him to have that status so he isn't forced to go through it formally at some strange age.

+1

I didn't have to deal with it, but had to circumcise my son. basically, my wife and I are jews who don't believe. but we decided to do it so that our son would have the option of being part of the jewish people if he wanted to. it will make your parents happy, it doesn't hurt or do any damage, I'd do it.

 

[stewartu]

I was faced with this decision with my first child about 17 years ago. I went forward with the baptism and have regretted it ever since. Keep in mind that you will be verbalizing your commitment to raise the child to believe in god and all of the dogma of whichever church you select. I was and continue to be a skeptic, and i am still ashamed of my hipocracy.

I did it for the sense of ceremony and to make the grandparents feel good. Wrong move. I dont think that it had any real meaning to them and i know that it had/has no meaning to me or to my daughter.

Again, i regret having done it. We did not have our second child baptised.

 

[Joffrey]

Baptize the kid and get it over with. Doesn't take much time and it'll get people off your backs

 

[acidboy]

he might be the next pope y'know!

j/k... I'm the type that would accommodate my folks to a certain degree, and this doesn't in any way put harm on your kid so I'd go for it.

btw, congratulations on your new baby.

 

[LatinStyleLover]

A slightly different perspective here on what is going on with your parents. For your Roman Catholic parents, it is much more than being baptized into the church that is on their minds. Catholic doctrine teaches that children are born with "original sin" and are therefore condemned without baptism. Whether your children ever attend church, whatever decision they might make in the future to either practice a particular faith, or not, per Catholic doctrine being baptized wipes out original sin and I can assure you that is what is bothering your parents, not whether or not they are ultimately going to be active Catholics.

If yo have no serious or particular objections to baptism, and your discussing it here seems to indicate that, then it seems to me that you will greatly relieve the real concern your parents have for your childs salvation without any downside. Whatever else might happen in the future, in your parents mind the original sin will be washed away and their grandchild not condemned.

My father experienced this same issue with my grandparents, as my dad was raised a strict Catholic, but since we were being raised a different faith my father would not baptize us until we reached the "age of consent." Each time one of my brothers or sister was finally baptized then my grandparents were so relieved. Apparently, they believe that any baptism, in any church, will wipe away original sin. I really do not know if the Catholic church teaches that, but my gramps sure believed it.

 

[dcg]

^ Yeah. Having been raised Catholic and hearing this sort of thing is one of the reasons I am so anti-religion.

 

[Joffrey]

Originally Posted by LatinStyleLover

A slightly different perspective here on what is going on with your parents. For your Roman Catholic parents, it is much more than being baptized into the church that is on their minds. Catholic doctrine teaches that children are born with "original sin" and are therefore condemned without baptism. Whether your children ever attend church, whatever decision they might make in the future to either practice a particular faith, or not, per Catholic doctrine being baptized wipes out original sin and I can assure you that is what is bothering your parents, not whether or not they are ultimately going to be active Catholics.

If yo have no serious or particular objections to baptism, and your discussing it here seems to indicate that, then it seems to me that you will greatly relieve the real concern your parents have for your childs salvation without any downside. Whatever else might happen in the future, in your parents mind the original sin will be washed away and their grandchild not condemned.

My father experienced this same issue with my grandparents, as my dad was raised a strict Catholic, but since we were being raised a different faith my father would not baptize us until we reached the "age of consent." Each time one of my brothers or sister was finally baptized then my grandparents were so relieved. Apparently, they believe that any baptism, in any church, will wipe away original sin. I really do not know if the Catholic church teaches that, but my gramps sure believed it.

You should be happy to read this: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn...042800831.html

 

[Xiaogou]

Originally Posted by Teacher

I was in the same boat. I just went ahead and did it. Like you said, it appeases the more religious family members (not that that was a big concern for me) and it gives the child at least that much for the future.

OP, you were raised in the church and then made the choice to back away. Give your children the same opportunity. IMO, nothing bad can come from going to church. Also, later in life you might have a change of heart and want to get involved again. Don't regret not having your child baptized. Fwiw, i am Protestant and my wife Catholic. Our children are baptized. My parents were not happy b/c they don't believe a child is capable of sin. That is a story for another time.

 

[JustinW]

If you and your wife and considering baptizing, I'd talk to some priests. Be honest, explain that neither of you are big on religion but you wish to have your child baptized to keep the grandparents happy. Have a look at the services offered by the churches you mentioned - when you remove the faith component of the service, sometimes you'll see an affirmation of community and family making a pact to care and love the child.

My wife and I come from different faith traditions and have different levels of faith and involvement now - I am very active in the church while constantly questioning my faith and beliefs (I'm sort of a churchy agnostic) while she probably has more faith and no interest in attending or being part of a church. The main reason out 10 month old son isn't baptized yet is that I really want an old friend to be his God Father so we are waiting until that person (who lives in another country) can come visit.

 

[ReJoyce]

I think you need to evaluate why you have strayed from the Holy Roman Catholic Church. Was it a matter of inconvenience or indifferentism? In any case, I would encourage you to have your child baptized. Since you don't strike me as a militant atheist, I can't see why you would reject a ceremony which at best will endow your child with sanctifying grace and remit the penalty of original sin.

 

[BP348]

This is a decision that all parents have to make. I had both my daughters baptised and don't regret it for a minute.

 

[LatinStyleLover]

Originally Posted by Jodum5

You should be happy to read this: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn...042800831.html

I found the article interesting, although it has no impact on me since I do not believe any of it. I am somewhat astounded by the idea that these theologians conclude their is a basis for hope, but not a guarantee. So, if you have hope, but then die and find out the hope was misplaced does one get to offer a defense before God that the Vatican authorized panel said their was hope?

I only offered my thoughts on what was really upsetting his parents and my feeling that their was no downside to baptism. Personally, I do not buy the idea of original sin. I also do not buy the idea that, if their is a God, he would punish a still-born child for all eternity because of the sins of Adam and Eve? Make no mistake about it--if you cannot enter heaven, but are spared hell, that still sounds like condemnation to me. The only way that would make sense would be if the still-born child had previosuly existed, either through some sort of reincarnation or pre-existent life, and that tainting by original sin was punishment for previous transgressions. That, however, is not what Catholism teaches.

I may not follow any particular religion or belief system anymore, but I do believe in honoring my parents and if baptism would put my parents at ease without imposing any belief system on me then I certainly would not object. Frankly, my parents are probably as upset about my current philosophy as the OP's parents are about the salvation of their grandchild. I cannot really do anything about my own parents pain since it is based on my choices as an adult. In the OP's case baptizing his baby will not hurt the baby or his parents in any way so it seems the compassionate and honorable thing to do relating to his parents.

 

[Unregistered]

I'd never allow my child to go through the whole pointless routine of water being splashed on their head only to have them be labeled as something.