Things you just don't get

[Gibonius]



It is funny with some coworkers we were discussing the lethal injection and how it doesn't always go as planned and BOOM. It happened again. I just can't believe how it is so difficult to inject somebody with something and have them die. Almost anything will kill somebody if injected with enough of it. Of course, they want to do it humanely, but think about it this kind of thing never happens with putting down pets. Also, there are so many different anesthesia drugs that can pretty much kill you instantly if given even a little bit too much. Why is this so difficult?

Wasn't there something a while back where the distribution contracts on the drugs forbid their use for killing people. All of the doctors at the foreign drug companies must subscribe to the Hippocratic oath and didn't want their **** being used to do harm.

So they threatened to stop distributing to the US (including hospitals and places that actually need the anesthesia drugs) if they continued to use them to execute people.

I was going to say..."you'd think someone would step in and try to capture that market" but from the looks of this news, someone did try to capture that market...and they sucked at it.

Also: politics. Many states don't want to admit that their current drug cocktails aren't ideal for executions, as it would open them up to lawsuits. So they just double down on the current regime.


Guillotine is supposedly one of the most humane and reliable methods.

 

[gomestar]

if a drug cocktail isn't particularly good at killing people, then maybe think about a new recipe? after you knock somebody out, just blast them full of rat poison. or just give them too much of that medicine that knocks them out, things shouldn't be so complicated that they get botched 7% of the time (according to something I read earlier today)

 

[gomestar]

also, lol at the notion of an unreliable guillotine.

 

[Harold falcon]



Ok, that's a picture of him, but who is he?

Lyndon Baines. Johnson. Took over as President after JFK was killed. A truly despicable man who entrenched our nation in Vietnam and declared a "war on poverty" which continues to this day and threatens to bankrupt our country.

 

[HRoi]

I too don't grasp this notion of unreliable executions. Seems like a very simple problem to solve. But then again, I don't expect to win any human rights awards in my lifetime

 

[gomestar]

if you're an executioner, what are the odds that you also have a linked in profile?


i feel like an executioner would fit an easily stereotyped profile - cranky old person. it'd be awesome if there was an executioner named Darren who was young, active, an intense college basketball fan, and who had a tight group of friends, mostly former jocks.

"yo, D-bone, meet up on Thurs night?"


"can't man, Alfie the ****** has to go night night, but i can probably catch up later on in the night if you want. I'll holler at you after I zip him up"

 

[lawyerdad]



This was a big deal back in the day when they used swords and axes to behead people. The best executioners actually had to travel all over the country because they were so in demand.

Yeah, were's Iyn Payne when you need him?

 

[HRoi]

And how do you acquire the services of one? Is there something like an Angie's list for executioners?

This isn't the days of Henry VIII when he had every woman he had sex with executed. The demand isn't there for a full time gig anymore. So prisons either need a guy they can call, or have some random prison guard do it

 

[gomestar]



And how do you acquire the services of one? Is there something like an Angie's list for executioners?

This isn't the days of Henry VIII when he had every woman he had sex with executed. The demand isn't there for a full time gig anymore. So prisons either need a guy they can call, or have some random prison guard do it

i want to know how an interview would go. and then the discussion after between management.

"lots of strong candidates, but i'm most impressed with Jeffrey."




and if it's a random guard who does it, how do they pick who gets to be the lucky drug pusher? The world's most serious game of rock-paper-scissor?

 

[HRoi]

"I agree, Jeffrey is the most well rounded candidate. Dexter has better qualifications, and he aced the skills test, but he seemed to enjoy it a bit too much"

 

[Douglas]

I met an executioner once. I was in a service organization in high school that also brought in interesting speakers to come talk to us. The facilitator later was accused of being a pedophile, which was pretty much commonly known by all the guys that were members (it was an all-boys "club") but he was also a local judge. I am as close as I could possibly be to 100% certain he never touched anybody, but it was not uncommon for him to invite people to play tennis at his club and have a look at the merch.

But I digress.

This guy had an incredible knack for landing amazing speakers to come talk to this group, without any speaker fees. We had dozens of pro sports figures, notable news figures, Supreme Court justices, etc., also mixed in with oddball people from the news - one guy who had tackled a gunman shooting at the White House, and one day the executioner who performed the first execution in MD in several decades.

The guy was really interesting; he was so, so precise and clinical in his description of his duties; totally detached from the emotion of it like some kind of automaton. People tried to argue with him and bait him and he was really patient and mature and admirable and even-toned but also open (factually) in answering every question in thorough detail. It was fascinating and has stuck with me to this day.

 

[gomestar]

"Jeffrey it is, we'll send him an offer letter tomorrow afternoon. In the interim, can you put together an email note introducing him to the team?"



"how's this:

Welcome Jeffrey!

Please join me in welcoming Jeffrey to the Springfield county execution team as the lead executioner. Jeffrey will start with us on April 31st. Before joining us, Jeffrey was the assistant executioner at the Fairfax County Correctional facility where he oversaw the successful execution of 13 convicts. Jeffrey brings an excellent skill set, and he is excited to join the team.

Please be sure to give him a warm welcome to the team"

 

[zarathustra]



Guillotine is supposedly one of the most humane and reliable methods.

Was going to post this. Little messy, but hey gets the job done right the first time.

 

[GreenFrog]

The moment after your head rolls off your body, are there a few seconds where your brain is conscious of the fact that it's been beheaded? Can you still "see" for a couple seconds?

I'd imagine it's not an instantaneous death..

 

[ethanm]

The moment after your head rolls off your body, are there a few seconds where your brain is conscious of the fact that it's been beheaded? Can you still "see" for a couple seconds?

I'd imagine it's not an instantaneous death..

Apparently maybe up to 13 seconds?

**** me that sucks.