Subway and Public Transportation Etiquette - The People We Encounter

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by patrickBOOTH, Nov 18, 2011.

  1. Claghorn

    Claghorn Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    I dumped it in the middle of the subway car, sat in it, changed my job to performance artist, and am currently awaiting for the National Endowment for the Arts to throw money at me.

    (I discretely left it near a trash can)


    On another note, I'm either a hero or an asshole depending which side of my shoulder you are on.

    From now on, any time someone tries to get on a crowded train as people are beginning to exit (10+ people trying to get out minimum), I am slamming them with my shoulder. The degree of slam will depend on age, gender, and generally how much I dislike the way they look. Women over the age of 65 are exempt from my shoulder, as are men over 70. I've done this on accident in the past (incidental contact, then added a bit of emphasis). Today, I actually went after the guy. It felt good. It felt REEEAAAALLLL good.

    This is my new policy. Can anyone think of a reason to abandon it?
     
  2. patrickBOOTH

    patrickBOOTH Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    I've been doing the shoulder slamm for some time now. I do it to people who are Delta Crashers too.
     
  3. gomestar

    gomestar Super Yelper

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    crowded train this morning. Some twat was not moving in, and another guy belted out "hey iPhone. Move your useless as to the middle of the car." I smiled.
     
  4. patrickBOOTH

    patrickBOOTH Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    Yesterday when the train was packed there was this short stocky guy not budging for people. I wanted to scream at him, "Hey, stop trying to be a tough guy and let people on the train!" But I didn't want to get punched in the mouth.
     
  5. deepitm

    deepitm Senior member

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    Referring back to the heart attacks, seizures, etc. while driving, an old man had a heart attack and died and careened into my dad at a stop light and totaled my dad's Shelby GT500. This was back in the early 70's. Damn shame.
     
  6. Claghorn

    Claghorn Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    The end of this story involves me giving money to a blind beggar; to balance this out, I ignored a deaf beggar who grabbed my arm outside of the subway station.

    Blind folks routinely walk down the subway cars playing 1950's Korean music on discolored plastic radios. I have no idea where they get these radios; they only play this one type of music and it's music I've never heard anywhere but from such radios.

    This guy comes in and starts singing (a cappella). His voice is really hoarse and a little high. For a brief second, I thought he was a castrato. Totally haunting, definitely changing the mood of the subway car. I appreciated the new ambiance, but many of my fellow passengers shifted uncomfortably (he was no louder than the normal blind beggar radios). The tapping of his cane wasn't on beat, nor was there any pattern to it, contributing to the unease.

    His singing (and his song) put me in mind of Chavela Vargas' rendition of "La LLorona" for Frida. I wanted to give the guy 5,000 won, but all I had was 10,000 (about $8.50), so gave him that.
     
  7. gomestar

    gomestar Super Yelper

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  8. sugarbutch

    sugarbutch Bearded Prick Dubiously Honored

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    An NSFW wouldn't have gone amiss there, gomestar...
     
  9. gomestar

    gomestar Super Yelper

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    note to others: the complete title of the article in the above URL isn't "two young ladies filmed giving their children ice cream cones, cotton candy, and popcorn."
     
  10. sugarbutch

    sugarbutch Bearded Prick Dubiously Honored

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    Gracias.
     
  11. gomestar

    gomestar Super Yelper

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  12. FidelCashflow

    FidelCashflow Senior member

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    NYC's subway is something else - last time I was there I decided to check out downtown around Century 21, didn't get anything, stopped to get a smoothie at McDonalds and made my way towards the subway to head back to my hotel near times square.

    Some disheveled lady with what looked to be an *actual hole in her forehead* (to this day, I still can't figure out WTF it was - I was afraid to stare too long, but I still remember it) looks at me as I'm heading towards the subway entrance and casually comments "That's a tasty looking drink - must be refreshing on a hot day like today." - I just responded "yup" as I kept walking, she then starts to walk alongside me and asks "will you buy me one?" not knowing what to say I just said "No, thanks" and sped up a little, and she went ballistic. She started screaming and ranting about the heat and about how I had a smoothie and she didn't have one and it was unfair and I was a cheap MF'er - I just thought to myself "Oh God - just make it past a turnstile in the subway and it will be all good, she won't follow me" - she trailed me down the stairs screaming with her bags in tow - finally I get past the turnstile after swiping my card only and breathe a sigh of relief only to hear her say "YOU THINK I DON'T HAVE A METROCARD, BITCH?!?!?!" She then proceeded to scream at me on the platform for 4 minutes while I stood there uncomfortably pretending to not hear her and everyone else just watched until my train arrived :embar:.
     
    Last edited: Nov 30, 2012
  13. taxgenius

    taxgenius Senior member

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    You should've told her that you would buy it for her but it's not good for her figure. Also, when she said "YOU THINK I DON'T HAVE A METROCARD, BITCH?!?!?!" you could've told her "if so, why don't you buy yourself a smoothie if you can afford a metrocard."
     
    Last edited: Dec 1, 2012
  14. gomestar

    gomestar Super Yelper

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    this.


    also, carry a pair of noise-canceling headphones. Or any headphones.
     
  15. texas_jack

    texas_jack Senior member

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    Or push the bitch on the tracks
     

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