Do you still live with your parents?

[WSW]

Maybe parents just want the family to stay together a bit longer. I don't see how that's selfish. Afterall, family should help one another.

And technically, your parents could have just left you at an orphanage when you were born. Again, why didn't they? So I don't see anything wrong with staying home after you graduate college. I guess you shouldn't flaunt the fact your living expenses are subsidized though.

 

[Tiranis]

Moved out after Grade 12, just didn't feel right living with my parents, especially since I can afford my own, nice place and all that...

But I think anyone who's younger than 25 is fine living with their parents, no reason needed. If you're over 25 though and don't have a reason, well, that's just weird, imo.

 

[fortune]

Originally Posted by odoreater

Actually, my parents are getting mad at me for moving out. Having kids in the house (especially older ones with good jobs) brings a lot of value. My brother and I have finished the entire first floor of the house, built two decks around the house, installed new tiles, carpetting and wood floors, and probably added about $200,000 in value to our parents home.


Perhaps that's "rediculous" to you, but thankfully, not everyone is like you. Maybe you were just a thankless little leach while living with your parents (oops, was that a little too harsh?) but that's not everyone's story.

See what you've done is what I intend to do. Maybe not stay that late into my 20's, but nonetheless stay here for atleast 2 years of college, maybe 3. My commute from home to school won't be a burden 'less I choose to go to U of U instead of PSU. But as soon as I do graduate I intend on moving down to California. Basically I don't want to put my self into a major amount of debt and commitment only to be leaving a few years later, versus though childishly it may seem, living at home. Plus, my sister has two children (one 11 months and the other 5 years) and I'm sure she'll need help if my little sister can't do so, and my little brother is just going into middle school next year so by the time I graduate HS, he'll still be in middle school and I'll be able to further help my parents.

 

[Augusto86]

Originally Posted by sygyzy

Up until this current generation everyone understood the role of a parent and child. Every kid couldn't wait til he was 18 to move away and start his own independent life. Nowadays more and more people are moving home or never move away to begin with and they ALL have a great reason:

My parents need me
My parents are lonely
Why waste money on rent
I am saving up for a house
I have my own room and can bring girls home, my parents are way cool
My parents want me there
My dad is sick
I need to help my elderly mother with chores

Rediculous.

Ok, I have a lot of problems with this post. First you spelled ridiculous wrong. But more importantly,I think you make some clear logical errors. Keep in mind, I have lots of respect for people who strike out on their 18th or 16th or whatever birthday, and if that's the choice that makes you happy, then go for it with both hands.

But to say "it used to the be the norm" is nonsense. Maybe it used to be the norm for a certain subset of a certain demographic in the US. Across all of Latin America, Europe, the Middle East, and much of Asia it is not - you move from your parent's house to, when you can afford it, your house with your new wife, and often bring your parents with you.

Additionally, even in the US, if you work in a small town and go to work at the factory that your father works at, even if you do move out it's to a nearby house. Ditto for farmers. A certain adventurous type has always struck out to new places, the big city, etc., but definitely not everyone. Where is the money supposed to come from? You are aware of the spiralling prices of rent, property, etc. You can go to the country where it's cheap but then where are the jobs. FWIW, most of the people I know who have stalled or failed in life are not those who stayed dependent or semi-dependent on their parents, but those who headed out to do their own thing, sometimes at the age of 16 or 17, and ended up sunk in debt, dead-end jobs and filthy studio apartments with roommates, often crawling back to home and maybe going back to college on their parents' dime. YMMV. There are, of course, also those who are growing weed and playing WoW in their mother's basement, and that is even more depressing.

Finally, many of those excuses you gave are really valid! Particularly:

Why waste money on rent
I am saving up for a house
My dad is sick
I need to help my elderly mother with chores

You'd leave home if your father was invalid or your mother was getting on too much to do all the housework, just so you could "Make your own way?" That's some cold ******* ingratitude, man, a lot more so than mooching and playing Playstation all day. As far as rent - that's basically burning money. You get nothing for your investment. Why waste it? As far as parents charging kids rent - to my mind, culturally, that's unimaginable. That'd be almost as bad as charging your aged father rent.

 

[EL72]

My mother moved to the other side of the planet when i was 20 and I lived in her house with my sister while I was in University so I didn't pay rent. I moved out as soon as I got a job when I was 23.

 

[heavyd]

i left at 25 for new york city and lived in a tenement in astoria queens worked my way up and moved back to chicago 8 years later with the woman of my dreams...

we now own a townhouse in lincoln park - chicago.

 

[sho'nuff]

Originally Posted by Augusto86

As far as parents charging kids rent - to my mind, culturally, that's unimaginable. That'd be almost as bad as charging your aged father rent.

i agree with alot you said,
but the last time i moved back into my parents' home temporarily, i insisted i pay rent. this was because my work at that time was so close to them. they insisted i stay with them instead of paying rent somewhere.

i paid them every month $500 for more than a year.

a few years back when i got married, my parents gave me a big wedding gift, which ALSO INCLUDED the whole rent money i paid them back when i was with them last time.
i had no idea they did this, that they were planning this , and it touched our heart so much .


as far as my father or mother moving in with us later down the road, i will never charge them rent. but i tell you what, i know my dad, he will stuff the money down my throat, and even if i reject it , he will find sneaky ways to pay for things when he is with me.
that just how my family is. all about giving

 

[michaeljkrell]

I'm 24 and I still live with my dad. It is pretty much mutually beneficial. He is in his late 70s and I still have a younger brother with Down Syndrome and it would have been pretty rough for him to take care of everything himself since my mom died a few years ago. I don't pay rent, but I pay for 85% of my food and all my transportation etc.

I wouldn't really see moving out anytime soon even if the clothing business really gets going. I graduate in december so we will see what happens there. I actually wouldn't mind buying this current house down the road when I hopefully get married. My sister, her husband and eight kids live across the street as well...

 

[Matt]

most Australians I know pay rent to their parents (calling it board) once they start working. For the short time I lived with my mother while I was an earning-entity, I certainly did.

Culturally speaking - recent research here in Vietnam (that admittedly I was involved with) showed that 69% of a persons average monthly income is shared with the family unit - which in some ways is the same thing....once you earn, you contribute.

 

[ghulkhan]

I think many people throughout the world contribute earnings to the family household. However, I dont think its called "rent". Its just a cultural aspect in most places. If you earn money, you have to help support the household...but its not really rent.

I agree with Augusto, parents shouldnt ever charge you rent in most cases. Only if your 18, being a bum, and not doinganything with your life should they charge you money to get you to do something...

But if your living with your parents and making lots of money, you should contribute some money to help out...groceries..yard work...Thats the way it works in a lot countries...but its not "rent"

 

[Milhouse]

This is a very interesting discussion. I moved out for college at age 18. I lived with my parents the summer after my freshman year, and since then, I've lived on my own. I actually live alone now. It has taken quite a length of time to establish myself to this point, early on, I had no furniture, not even a bed. I just slowly work toward my goals, and carefully weigh the choices I am presented.

That said, I really found it necessary to move due to the high cost of living and poor job market where my parents live. One of my wishful thoughts is to become financially successful such that I can buy a nice place in the country, and have things like an orchard, bees for honey, grape vines for wine making, etc where my parents can retire, and I could raise children (if I ever end up having children).

 

[dtmt]

I really don't get the point of charging kids rent, unless the family is in serious debt or something.

I mean, when the children earn the money, it is taxed. When the parents collect the rent, they have to pay tax on it as rental income. When the parents eventually die and leave the money back to the children, they have to pay inheritance/estate tax (at ridiculous confiscatory rates). Basically this is just flushing money down the toilet.

 

[cmrocks]

I live with my parents in the summer when I'm home from school. After I'm done school, I'll probably still keep my home base here until I figure out what I'm doing. There is a very good chance that I'm going to be working in Colombia so I'll probably leave most of my stuff with my parents and move down there, rent a place and go from there.

I don't see the point of getting my own, permenant residence until I'm ready to have a family. I want to be able to pack up and move anywhere I want with relative ease. I don't really need much stuff to live how I like.

Ideally, if I had the money and found an area I loved, I would like to buy the place and rent it out to help pay for the mortage payment. That won't be realistic for several years however.

 

[cmrocks]

Originally Posted by dtmt

I really don't get the point of charging kids rent, unless the family is in serious debt or something.

I mean, when the children earn the money, it is taxed. When the parents collect the rent, they have to pay tax on it as rental income. When the parents eventually die and leave the money back to the children, they have to pay inheritance/estate tax (at ridiculous confiscatory rates). Basically this is just flushing money down the toilet.

My Mom wanted to charge me "room and board" until I explained something similar to her. The extra room was just sitting empty and I don't imagine that I add much to the utilities every month. My Mom owns a nice place but doesn't have a really big income so to help her out, I buy groceries and living supplies most of the time. I think it's the least I can do.

 

[rdawson808]

Originally Posted by iammatt

Moved out the summer before college started and never went back for more than a vacation. They have since moved very close to where we live (4 or 5 blocks) so I am thinking of heading to a different state.


Hilarious, Matt. What, are they stalking you? My oldest sister and her husband and kids had a house built only 4 doors from our parents. Ridiculous. We're (my other sister and I) are pretty sure it was for the easy babysitting.

I think it's perfectly acceptable (and preferable) to stay home due to extenuating circumstances, like parents or grandparents who need to be taken care of, personal crisis, etc. as some of you have described. My wife needed a major change in her life and moved back in with her parents at a later age to figure it all out. When she had it figured out, she moved back out.

Originally Posted by dtmt

I really don't get the point of charging kids rent, unless the family is in serious debt or something.

It is quite another thing, however, to not move out because you think rent is too much to pay. Grow up and move out. If you are an adult (out of college/employed) and living at home, you pay them rent, dtmt, because you are capable of paying your rent and living on your own. They do not owe you a place to live any more. Would you say the same to a hotel, that they should give you a room for free because it's empty? Your tax argument is utterly disingenuous.

And DucatiCole, having a place that you can move from easily when you want is called renting. Check it out some time.

I left for college at 19 only came back for summer and winter holidays and then moved across country at 21. I haven't spent more than a couple weeks at my parents' home since. I have my own life. When they are older and need caring for, my sisters and I will decide what to do. If that means moving back across country to take care of them, I will do that. I owe them that.

After carrying me for nine months, raising me, keeping a roof over my head, putting up with my teenage shenanigans, making my car payments for me in college (against my objections and for which I paid them back), my parents don't need my lazy ass on their couch ruining their retirement. No matter how many times they would tell you that it's fine for me to move back home, it's a lie. It's not alright.

bob