Things you just don't get

[brokencycle]



Capitalism! People want to be entertained. Also the football coach as a public employee thing is misleading because most college football programs are self sustaining. This graphic would lead people to believe that coaches are being paid with tax dollars.

Most college sports programs aren't self sustaining. While typically the football program is, it winds up using the money to fund others sports programs.

 

[lasbar]



dog walkers

Is the size of the dog is taking into account???

Is a poodle walker paid as much as a Saint Bernard one?

 

[gomestar]

dog walkers

Is the size of the dog is taking into account???

Is a poodle walker paid as much as a Saint Bernard one?

varies a little. little dogs can be pains in the asses too (and IME they more frequently are). And poodles can push an active 70lbs. "Everytime i see someone with 10 dogs in tow, I think that's $400 an hour right there" Not my original quote.

 

[Gibonius]



So, I've observed an interesting phenomenon as I've gotten older and people I know have paired off: Somewhere around 30, it becomes the norm for women to marry well beneath their attractiveness. At first I thought it was a money, or marrying a successful older man, thing, but these women all seem to marry guys near their age. (Or maybe I'm looking at it from the wrong gender norm, and these guys are all outkicking their coverage.)

At first I thought it was just my inability to judge dudes based upon their attractiveness, but MrsG agrees that it has become pervasive since my group of (Facebook) friends has turned the 30 corner.

Either way, is this the norm? If so, what causes it? And why don't we have a name for it?

I'd bet this is driven from the other side. High value men (attractive, rich, whatever) can marry younger younger women and are less likely to be interested in the 30-something singles. It's hard for women to date younger, since younger men are less likely to be ready to settle down and have kids, which gets to be a pressing issue around then. Women don't gain as much value from career success, relative to male peers.


I've seen this with women physicians/researchers. The stereotypical doctor (esp. Asians) worked their ass off at the expense of social life to get through undergrad, med school, residency. Now they're ~30, making good money, and want a husband. But men in their social demographic are either married already,don't care about the money so much, or want a younger wife. So they settle for someone below their level.

 

[otc]

Isn't there something about women caring less about pure physical attractiveness, especially later on?

Maybe the average looking dudes had to try harder in the past and learned a thing or two... And now they are the only ones who can satisfy her.

Also, a lot of dudes deteriorate fast. Balding... Metabolism slows down (but the beer drinking doesn't) and the muscles they spent their free time growing in college/early 20s have finally completely deteriorated...

 

[Piobaire]

I think Gib has it mainly correct. Higher value males still single in their 30s can go for higher value, younger females. Hot and successful chics in their 30s have basically two choices: older dood or same age but more beta than they could have landed in their younger years.

 

[MrG]

Gib's assessment is pretty much my guess, too, but it doesn't explain why the women don't go for better dudes who are a little older. If the tendency is for guys to marry down in age, shouldn't a hot 30ish woman still be able to land a nice looking 35-40-year-old guy in the same way a 20-something woman gets the 30-year-old guy? Men are generally regarded as getting more attractive with age (to a point), so the pickings ostensibly aren't that skim. Do the women really value age over attractiveness?

FWIW, I know I'm being unspeakably shallow here and there's more to love than looks, but it seems like fives marry fives and 10s marry 10s right up until the start of the forth decade, when it goes wonky. It's clear physical attraction is critical to most folks, but there's a cutoff where it downgrades substantially.

 

[Ambulance Chaser]

A less attractive mate is less likely to stray would be my guess.

 

[otc]

Kinda sounds like you are saying you wish you had waited a few more years

 

[Find Finn]

I believe its about finding a good mate and someone who will be a good parent at that point and not taking the fittest, which is way the saying goes that nice guys get all the girls later on in life.

 

[Gibonius]

Mid-30s and on is when the divorced guys start hitting the market, or where still single guys are likely to be damaged in some way. Why's a high value single guy still going to be on the market by that point, unless he's been playing the field a lot? A lot of women don't want to be trying to convince the perpetual bachelor/playboy to finally settle down when their clock is ticking down.

 

[MrG]



A less attractive mate is less likely to stray would be my guess.

I think that might be a part of it. They've probably seen a lot of BS and realize it's in their interest to marry into a little bit of gratefulness.

Kinda sounds like you are saying you wish you had waited a few more years

No. Not at all. I know you're kidding, but I want to be clear that this isn't what I'm saying.

Plus, all these guys are doing is stealing from my playbook. I was smart enough to out kick my coverage in my mid 20s.

 

[ethanm]



Most college sports programs aren't self sustaining. While typically the football program is, it winds up using the money to fund others sports programs.

You are right. What I meant was that the ultra high paid coaches come from self sustaining football programs.

 

[Piobaire]



Gib's assessment is pretty much my guess, too, but it doesn't explain why the women don't go for better dudes who are a little older. If the tendency is for guys to marry down in age, shouldn't a hot 30ish woman still be able to land a nice looking 35-40-year-old guy in the same way a 20-something woman gets the 30-year-old guy? Men are generally regarded as getting more attractive with age (to a point), so the pickings ostensibly aren't that skim. Do the women really value age over attractiveness?

FWIW, I know I'm being unspeakably shallow here and there's more to love than looks, but it seems like fives marry fives and 10s marry 10s right up until the start of the forth decade, when it goes wonky. It's clear physical attraction is critical to most folks, but there's a cutoff where it downgrades substantially.

I think there's some tipping point. A good looking 40 year old guy on the market with money has little incentive to settle down at that point. I think 35 or so years ago he'd be looking to settle but things have changed. That guy is either divorced, probably with kids (so doesn't want to re-settle again, at least not right away), or he's probably not looking for a typical family at that point and getting all the trim he can handle from chics 25-his age. If that 30-ish woman doesn't want to settle she's might well be with a good looking guy in his 40s with money. If she's looking to nest she's going to have to shop downmarket.

 

[lawyerdad]



Gib's assessment is pretty much my guess, too, but it doesn't explain why the women don't go for better dudes who are a little older.

Some do. But there's only so much of me to go around.