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Alcoholic?

post #1 of 24
10/17/08 at 3:09pm
Thread Starter 
So I've got a friend (yes, really) and for as long as I've known, they regularly drink...

You should know:
1. I have NEVER ever seen the friend drunk or out of control, it simply never happens.
2. The friend drinks usually 1-2 glases of wine or hard alcohol, which doesn't seem like much but it's consistently, like almost every day. Sometimes it's more like 2-3 in a night. Typically comes home from work and has a drink or two and has done so for years and years.
3. At social gatherings, the friend is always offering others drinks (pours generously) before they've even had a chance to settle in.

Is this alcoholism?
(I realize things could be worse, I'm just worried I'm the only one noticing the regularity.)

Thanks, opinions and advice are really appreciated on this one (ie try not to be an asshole, this is a sensistive topic)
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post #2 of 24
10/17/08 at 3:17pm
It isn't always easy to tell if someone is an alcoholic. One person can drink a lot and not be and the other can drink very little and be an alcoholic. It has more to do with how the person deals with the drinking and how that person feels when they drink. Science has pretty much concluded that it has to do with the person's brain chemistry and uses the term "addictive personality" to describe the person who has a definite urge to drink, gamble, snort, etc. more. It becomes an irresistible drive. I'd advise talking to some experts and then asking their advice as to how to approach your friend. Of course, that depends on your goal. What exactly do you want to accomplish? Intervention? Other help? Avoidance?
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post #3 of 24
10/17/08 at 3:18pm
I would say drinking a few glasses of hard liquor every night is alcoholism
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post #4 of 24
10/17/08 at 3:22pm
Here's a website that says it far better than I could:

http://helpguide.org/mental/alcohol_..._treatment.htm
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post #5 of 24
10/17/08 at 3:26pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Master-Classter View Post
So I've got a friend (yes, really) and for as long as I've known, they regularly drink...

You should know:
1. I have NEVER ever seen the friend drunk or out of control, it simply never happens.
2. The friend drinks usually 1-2 glases of wine or hard alcohol, which doesn't seem like much but it's consistently, like almost every day. Sometimes it's more like 2-3 in a night. Typically comes home from work and has a drink or two and has done so for years and years.
3. At social gatherings, the friend is always offering others drinks (pours generously) before they've even had a chance to settle in.

Is this alcoholism?
(I realize things could be worse, I'm just worried I'm the only one noticing the regularity.)

Thanks, opinions and advice are really appreciated on this one (ie try not to be an asshole, this is a sensistive topic)


It may not be the healthiest thing to consume that amount of alcohol on a regular basis, but you don't provide enough information to make any sort of determination regarding alcoholism. A commonly accepted test for alcoholism is (1) when I drink can I always control the amount I drink, and (2) given sufficient reason, can I abstain from drinking. Other classic symptoms of alcoholism are blackouts, withdrawals after stopping drinking, etc. As someone else mentioned, a lot of it has to do with the effect alcohol produces for the person. Commonly alcoholics don't drink to feel the buzz that most social drinkers feel, they drink to feel normal. They don't feel comfortable when they are not drinking.

I am a recovered alcoholic and know tons of them obviously, and I have never met one who consumed so little alcohol as your friend and who didn't have a lot of problems related to drinking. I have a lot of friends who drink a helluva lot more than your friend and they are not alcoholics. Heavy and abusive drinkers are not always alcoholics.

That's a pretty short and vague answer to your question. You may consider checking out www.soberrecovery.com for more info. There are tons of questions over there about what may or may not be alcoholism.

Good luck.
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post #6 of 24
10/17/08 at 3:30pm
I think that often what is perceived in the US as excessive or inappropriate consumption is in Europe seen as nothing out of the ordinary.
I usually have a couple of glasses of red with dinner. Maybe a digestive before beddy-byes...
At the FIAT subsidiary I work at three or four days a week - an engineering company where heavy machinery is used and agricultural equipment is test driven - they served wine with lunch, until two years ago. My work there started after the unfortunate decision to cease this civilised habit was taken.
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post #7 of 24
10/17/08 at 3:30pm
1-3 glasses a day? He may be an alcoholic or he may be European.

I wouldn't be too worried about that amount.
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post #8 of 24
10/17/08 at 3:33pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by FlyingLotus View Post
I would say drinking a few glasses of hard liquor every night is alcoholism

You don't know any alcoholics I assume. A couple of glasses a night is nothing.
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post #9 of 24
10/17/08 at 4:29pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by FlyingLotus View Post
I would say drinking a few glasses of hard liquor every night is alcoholism

thank you, I just realised that I'm an alcoholic by your definition....
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post #10 of 24
10/17/08 at 4:31pm
I lately I have been having a drink or two after work. It may be wine, hard liquor or beer. sometimes I will take a drink with me to bed. I swear, I am not an alcoholic. I don't feel compelled to drink, it just makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.
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post #11 of 24
10/17/08 at 4:33pm
Drinking is one of life's greatest pleasures.
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post #12 of 24
10/17/08 at 4:35pm
Whether or not you're an alcoholic depends on how drinking interferes with other aspects of your life i.e. work, family... not the amount you drink.
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post #13 of 24
10/17/08 at 5:12pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by EL72 View Post
Whether or not you're an alcoholic depends on how drinking interferes with other aspects of your life i.e. work, family... not the amount you drink.

Exactly.
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post #14 of 24
10/17/08 at 5:19pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by EL72 View Post
Whether or not you're an alcoholic depends on how drinking interferes with other aspects of your life i.e. work, family... not the amount you drink.

+1.

you can be a functioning alchy. I can drink a few glasses of wine a night or 4-6 beers and be totally fine the next day. It never gets to the point where I miss work. Of course on weekends, thats another story...
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post #15 of 24
10/17/08 at 5:45pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by EL72 View Post
Whether or not you're an alcoholic depends on how drinking interferes with other aspects of your life i.e. work, family... not the amount you drink.

What if my work, family and friends nearly expect me to drink? It doesnt interfere with my life whatsoever, other than that I have to take the taxi a bit more often..
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