The hardest thing I've ever done...

[Dakota rube]

I'd help her move her ****. Then go all primal on her right after you get the bed moved into her new place.

And then walk away.
Forever.

 

[HomerJ]

Hardest thing I've ever done = myself. I'm like a diamond in an ice storm baby.

 

[Go Surface]

Originally Posted by Eason

Ah, good old SF, every thread turns into Conne-bashing

Really, I'm happy to be out of it, except I don't like to hurt other people. Thinking about how sad I made her is really the most depressing part of it, I'll want to pick up her calls, but it's just going to make it harder if I do.

Eventually, she'll understand that it would have been awful of her to make someone feel trapped in a relationship they did not want to be a part of. Or not, you are a catch.

 

[ratboycom]

Originally Posted by Dakota rube

I'd help her move her ****. Then go all primal on her right after you get the bed moved into her new place.

And then walk away.
Forever.

+1, Do anal if you can, or just do it anyway.


Also Eason, its too bad the passes are shoit right now, otherwise I would invite you to have a beer with me and some homies (and womens) this weekend. The distance thing sucks, I know on a personal level (Fiance is in Japan...), and some can make it work, others cant, but eventually the distance does pull at you. I mean, there have been many girls who I could have bedded easily if I wanted to (perhaps I did) but eventually thoughts of my girl made me not do it. Give it a day or two, let her calm down and call her, talk about things and stand hard about where you are with your decision.

 

[Eason]

Originally Posted by SoCal2NYC

How long were you together before it turned into LD? My roomate started dating a girl like March of Sr. year of HS, we moved away to college that summer (3-3.5 hrs away) and they ended up staying together until the end of Jr. year. It sucked, it was such a drag on him because he felt tied down and pissed me off because I hated her and the **** she would pull about being apart.

6 months before it went LD. This girl is not 3.5 hours away, she's a 15 hour plane ride away. That's basically how I felt, tied down and just staying with her because it was the "right" thing to do, despite her bringing me down.

ratboy, sounds like good advice, since it sounds like you have a similiar experience. I will try and talk to her in a couple days when she is no longer having panic attacks and sobbing uncontrolably.

 

[James Bond]

I did the same thing about a month and a half ago with my girlfriend of two years (about a year and a half long distance). I could have married that girl but our lives seem to be headed on divergent paths.

 

[dah328]

Originally Posted by Eason

6 months before it went LD. This girl is not 3.5 hours away, she's a 15 hour plane ride away. That's basically how I felt, tied down and just staying with her because it was the "right" thing to do, despite her bringing me down.
Your reasoning for ending it was that the LD was too hard and yet you did that for 2.5 years before calling it quits? If that's the case, I've gotta' side with the minority opinion and say you should have either taken the next step or ended it a long time ago.

 

[West24]

wooopss

 

[SoCal2NYC]

Originally Posted by Eason

6 months before it went LD. This girl is not 3.5 hours away, she's a 15 hour plane ride away. That's basically how I felt, tied down and just staying with her because it was the "right" thing to do, despite her bringing me down.

If I meet you I'm going to slap you.

 

[Eason]

I take it you think we hadn't seen eachother since the first 6 months- we visted for about a month at a time every 6 months after that.

 

[cmrocks]

Sorry to hear that man but it sounds like you did the best thing. If there is any doubt in your mind about the relationship, it's probably for the best.

I recently ended things with my LD girlfriend. She was a 10 hour plane ride away. I was going to be able to see her every few months for a month at a time but I had too many doubts about the relationship. She was positive that I was the one for her but I just didn't feel the same way. I spent too much time thinking about other possibilities and I knew that wasn't a healthy situation.

The other issue is that I thought we were both too young. I'm only 22 and I don't think I'm ready for anything that serious yet. I change my mind about life too often.

 

[hi-val]

Originally Posted by SoCal2NYC

If I meet you I'm going to slap you.

People don't hit puberty, get interested in others and then get a manual for Doing Relationships Right. It's even a hard time asking others for advice because you get bad advice from people who are clueless and bitter themselves.

I'm not gonna fault the guy for being in a relationship and not knowing why it wasn't working, if it wasn't working, if he should end it or how he should end it. It'd be a lot easier if we could tell him to read Chapter 12 on failed relationships, but the best teacher is experience in this case.




In any case, good luck mate.