Girl Issues, Need Advice vol. infinity

[Matt]

Originally Posted by Star

I need to vent that I have a colleague at work where things did not turn out. I dont want to go into the details other than to say that everytime I think I have got over her 'she pulls me back in!' It is by way of coming by my desk, emailing or messaging me for work related stuff, or I somehow get dragged back via other co-workers we are jointly on good terms with. I am looking forward to the day when I switch companies and I have her out of sight and hopefully out of mind. When I can say to her on my last day at 5pm 'it was nice knowing you but now it is all finnished'.

Originally Posted by Star

Consciously she wants me in her friendzone and subconsciously I have no doubt I am her 'backup' in ife if things fall through with her current real bf. Neither of these suit me. The challenge is ignoring her given I have been given a project she is on (as an SME) and trying not to come across as 'me' being the 'problem' either through being rude or distant as I end labelled as the one with issues. Either way I will keep comms with her to a minimum, begave professionally and look forward to that job change (whenever that day may come). I probably also need to find someone else to distract me but currently there is no one.
I don't think I understand this situation, or at least, my understanding of it is not painting you in the best light. A colleague, with a boyfriend, emails you at work about work (which is what colleagues do) or comes to your desk to talk about work (which is what colleagues do), or you find yourself out and about with her because there's a work thing happening (which is what happens at work things) and you are upset that she is "dragging you back in" because you have convinced yourself that she has made you Plan B. As far as I can tell, the posts above don't indicate that she has you as Plan Anything other than "the guy who sits 5 cubicles away", and she's not dragging you "back" anywhere - it sounds more like you were never there to begin with. Are you leaving something out of this story?

 

[austerlitz]

OP, i am guessing the party was a bust since we have seen no updates

 

[unjung]

I will PM the OP.

 

[christinedaae]

Originally Posted by austerlitz

OP, i am guessing the party was a bust since we have seen no updates

probably went to the party and blew some dude in thebathroom

 

[DerekS]

I need to start reading these "i need women advice" posts. hot damn theres some pathetic **** going on. Reading this made me feel like james ******* bond.

 

[Dakota rube]

Originally Posted by DerekS

Reading this made me feel like james ******* bond.

Compared to many of our SF brethren, you ARE James ******* Bond.

 

[deadly7]

Originally Posted by Dakota rube

Compared to many of our SF brethren, you ARE James ******* Bond.

What on earth would that make you? I'd guess you probably have all of SF beat in number of girls.

 

[Dakota rube]

^No way.
I am a eunuch compared to some of the cocksmen around here.

 

[DerekS]

Originally Posted by BlackShoes

People always trip up on the basics, it's a pity really, to see people squander opportunity (read, *****) needlessly.

Im grateful for guys like this. Because Im always there to pick up the slack.

 

[gort]

Originally Posted by DerekS

I need to start reading these "i need women advice" posts. hot damn theres some pathetic **** going on. Reading this made me feel like james ******* bond.

Which James Bond do you feel like *******? I'd probably opt for Connery, but Craig looked pretty nice in his swim suit.

 

[DerekS]

Originally Posted by gort

Which James Bond do you feel like *******? I'd probably opt for Connery, but Craig looked pretty nice in his swim suit.

 

[Barry Off Eastenders]

In college it's so easy, there are always a million social activities going on, in any conversation the question is asked, what are you up to? You just say, my friends and I will be at (insert name of bar or party location) friday, you should stop by.... you leave it at that, no matter her response, yes, no, or maybe, you answer "cool" and leave it at that...

If she shows up you make your move, if she doesn't who cares you're at a bar or party with a room full of chicks!

 

[HgaleK]

Bamp

 

[CalTex]

Originally Posted by DerekS

I need to start reading these "i need women advice" posts. hot damn theres some pathetic **** going on. Reading this made me feel like james ******* bond.

lol well I am glad that someone is getting off to our inability to land some girls. lol

 

[CalTex]

NEW PROBLEM!!!!

Okay not really but just wanted to see what you guys think.

I was in the library this morning (1am-6am) and there was this columbian girl that cought my eye. So after making eye contact a couple of times, I got her attention and made up some BS.

Boy: Hey do you have a brother by any chance?
Girl: yes I do
(Idol conversation, I pretty much say that I had a friend whos sister she looked like and other jazz)

I ask her what she is studying for, and I find out she is a senior and going to dental school. I proceeded to ask her if she had a SO an she said "there is someone that I am talking to right now" and I think I played it off okay. She asked me for my name and I continued the conversation for few more min. She asks me my name, shake hands nice to meet you and all that jazz.

When she leave I make eye contact with her again and she says bye and nice to meet you, couple more sentences of idol conversation and that was that. So I would say that I think I was more interested in the conversation than she was, but I caught her looking at me a couple of times.

What do you guys make of it and how would you guys make idol conversation with a girl that you do not even know and dont even go to the same school as her.

On another note: I believe that I am progressing in my confidence level a bit, but i feel that I need to figure out how to read chicks a bit better, at least the not so obvious ones.