sofaking9000
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- Mar 3, 2011
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She's close to 60, though i'm not sure her exact age
My dad wants nothing to do with her, to the point where he's willing to let the bank foreclose on a house as long as he doesn't have to deal with her. It'll make the divorce nice and easy to finalize, which he's been trying to do since 2002 or 2003. They've been separated since the 90s. She cost him millions (his entire life's work) when the hotel went bankrupt. It was his fault as well for not being more forceful with her and not lawyering up before things came to a head with the gov't, but he was playing nice because we the kids were still in the picture and it cost him everything (he lost the other 2 kids anyway; I'm the only one that speaks to him). Ultimately she usurped control and kept information from him while he lived in a different city to supplement family income (hotel was on an aggressive mortgage repayment schedule) so his options were limited if he wanted to maintain relative peace for our sake.
Someone mentioned snotty teenagers.... She is one. She's 60 or 65 (can never remember what year she was born) and she behaves exactly like a teenager. She was kicked out of her parents house last year. My siblings don't talk to her at all. She has tantrums and won't talk. I constantly have to intervene on her behalf with the rest of the family (though to be fair her sisters are kinda bitches). I'm a part-time mediator b/c of this and was for the divorce too - I had to diffuse her delusions about my father's hidden wealth.
When you tell her something she doesn't want to hear, she ignores it, no matter who it comes from. That doesn't stop her from asking for money after she's contravened your advice and suffers the consequences. I don't know how many times i've had to pay bailiffs for her. The only reason i continue to do it is because if she loses the grand piano then she loses something essential to being able to earn a living.
None of this is new behavior that's the resultant of the onset of old age. She thinks only about how things affect her (my father's principal complain from the marriage), and always has. She used to leave me overnight at school to find a place to sleep. It happened so often my physics prof found out and gave me free residence (it helped i was his best student so he could call it a scholarship). Yeah, great parenting there...
There are myriad reasons why I'm not close to her. I'm long over them, but we will never be close, and i'm fine with that at this point. That said, I don't want to see her live in poverty either, and I try to encourage her on positive things, like starting to teach piano again, keeping her from losing it to bailiffs, getting settled in a new city, but this **** is plain dumb and i'm not going to sugarcoat it to spare her feelings. This is her 3rd time bringing this up, and I shot it down nicely the past two times.If it's not this it'll be something else b/c she keeps looking for things that amount to being get rich quick schemes to make everything OK.
I'm at a loss as to how i should deal with her. She's a total disaster. I'm actually telling my grandparents to put her inheritance into an annuity or something so she can't piss it away all at once, because given the chance, she will.
Feel your pain bro, my parents are worse