ex lied about being pregnant! thanks for all your help.

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Originally Posted by hendrix

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She tricked him. This is her fault.

No.

Originally Posted by hendrix

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He's still responsible legally, and if it is his kid he should do the right thing.

it's not the end of the world.

Yes, you redeemed yourself nicely here.

Originally Posted by BlackShoes

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but make sure to emphasise that she will get nothing from you.

If the baby is born, the OP has no choice in the matter; he will pay.

Originally Posted by deranged

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I don't think i have the capability to raise a child financially, or emotionally.

...i will not be there for either her or the child emotionally. financially maybe, but that's another matter because i'll be in school for another couple of years.

Again, you have no choice; if you are the father, the law will collect money from you to support the child, at least until it is 18 years old. Here in the U.S., your wages will be garnished to make sure the bill is paid. If you do not pay, you will likely lose your drivers license, and I've heard of people losing their passport.

Dodging child support is a really stupid thing to consider.

Originally Posted by deranged

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thank you all for your input, i will update as soon as there i get more info.

she was very rational and we calculated that the fetus/blastocyst is only a bit over a week old - gives me 19 more weeks to work with.
she is very against the abortion pill because she is scared of the cramps and 3 weeks of bleeding, so she is considering the "surgical" method if she decides to abort.


No advise or judgment either way. Just some information.

I don't know what week you think is your deadline, but if she's missed her period she's 4-5 weeks pregnant, not one week. The age of pregnancy is based upon the date of the beginning of the last known period. 40 weeks from that date is the expected delivery.

Moreover, you don't want to wait until the last legal week to have the surgical procedure because there are several possible procedures; fewer options are available the later you get.

Originally Posted by Dakota rube

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If the baby is born, the OP has no choice in the matter; he will pay.


A simple matter of leaving the country or playing fast and loose with the truth about your income (then leaving the country). There are other possible ways to get round it as well.

OP: Do you have stairs in your house? If so, then you are protected.

People fall all the time.

dude your ex is going to ruin this kids life...ABORT!

I'm sorry OP, but you're screwed. FWIW I've had a girl get pregnant on me so that 'then he will never leave' in pretty similar circumstances, but I had her at the clinic the next morning with basically no discussion. Seemingly yours is going to be a little less malleable on this point...but I do both sympathise and empathise with your position.

I hope, for your sake, she has the abortion, neither of you are ready for this kind of responsibility. But, if she does not, ultimately, you're screwed.

If she has the kid - which is out of your hands now - it's gonna cost you. Time, money, sleep, whatever. 18 to life right there. You'll probably even love the thing...there's something you may not have thought of.

All the 'crazy *****' whining in the world won't change that, and there is no sneaky backdoor way to get around that. The time for sneaky access to backdoors was a few weeks ago.

Ultimately you can get into the 'it's not my fault' talk all you like, the bottom line of it is, no matter which one of the two of you is at fault, the one person who has no responsibility to take for this whatsoever, is the kid.

So man up and do what you need to for the kid's sake.

Originally Posted by deranged

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this could potentially ruin everything i've ever worked for...

I have no means to support a kid. They're expensive, and I have a part time job at school...

Grow the **** up. You wanted to ****, you were stupid enough to *** inside of a girl who was basically a stranger now you might have to deal with a kid. Your life is not"over" it just might be about to change.

Life rarely goes exactly as planed. No make that NEVER goes as planed.
So if you are indeed going to be a dad.... deal with it. Plans CAN be changed. Start thinking really hard about earning a living now, start saving for your kids college, think about health insurance, and all the rest.
As much as you might not have wanted it you very well might have it and the only thing you can do is man the **** up.

Oh and USE CONDOMS YOU STUPID *****!!!!

Congrats

OP, I'm in your corner, and remember - on SF that's all that counts.

PM me or give me a call and we will work thru this together.

Sorry OP but at this point I hope you have the kid just so he can grow up to be a college athlete. I hear LSU has a great athletics program.

Originally Posted by Rambo

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Sorry OP but at this point I hope you have the kid just so he can grow up to be a college athlete. I hear LSU has a great athletics program.

Dude the mom is an 86 lb asian. Chances of any kind of athlete other than ping pong player are nil.

the kid could be a horse jockey depending on height and weight of father

**** the kid and **** that "life rarely goes as planned" bullshit. There's no way I'd let a cent of my money go towards supporting someone that manipulated me into staying with her by getting pregnant. Finish your grad program, and then peace out of the country.

the idea of "getting pregnant" is so weird. like she did it on her own.