MarkI
Distinguished Member
- Joined
- Sep 11, 2007
- Messages
- 2,930
- Reaction score
- 1,781
I've lurked this forum for awhile, most SW&D but I linger everywhere. A lot of what I've gathered is that unlike other forums there are a wealth of somewhat intelligent, knowledgeable older folks here, which is nice, cause as a young person I need some advice/perspective....
The only reason i'm taking the path in life I am now is because of my parents.
I feel like it's warranted, despite having to raise 3 kids (i'm the oldest) with the odds being against their side, and emigrating to this country from Soviet Russia, they have done an amazing job.
My dad works 12 hour days doing some bullshit work killing himself just to sustain us, with one day off off a week. Never complains.
I graduated HS early in January strictly for the purpose of going to college early, getting it all done as quick as possible and then making their quality of life better. It's a 2.5 year RN program, and i'll be honest when I say that 90% of me doest want to do it, my passions lie elsewhere.
Last thing I want to do is shlep myself to a community college for 3 years to become a nurse, get a job, etc.
I'd love to go away to some school, have the basic college experience etc. I feel like i'm missing out on so much ****, but at the same time I feel like it's the right thing to do, given the sacrifice my parents have made me for me, and how I feel indebted to them.
And it's not like they realize i'm doing it for them, I don't state it blatantly, they think this is what I wanna do.
I know it's the right to do, and I owe it to them. But I often wonder how much of myself am I giving up, and will this path ever lead to internal happiness? I absolutely will feel fulfilled and happy when I can begin to help out my parents, but like I said, at the same time how much of myself am I giving up?
The only reason i'm taking the path in life I am now is because of my parents.
I feel like it's warranted, despite having to raise 3 kids (i'm the oldest) with the odds being against their side, and emigrating to this country from Soviet Russia, they have done an amazing job.
My dad works 12 hour days doing some bullshit work killing himself just to sustain us, with one day off off a week. Never complains.
I graduated HS early in January strictly for the purpose of going to college early, getting it all done as quick as possible and then making their quality of life better. It's a 2.5 year RN program, and i'll be honest when I say that 90% of me doest want to do it, my passions lie elsewhere.
Last thing I want to do is shlep myself to a community college for 3 years to become a nurse, get a job, etc.
I'd love to go away to some school, have the basic college experience etc. I feel like i'm missing out on so much ****, but at the same time I feel like it's the right thing to do, given the sacrifice my parents have made me for me, and how I feel indebted to them.
And it's not like they realize i'm doing it for them, I don't state it blatantly, they think this is what I wanna do.
I know it's the right to do, and I owe it to them. But I often wonder how much of myself am I giving up, and will this path ever lead to internal happiness? I absolutely will feel fulfilled and happy when I can begin to help out my parents, but like I said, at the same time how much of myself am I giving up?