Thanksgiving MIL issues

What are people's thoughts on warm plates and 'fresh' glasses? My mother-in-law makes a huge deal about baking all the plates in the oven until they cannot safely be handled w/o an oven mitt ("oh, it keeps the food so much warmer!"). We only have a single oven which is kept pretty busy as the final preparations for the meal are being executed. It really p!sses me off when I go to pop something in the oven for a couple of minutes only to find a huge stack of plates in there. I must have switched them back and forth a half a dozen times last year.

Another thing is the wine glasses. She (MIL) insists in replacing everyone's glass every time a new varietal is introduced. People start of sipping white as they munch on appetizers and help pull things together. I should note that we are enthusiastic, if casual, drinkers. Someone needs a refill they go to the fridge and pour from whatever bottle is open. If my MIL sees someone opening a fresh bottle of a 'new' wine the cry goes up for new glasses ("We're switching over to Viognier everyone! Who needs a new glass?"). Of course when we sit down and the red gets opened we go through the drill again. To be fair, most people just shrug and say 'that's OK, I'll just keep this glass', but she does manage to fill the sink w/ glasses from the folks who aren't paying attention. Of course, we run out of glasses eventually, at which point she'll approach me sotto voce "we seem to be out of glasses - could you wash a couple so we can pour the zinfandel?"

Maybe this should go in DTs?

If you're doing it in your house you do whatever you want.

One word: whisky. Liberal application. For you or MIL, your pick.

Wine glasses? Unless you have the various specific shapes, I'd shoot that idea down. Fresh glass only if a glass gets overly dirty from use.

Tell her three plates cracked last year, the day after TG, and you blame it on the baking.

Your mother in law sounds like a very gracious host. Of course, if this is your house, you set the rules, but when it comes to family issues, it's often easiest just to roll along.

You can always use the dishwasher to warm the plates. Mine has a "plate warmer" setting...

Originally Posted by Piobaire

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Tell her three plates cracked last year, the day after TG, and you blame it on the baking.

^^ Sadly, its probably the easiest thing. And make it pretty clear that you were really saddened by the loss of the plates and dont know that you could handle something happening to them this year (or to the wine glasses).

Maybe give her another job that she can do without getting in the way? Its possible that she was used to being mother hen for holidays and now that you are holding them at your place she feels like she is not needed so she finds ways to try and be "important".

Assign her to do something like get the kids fed, or whatever else wont get in the way.

K

Originally Posted by VKK3450

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Maybe give her another job that she can do without getting in the way?
Preferably far away from the kitchen.

Put her in charge of parking the cars.

Here's the question: How does your wife feel about all of this?

Originally Posted by Piobaire

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One word: whisky. Liberal application. For you or MIL, your pick.

Wine glasses? Unless you have the various specific shapes, I'd shoot that idea down. Fresh glass only if a glass gets overly dirty from use.

Tell her three plates cracked last year, the day after TG, and you blame it on the baking.

These are, of course, logical and good suggestions but easier said than done.

Originally Posted by bigbjorn

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Your mother in law sounds like a very gracious host. Of course, if this is your house, you set the rules, but when it comes to family issues, it's often easiest just to roll along.

Oh, I've been rolling for awhile!

Originally Posted by Dakota rube

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You can always use the dishwasher to warm the plates. Mine has a "plate warmer" setting...

, seems like a good idea, but ties up the dishwasher. Plus, it would be one more thing for me to do - either warming myself or trying to explain to MIL what to do.

Not worth the aggravation IMO, especially one day per year. I'd let her run the show and go with the flow - it sounds like she really enjoys that.

Originally Posted by gdl203

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Not worth the aggravation IMO, especially one day per year. I'd let her run the show and go with the flow - it sounds like she really enjoys that.

I agree with this. Normally I run the show in the kitchen, but if a family member gets validation by helping or doing some such, then I go along.

Have you considered asking her to wash the wine glasses she's so intent on replacing? I'm sure that would be a major help.

Originally Posted by romafan

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These are, of course, logical and good suggestions but easier said than done.

I hear you. Go with my first suggestion then.

So she seems to be putting plates in the oven and glasses in the sink, but neither takes the plates out for serving or washes the glasses. I would put her in charge of this entire realm, as someone suggested.

Originally Posted by Tarmac

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So she seems to be putting plates in the oven and glasses in the sink, but neither takes the plates out for serving or washes the glasses. I would put her in charge of this entire realm, as someone suggested.

Unfortunately this is a realm she will not occupy. I will be rolling with it for another year, I guess. Happy Thanksgiving all!

Originally Posted by Piobaire

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One word: whisky. Liberal application. For you or MIL, your pick.

Sounds like the best option. In all seriousness, it's one day per year so it may be best to get yourself a bottle and then just deal with it. I don't drink much, except at family functions.