Why no girls here?

[Don Carlos]

Originally Posted by Hombre Secreto

This thread went from interest in clothing to why this forum has no chicks... Pitiful.

No wonder women don't post here.

LOL.

Women don't post here because women don't generally want to hang out on a men's clothing forum. It has nothing to do with the posters here and everything to do with the subject matter. Good grief, man. Right now, I bet some tween girl is asking her fellow Twilight Fan Club board members why boys never post there, and I'm sure someone is suggesting that it's because the board's population hates men.

 

[Hombre Secreto]

Originally Posted by Arrogant Bastard

LOL. Women don't post here because women don't generally want to hang out on a men's clothing forum. It has nothing to do with the posters here and everything to do with the subject matter. Good grief, man.
The best sections here are the non-clothing ones. Clothing isn't exclusive here.

 

[Mark from Plano]

Originally Posted by Arrogant Bastard

LOL.

Women don't post here because women don't generally want to hang out on a men's clothing forum. It has nothing to do with the posters here and everything to do with the subject matter. Good grief, man. Right now, I bet some tween girl is asking her fellow Twilight Fan Club board members why boys never post there, and I'm sure someone is suggesting that it's because the board's population hates men.

Right. The very name of the forum, Men's Styleforum, should have been her first clue.



Oh...wait...nevermind.

 

[Davidko19]

well, if she was truly interested forum you guys completely drove her off with the last 3 pages of "This is why we cant have nice things" white knighting bull ****.

If you just left it be instead of putting in your $.02 about giving it a chance it woulda revealed itself. Now, it just looks pathetic.

btw: any one posting anywhere (esp a woman posting in a mans forum) knows some trolling and lulz will happen. Esp when you put up a picture of yourself without question. hmmm....

 

[Don Carlos]

Originally Posted by Mark from Plano

Right. The very name of the forum, Men's Styleforum, should have been her first clue.



Oh...wait...nevermind.

:roma:

Are you really putting forth the argument that people can't tell at first glance that this is a men's forum? Really? That's the leg you want to stand on? I'll give you a minute to reconsider, because el oh el.

 

[Mark from Plano]

Originally Posted by Arrogant Bastard

:roma:

Are you really putting forth the argument that people can't tell at first glance that this is a men's forum? Really? That's the leg you want to stand on? I'll give you a minute to reconsider, because el oh el.

Nah...not really. Perhaps that's why the OP in this thread was her asking why there were no women on here.

What I am saying is that women do post here from time to time and often turn this place up because they're either (a) looking for a place to discuss clothing and find little for women in that regard, or (b) have some interest in mens' clothing (boyfriend, husband, whatever).

Whatever. I'm sure you're right. We should never give anyone the benefit of the doubt.

 

[legorogel]

hello

 

[Manton]

Well, we have some females here--very few. In order to get to the point where members speak to them and listen to what they have to say, they had to endure a lot of BS. Very few will ever stick around long enough to get to that point. Maybe that's unchangeable, but it's unfortunate if so.

 

[Don Carlos]

Originally Posted by Mark from Plano

Nah...not really. Perhaps that's why the OP in this thread was her asking why there were no women on here.

Whatever. I'm sure you're right. We should never give anyone the benefit of the doubt.

Strawman alert.

Listen, it's not about giving or not giving people the benefit of the doubt. It's about treating everyone equally. None of this white-knight bullshit. None of this "ZOMG, it's a girl!!! hey gais, bee nice 2 her or we'll scare her away!!!11" bullshit.

If you really wanted to be respectful of women, you'd treat them like every other human being and not put them on some kind of bizarre pedestal. That's all I'm trying to say. That, and the fact that a first post that includes pictures and is centered on the concept of being a girl = highly suspicious.

Give women some intellectual credit. Most real women don't burst onto the scene and call attention to their femininity, let alone post pics to stir up attention. And those who do are usually annoying at best, or men at worst.

Originally Posted by Manton

Well, we have some females here--very few. In order to get to the point where members speak to them and listen to what they have to say, they had to endure a lot of BS. Very few will ever stick around long enough to get to that point. Maybe that's unchangeable, but it's unfortunate if so.

I agree with you here. Some BS and trollery is going to be inevitable when women enter the community. But that BS cuts both ways: both on the catcalling/trolling side of the coin, and on the internet-white-knight side of the coin. If people didn't engage in either behavior, women would feel a lot more welcome. If women were treated as people and not as mystical beings, they'd feel more comfortable here.

 

[countdemoney]

I'm not sure what the "expose the troll" approach achieves. I look at this as a variation on Pascal's wager. Trolls troll to get a reaction. If spb is a troll, she'll have to escalate and that ultimately increases the lulz . If not a troll, we have a new member who might ultimately add something. There's no cost to kindness, or, at minimum, politeness.

A note on pictures. Some cultures do place a premium on personal interaction and you will almost immediately receive a picture of an individual if you work together and have not yet met in person.

 

[Douglas]

Originally Posted by Arrogant Bastard

I love you, man, but for someone who's been on a message board as long as you have, you should be well aware of how the entrance of an (alleged) female into the community usually goes.

1) Girl shows up.
2) 50% of the guys fawn all over her.
3) 50% of the guys think it's a trap and troll the thread.
4) 95% of the time, girl eventually reveals herself as, or is revealed unintentionally, as a dude.
5) Rinse and repeat.

Call me cynical if you will. But I've been on the internet -- and, in particular, in some male-dominated internet communities -- long enough to know how this scenario almost always plays itself out.

First, you're wrong on 2-3. It's more like

10% fawn all over her.
20% troll the thread.
10% troll the thread really offensively.
60% try to treat her like they'd treat any other new member, irrespective of their sex.

You're probably right in that 95% of the time it is a trap or troll, but that is only because the 30% trolling incent more traps and trolls. It's the 60% who have to try to stamp out the trolling and not just sit idly by, or the cycle perpetuates.

In that regard, it's a bit like the Izlamz.

OK, now I'm trolling, but unlike with wimminz, there is no shortage of muzlins/muzlin apologists on here.

 

[Mark from Plano]

Originally Posted by Arrogant Bastard

Strawman alert.

Listen, it's not about giving or not giving people the benefit of the doubt. It's about treating everyone equally. None of this white-knight bullshit. None of this "ZOMG, it's a girl!!! hey gais, bee nice 2 her or we'll scare her away!!!11" bullshit.

If you really wanted to be respectful of women, you'd treat them like every other human being and not put them on some kind of bizarre pedestal. That's all I'm trying to say. That, and the fact that a first post that includes pictures and is centered on the concept of being a girl = highly suspicious.

Give women some intellectual credit. Most real women don't burst onto the scene and call attention to their femininity, let alone post pics to stir up attention. And those who do are usually annoying at best, or men at worst.

OK...let's use that standard. Some new guy comes on here and posts an interest and says, basically, nothing controversial. Is he directed to post photos in GHM (or whatever)?

Nobody's putting anyone on a pedestal, bizzare or otherwise, but if you think that women on here are treated equally to men, or that the environment here is inviting for women to participate, then I have some lovely Lousiana swampland I think you might be interested in.

As for her picture or whether or not she's a dude, you may be right, but you are simply making the mistake of saying that because someone did this in the past, it's certain that's what's happening this time.

Whatever, you guys have fun, I'm done in this thread.

 

[Don Carlos]

Cool, well, either way, I've said my piece. If she is a real woman, fantastic. I look forward to her contributions. If she's not, I look forward to the lulz. Either way, I'm happy.

 

[Manton]

1) This is not just a female issue. It's a noob issue. We tend to bury all noobs with snark and inside jokes. Noobs with boobs get it a lot worse but the dynamic is not fundamentally different.

2) I don't think it's necessarily a red flag if a girl were to say "I'm a girl" her first time here because it becomes very obvious that this place is nearly all guys. Yet it's not about sports or war or computing (things 99% of girls don't care about) but about style and clothes (things 99% of girls DO care about), so it seems inevitable to me that some females will be curious about the forum, notice that it's virtually all male, and then wonder where they might fit in.

 

[Joffrey]

Bets on when this thread is locked or squirreled? I say it won't see past the July 4 weekend.