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American Crew Fiber.
There have probably been tens of threads made on this topic... you might want to try using the search function next time.
Just look for waxes, clays, and maybe some pastes. Some popular brands are Sebastian, American Crew, Redken, and Aveda among many others. Just search the forum.
PS - The key is in the shampoo and conditioner. Shampoo everynight before bed, and condition accordingly. Shampoo should be matched to your scalp type - Dry, Oily, Medium.
I've always heard that it's best to wash your hair only a few times a week. I guess it depends on your hair type more than anything, but if you're hair feels dry then don't wash it. Of course, if you're going to be using a lot of product, then it might not matter anyways.