How to stop overdressing

[Chaconne]

It is with a heavy heart that I admit that I may have been overdressing.

I live in a major European capital and work in a fairly informal sector. I find that I am less and less able to get away with what used to be my go-to assembly of blazers and tweed coats, shetland jumpers, oxford shirts, flannels, and suede shoes.
While I realise that this is, by the standards of this forum, a fairly informal baseline, it simply no longer is in my surroundings. As dress codes are shifting, I am constantly outdressing my peers and am drawing unwanted attention of the wrong kind, being read as stuck-up and conservative rather than simply well-dressed.

Naturally, the question is now: what is to be done?

Giving up entirely and retreating into business-casual (or just casual really) obviously is no option. Instead I have been trying to take style cues from different directions:

• 80s/90s yuppie style: thinking Giorgio Armani and New York, with fairly formal clothes mixed in such a way as to modernise them (trainers) and interesting silhoutes making outfits less conservative.
• The mysterious French ivy: hard to characterise. Also mixing different formality levels (jeans!) and utilising clashing colours (black shoes, bright jumpers).

Any more ideas? Visual inspiration welcome.

I remember reading some related discussion here (was it in the informal 'wearing Oxfords casually' that someone gave the interesting advice to always mix one more informal item into one's outfit?), but don't know of a single place where such thoughts are compiled. Hoping that this thread can serve as such. I might be posting some images if I have the time.

WAYWRN: Classic Menswear, Casual Style

Each to his own. My style is also naturally more casual than the typical SF poster in this thread, but IMO expressing your personality and dressing appropriately for your environment aren't mutually exclusive. I'm not uncomfortable wearing a sport coat with jeans, a tuxedo, board shorts...

www.styleforum.net

You might get some inspiration from this thread. A lot of good classic casual in there.

 

[jellyroller]

I'll chime in by suggesting that you wear what makes you comfortable. And I don't mean rock a pair of sweatpants to the office. If it makes you uncomfortable to wear a three piece suit because you'll inevitably look overdressed and out of place in comparison to your co-workers, tone it down. Think flannel trousers, button down shirt, soft shouldered sport coat or cardigan. Suede shoes or penny loafers instead of sharply chiseled oxfords. Leave the cufflinks and pocket squares at home. It's entirely possible to look good and feel confident without sticking out / looking like you're trying too hard.

I've found this article by Simon Crompton to be instructive:

Permanent Style

Which office are you? (Or, a sliding scale of formality)

www.permanentstyle.com

 

[krudsma]

I'll jump in here because I too work in an industry where there is absolutely no use for tailoring and I've had to find a way to wear it that makes me feel comfortable and not overdressed. I know it's easy to say "just wear what you want, to hell with 'em", but emotional comfort comes not just from knowing that you're dressed well but that you're dressed appropriately for your surroundings.

Jeans are the obvious answer - I find Levi's 1947 501s in a dark or mid wash to be really useful, especially with penny loafers. Vintage Wrangler Cowboy Cuts also have a perfect silhouette for tailoring - high rise, very straight cut, and a decent leg opening (very smartphone-unfriendly pockets, though). Then a tweed or corduroy sportcoat and an ocbd with one extra button undone. Non-traditional pants (like painters or fatigues, if your workplace is casual enough to allow it) can also be fun if they feel cohesive with the rest of the outfit.

Ethan Wong's Blog has been mentioned before as a reference for wearing tailoring in an approachable way and I think there's a lot of good inspo there. Some of his stuff can lean very "period accurate" but he wears a lot of nice casual, creative stuff as well.

Here's a few things that might be helpful references.

 

[ppk]

I live in Silicon Valley, probably the zenith of casual - not just business casual. I refuse to dress down. I don't wear suits very often, but I do wear a lot of slacks, sport coats, ties and pocket squares. Very few people dress like me.

I do get the "Man, you're dressed up" comments, but I take it as a compliment, though it's not always delivered in that spirit. It's my form of self-expression.

I can't paint, or draw or sculpt, but I have learned to express myself sartorially. There's always more to learn and master, so it's something that I'm going to continue to pursue.

 

[DorianGreen]

I'll jump in here because I too work in an industry where there is absolutely no use for tailoring and I've had to find a way to wear it that makes me feel comfortable and not overdressed. I know it's easy to say "just wear what you want, to hell with 'em", but emotional comfort comes not just from knowing that you're dressed well but that you're dressed appropriately for your surroundings.

Jeans are the obvious answer - I find Levi's 1947 501s in a dark or mid wash to be really useful, especially with penny loafers. Vintage Wrangler Cowboy Cuts also have a perfect silhouette for tailoring - high rise, very straight cut, and a decent leg opening (very smartphone-unfriendly pockets, though). Then a tweed or corduroy sportcoat and an ocbd with one extra button undone. Non-traditional pants (like painters or fatigues, if your workplace is casual enough to allow it) can also be fun if they feel cohesive with the rest of the outfit.

Ethan Wong's Blog has been mentioned before as a reference for wearing tailoring in an approachable way and I think there's a lot of good inspo there. Some of his stuff can lean very "period accurate" but he wears a lot of nice casual, creative stuff as well.

Here's a few things that might be helpful references.


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I get your point, but disagree. I will object that if you feel overdressed, it means that it's not your style, the true expression of your taste and personality: you are just trying to show that look, but it's not you yourself, so you can't be confident and therefore give excessive importance to how you are seen by others.

Of course, I'm speaking of the case in which everybody in the surrounding is free to dress the way they like, where the profession does not dictate dress rules, because of which you would look inappropriate dressing in a certain way.

 

[mak1277]

I get your point, but disagree. I will object that if you feel overdressed, it means that it's not your style, the true expression of your taste and personality: you are just trying to show that look, but it's not you yourself, so you can't be confident and therefore give excessive importance to how you are seen by others.

Of course, I'm speaking of the case in which everybody in the surrounding is free to dress the way they like, where the profession does not dictate dress rules, because of which you would look inappropriate dressing in a certain way.

It’s all well and good to dress how you like, but if all your peers are in sneakers and tshirts and you’re wearing a jacket and tie, people are going to think you’re a stooge and that’s not a good way to be at the office. Save your self expression for personal time.

 

[krudsma]

I get your point, but disagree. I will object that if you feel overdressed, it means that it's not your style, the true expression of your taste and personality: you are just trying to show that look, but it's not you yourself, so you can't be confident and therefore give excessive importance to how you are seen by others.

Of course, I'm speaking of the case in which everybody in the surrounding is free to dress the way they like, where the profession does not dictate dress rules, because of which you would look inappropriate dressing in a certain way.

I think work life and non-work life are different stories though. I don't feel overdressed wearing a suit out to dinner or going out for the day or whatever. But the way your clothing makes your co-workers feel is non-trivial. I've seen people say things like "if what I wear makes people feel underdressed, that's their problem", but if the OP is worried that his clothing is alienating his co-workers then it could very much be a problem for him career-wise, even if a sportcoat and trousers feel like an authentic expression of his style. It likely isn't as dramatic as that, but thinking about how people perceive you is kind of part-and-parcel with an interest in clothing in the first place.

 

[Son Of Saphir]

To the OP,
did you start dressing well recently in this job?

Truth be told....
you can dress well among slobs (hat and all) and no-one should give it a second thought if you feel comfortable in your own skin.
When you dress well people should feel at ease around you.

Your wonderful personality should shine through.
If people are getting the wrong impression of you, there is something wrong.
Maybe dressing well is new to you??...if so no problem, just tone it down a bit and build it up over time and let your coworkers get to know the real you.

Should you dress way down to please other people?
No way.

 

[mak1277]

you can dress well among slobs (hat and all) and no-one should give it a second thought if you feel comfortable in your own skin.

This is nice in theory but doesn’t work in practice. I worked for a decade in a business casual office where the “uniform” was wool/dress trousers and a button up shirt. I wore a sport coat almost every day. People I worked with for ten years would still ask me once a week why I was so dressed up.

 

[Son Of Saphir]

It’s all well and good to dress how you like, but if all your peers are in sneakers and tshirts and you’re wearing a jacket and tie, people are going to think you’re a stooge and that’s not a good way to be at the office. Save your self expression for personal time.

Doesn't have to be like that.
The co-workers will get used to your style if you are a down to earth and decent person.
Do things right and most people will like you for who you are.
No need for sneakers and tshirts,
that is just defeatist and giving up.

me different to most men,
but me like me for me,
and other people like me for me.

The fact that you doubt yourself show you don't know who you are yet.
You are not comfortable in your own skin yet.

Most people are too scared to stand out and do their own thing,
they want to conform (dress down) and be basically invisible.
It is such sad state of delusion (an imprisoned mindset) and they are unable to break out of it.

 

[mak1277]

Doesn't have to be like that.
The co-workers will get used to your style if you are a down to earth and decent person.
Do things right and most people will like you for who you are.
No need for sneakers and tshirts,
that is just defeatist and giving up.

me different to most men,
but me like me for me,
and other people like me for me.

The fact that you doubt yourself show you don't know who you are yet.
You are not comfortable in your own skin yet.

Most people are too scared to stand out and do their own thing,
they want to conform (dress down) and be basically invisible.
It is such sad state of delusion (an imprisoned mindset) and they are unable to break out of it.

I was the only person in the office wearing a sport coat for ten years. I certainly wasn’t afraid of standing out.

 

[SteveMc]

This is a good question. As much as I like to dress up, I also don't want to overdo it. it's just not who I am. For me the idea is to dress up, yes, people notice, yes. and yet at the same time kind of blend in and not stick as a sore thumb if you get my idea. This is a very fine line, which I personally deal with on a daily basis.

I've drafted some rules of thumb that works for me and my environment. Judging from the excellent examples above, I think this the way to go if you really keen on lightening things up.

Prefer non-patterned sport coats, especially guncheck which is deemed as old-fashioned. Unstructured, unlined sport coats also help for a more casual look.

Substitute the OCBD with a crew neck sweater or a denim shirt or a button-down shirt with a spread collar. A knitted t-shirt is also an option in the summer time (see first image above).

Suede shoes are sometimes even more fancy than calf skin because of the distinct texture. Calf skin or grain, which already gone through couple of years of wear is less noticeable than suede.

If you can't bring yourself to wear denim for the office (I know I can't), 5-pockets twill pants in neutral colors are a good alternative.

 

[Son Of Saphir]

Not over doing it is most important.
Dressing with ease is also important.
Should take 5 minutes to get dressed in the morning with little thought (takes time to develop that skill)

If you try too hard people might pick up on that vibe and they will wonder why you are so dressed up.
You shouldn't be thinking (effected) about by your clothes all the time during the day.
You should dress nice and feel good, then forget about your clothes and get on with your day, but sometimes you see your shoes or coat and think `that is a nice ****', feel happy and then forget about it again and get on with your day.

Maybe your clothes are wearing you instead of you wearing your clothes.
It can be difficult to transition from dressing down to dressing up.

 

[Philby]

I should have specified that I am not interested in encouragements or discussions about the decline of formal dress, as well meaning as these might be.

I am rather interested in ways to dress interesting without simply reverting to business casual shirt + chinos. There is the more workwear-Americana inspired path, but I just do not like jeans material. I think keeping the same items but shifting the colour scheme to dark or even black might also actually work and be more acceptable in the city, where an all black outfit is standard.

 

[DorianGreen]

Not over doing it is most important.
Dressing with ease is also important.
Should take 5 minutes to get dressed in the morning with little thought (takes time to develop that skill)

If you try too hard people might pick up on that vibe and they will wonder why you are so dressed up.
You shouldn't be thinking (effected) about by your clothes all the time during the day.
You should dress nice and feel good, then forget about your clothes and get on with your day, but sometimes you see your shoes or coat and think `that is a nice ****', feel happy and then forget about it again and get on with your day.

Maybe your clothes are wearing you instead of you wearing your clothes.
It can be difficult to transition from dressing down to dressing up.

Very well said. You have to dress well with nonchalance, with naturality, giving the impression of no effort. By the way, this is the true meaning of "sprezzatura", so often misunderstood.