Big relationship trouble!

[swisloc]

Originally Posted by Lucky Strike

I disagree - there's no disrespect inherent in casual sex. Shallowness, yes, but everything in life doesn't have to be profound. Of course, I'm Scandinavian, though.

i don't see why there has to be inherent disrespect OR shallowness involved in casual sex. one-night stands or casual sex with friends, both are possible (and reasonable) without disrespect, shallowness or guilt, as long as both parties are on the same page. Might not be possible at age 15, but trust me it can be both possible and fun!

the best way to get over someone is to get under someone...

 

[JetBlast]

I don't mean to discourage you but the truth is promises are broken more often than they're kept. At your age, I wouldn't be making any promises because things change a lot when you grow older. Believe it or not, it might just be you who will change your feelings about her.

No I know that a promise is never written in stone. I know some things will change, I am sure we will keep in touch but I'm not sure if anything will come of it.
You also bring up an interesting point by saying that I may be the one that changes; I'm not sure about that but I am definitely not ruling it out!

Kid, sounds to me like you need a Kickin' Chickin' session.

My parents would be less than pleased

I don't want to lose chances of being able to go out with a girl, much less complete quarantine to my house!

i don't see why there has to be inherent disrespect OR shallowness involved in casual sex. one-night stands or casual sex with friends, both are possible (and reasonable) without disrespect, shallowness or guilt, as long as both parties are on the same page. Might not be possible at age 15, but trust me it can be both possible and fun!

I see your point. It's not really possible (or legal) at age 15 but a one-night stand with someone you are close to is fine. I just wouldn't feel comfortable if I knew there was a girl that would be very pissed/hurt/sad/whatever that I would do that.

I also passed the girl in question in the hall at school today, she actually said hi so I feel just a tiny bit more comfortable than before.

Brian

 

[grimslade]

Originally Posted by imageWIS

I have no idea where the ref is from.

Jon.


Kids these days. No Kulcha.

It's from the kids in the parking lot of the convenience store in "Say Anything."

 

[JetBlast]

Ok you all must be getting seriously tired of this thread by now

I just thought I would update things a little bit. I am at work (library) now, so I go out on the floor with a cart of books and guess who is sitting doing her homework? Yes, her. Well it turns out she is sitting next to the shelf I need to get to, so I carry on business as usual even though my heart was pounding out of my chest. She says hi, I say hi and we talk for a little while. I jokingly asked her if she wanted still wanted me dead and she said no and smiled a little bit, and I told her that when she was done her work if she wanted to come out into the library and find me I would be working shelving books.
So about an hour or so later she is with one of her friends at the computers, she gets her stuff and leaves. She walks over to me and just says "I'm leaving, I'll see you tomorrow." She didn't sound mad or anything, she just sounded like herself normally. It was good to hear that again.

I still have some good memories of her following me around the shelves reading out of a Shakespeare book while I put books away though

Brian

 

[Drinkwaters]

Brian,

Don't move, don't do a thing, just revel in this moment because she knows now how big you are and will respect that. When she realizes that she has a friend who is there for her, she will find that most endearing.
Unfortunately, she knows more than you do at this time that she has a lot of life to lead before she can honestly commit to anyone.
Man, many songs have been composed of this scenario. You'll make it through and mark my words that one day you'll remember what we all said to you. It's hard to do, you must move on!

Best Regards,

Gary

 

[LA Guy]

Originally Posted by imageWIS

I have no idea where the ref is from.

Jon.

Here's a clue Jon. Number one of 5.

 

[LA Guy]

Originally Posted by j

Bitches, man!

To bring this thread into Styleforum context What I love about this is that he is dressed pretty much the same at 33. The soundtrack and the costuming for this film are both spectacular.

 

[Earthmover]

Originally Posted by grimslade

Kids these days. No Kulcha.

It's from the kids in the parking lot of the convenience store in "Say Anything."

To be a bit more precise, Lloyd Dobler referred to it as the local Gas N' Sip.

I have to say, I'm pretty sure at 15, I didn't have an off switch for such upswelling of emotions. I think the best is to give him his blessing while reserving the right to say "I told you so". In fact, thanks to the [stable servers and] internet, he can come back and be embarassed at who he was in a few years.

God speed. It seems inevitable that she'll break your heart, but you can't really stop it, can you?

 

[Get Smart]

well, that was a fun 7 pages to read.

sorry Brian, after reading it all and your latest post, you're not ever going to get anywhere with this girl...but I'm sure you won't stop trying. live and learn, hopefully you'll look back on this with some wisdom under you belt.

one thing I dont get is why 15 year olds want to be in serious relationships??? Life isn't a f'ing hallmark card. You need to date all kinds of chicks to find out who's the best type for you, and even then that will change with the years. You have your entire 20s to find a serious relationship, and even then, odds are you will have several before settling down...so dont be so quick to grow up and start planning kids already.

looking back, none of my successful relationships, where the feeling were mutual, were ever that hard. The ones where I was in your position NEVER worked out.

 

[LA Guy]

Yeah, good luck dude. Enjoy the ride. Well, in any case, and it probably seems like little consolation now, but you'll, if you are lucky, get to look back on this in 15 years and a littel nostalgic.

 

[JetBlast]

Don't move, don't do a thing, just revel in this moment because she knows now how big you are and will respect that. When she realizes that she has a friend who is there for her, she will find that most endearing.

I hope so.

Man, many songs have been composed of this scenario.

Yes, they all seem to be showing up on the radio around this time

one thing I dont get is why 15 year olds want to be in serious relationships??? Life isn't a f'ing hallmark card. You need to date all kinds of chicks to find out who's the best type for you, and even then that will change with the years. You have your entire 20s to find a serious relationship, and even then, odds are you will have several before settling down...so dont be so quick to grow up and start planning kids already.

I know I want to be because I am an emotional person who wants somebody to love. Yes I have my hobbies and interests to love but that isn't the same as a human being. I know life isn't a Hallmark card, if it was, none of this would have happened in the first place. I know that I should try different girls but I have never been able to get girls in the first place so I feel lucky that I have found one.

God speed. It seems inevitable that she'll break your heart, but you can't really stop it, can you?

No. There's nothing I can do.

Brian

 

[Drinkwaters]

Brian,
I now feel and I'm sure everyone who has chimed in on this one will say that you have a serious problem with denial of reality. Until you face the music on this one, you will be damaging your mental psyche on relationships and love. Although this happening in your life has effected your self esteem, you need to grasp the fact that love comes and goes and there is no way to control those forces. The more you try to make things happen as you have divised them to, the less they will occur. I and many others have had these experiences you are trying to overcome and we have all told you that it is fruitless. Save yourself from any furture damage and find Brian, who needs to learn to love himself first.

Gary

 

[Matt]

Originally Posted by drink8648

When she realizes that she has a friend who is there for her, she will find that most endearing.
...and then not sleep with you.

 

[JetBlast]

Gary,
I know I have a problem with not facing the facts in this situation. I am aware this is most likely not going to work out, she is too good for me anyway, but I just don't want that to happen. I prefer not to think about this ending even though I know what is going to happen.

You just watch, I'll get an invitation to her wedding in 10 years, and we'll see how I feel then.

Brian

 

[Matt]

Originally Posted by JetBlast

I'll get an invitation to her wedding in 10 years
In 10 years you will be sitting on whatever-the-2017-technological-equivalent-of-a-forum-is when some 15 year old shows up with a very similar story. You will recount this tale of woe to him...and he will respond "You just dont understand. With Us It's Different" Then he will proceed to make the same mistakes I did 15 yrs ago, and you are now. And you'll feel for the kid, shrug, and walk away. Feel for you kid. *shrug* Im done...good luck Brian.