How to stop overdressing

[AX2007]

…
Now, everyone is used to how I dress. I show up to my performances wearing a sport coat and no one bats an eye anymore.

Roll with it.

This right here. After a while, people just get accustomed to how you dress and it just is. Roll with it.

 

[Pascal1980]

Hi folks across the ocean to the West (from a European perspective ;-)),

here in Frankfurt, our financial capital, the dress coat has been "casualized" in that the mandatory tie is gone. Otherwise it is still for bankers, consultants (like me) and lawyers the "international" two-piece suit and "dress shoes". "Dress Shoes" in parantheses, because what most men consider shoes are the cemented cheap ones, which is not the issue, that unfortunately never see some shoe cream and polish. Just with my black or brown Heinrich-Dinkelacker dress derbies, polished up with a mirror gloss, I stand out like a torch in a hurricane. However, I would never dress down, because I and my colleague who also starts to enjoy it, get compliments from colleagues, male and female alike. We are also taken more seriously and respected. "Cloths still make people" as we say in German (literal translation is odd).

Yesterday my colleague Julian was the only man in a navy three-piece suit with a tie, pocket square and polished and mirror glosed dress shoes, also the Heinrich-Dinkelacker plain toe derbies at the opera. The woman gave him compliments and other men as well, as otherwise most wore casual jeans and at the cold outside their pullovers and parkas.

Hence here it is fully accepted to dress still more "business casual" in the office, and of course full suit for client visits, but a sweater and jogging pants is a no go! Otherwise business casual is fully o.k., or the "full wardrobe" of the three-piece suit with tie, pocket square and dress shoes.

Also in my leisure time the good jeans, dress shirt or roll-neck shirt, sports coat and dress boots (Chelsea-, George-, Balmoral-Boots) are my usual outfit. If I go "casual" the jeans with a classic jeans jacket from Levi's and my polished sneakers from full-grain leather are the go to outfit, or my beloved Chelsea boots. A leather jacket is also my most casual option. I hardly wear any sneakers anymore, but prefer polished dress boots.

I also like to dress up as I like to behave well to everybody. This comes naturally with being dressed up to me. At some occasions I want to stand out as I do not like how the people I am with treat for instance the waiter and waitresses at a restaurant, or come to the dinner table in a 5-star hotel ressort with their mobile phones being put on the table and being absored by WhatsApp instead of really starting a conversation with their mates. Maybe that is arrogant by me, but then I am happy to wear my blazer and dress shoes to dinner as I feel better.

Also what we observe here is that the few men and women who make snotty remarks about our dressed-up outfits are envious, as they either cannot afford it (even though it must not be expensive) or would like to dress-up, but do not know how, and lack self-esteem themselves.

Satorial regards from Germany

Pascal

 

[Kingstonian]

‘Heinrich-Dinkelacker dress derbies’

Are they the chunky shoes that go with Trachten? Or do they offer different styles to Budapester?

 

[Pascal1980]

Hello Kingstonian,

the sleeker lasts "Milano" (Italien style inspired) and "Luzern" (English style inspired) are not the chunky "Rio", "Buda" or "Janosh K" lasts by far. I like the Milano and most of my dress derbies are on that last, for instance the classic "captoe Oxford" on the Milano Last:

Milano Captoe BC - Schwarz

Der klassische Milano Captoe Oxford BC ist der ideale Begleiter für alle Gelegenheiten, bei denen es auf ein elegantes Auftreten ankommt. Handgefertigt aus feinem Boxcalf.

www.shoepassion.de

Or as the classic plan derby in Germany, the typical dress shoes one sees much more often than the Oxford:

Milano Plain BC - Schwarz

Vertrauen Sie Ihre Füße der original Budapester Handarbeit des Milano Leistens an, der hier gänzlich unverziert seine edlen Materialien offen präsentiert.

www.shoepassion.de

Best regards

Pascal

 

[Mirage-]

This right here. After a while, people just get accustomed to how you dress and it just is. Roll with it.

Yeah, absolutely. In fact they might even ask what's up if you ever dress down, if they're used to you dressing up.

Also (usually this is outside the office) when judging whether I am truly overdressed or not, I often mentally filter out men, since too many dress lazily simply because society decided they don't have to bother with it, and just assess my clothes with respect to the women, who often make an effort. Suddenly, I don't feel that overdressed anymore, in fact I feel like I am properly matching their effort while most other men are not.

 

[cantoryakov]

. "Cloths still make people" as we say in German (literal translation is odd).

We say that in English like this: “Clothes make the man”

 

[FlithyButler]

We say that in English like this: “Clothes make the man”

And that is itself a bastardised and falsely inverted form of it's actual origin;

"The cloth proclaimeth the man"

As you can see, the modern remnant of this saying entirely inverts the meaning, giving the misleading sense that clothing can make you into something - When the original simply states that wearing better cloth testifies to someone of noble standing (from a time when formal nobility was much more of a thing, and finer fabrics and fibers were relatively *much* more expensive/unreachable than now).

 

[cantoryakov]

And that is itself a bastardised and falsely inverted form of it's actual origin;

"The cloth proclaimeth the man"

As you can see, the modern remnant of this saying entirely inverts the meaning, giving the misleading sense that clothing can make you into something - When the original simply states that wearing better cloth testifies to someone of noble standing (from a time when formal nobility was much more of a thing, and finer fabrics and fibers were relatively *much* more expensive/unreachable than now).

in the tech-billionaire era, the cloth proclaimeth not very much at all

 

[ValidusLA]

When I first got into tailoring, I received occasional comments from the jeans and hoodies crew.

Now, everyone is used to how I dress. I show up to my performances wearing a sport coat and no one bats an eye anymore.

Roll with it.

This. I live in a very casual (maybe even sloppy) Los Angeles suburb. I wear a sportcoat and tie most days, rarely a suit now, but a tie is basically an alien object in my town these days. Everyone knows that's how I dress though, and I basically only get positive comments.

I even got an email from a professor friend the other day, quoted:

"Not too long ago, I was driving through Pasadena, and saw out of the corner of my eye that there was a man wearing a very proper jacket--I mostly just noticed the jacket--by the side of the road. "That must be Validus!" I said to myself, so I swiveled my head as I drove by, and, sure enough, voila, one Mr. Validus, a well-dressed gentleman cast adrift in a sea of cargo-short wearing barbarians."

This guys mostly wears cargo-shorts and is super casual - he's got 3 young kids so hard to blame him. Only douchebags and the insecure will criticize you for dressing well.

As someone said earlier in thread. Have some sartorial balls.

 

[cantoryakov]

...anyway, another option is to go full SW&D. you can wear jeans and a hoodie but still feel stylish because the jeans were $500 and the hoodie was $300

 

[sam67]

I'm a physical therapist. I was taking my client to a treatment area yesterday and some guy in the clinic I don't know said, 'you're overdressed!". As I walked into my treatment room with my client I said, 'I'm never overdressed'. I had a sport coat and tie on, dress shoes.

I recently heard Hugo Jacomet say on a pod cast that those that dress are now the 'rebels'. I'll take it.

 

[bicycleradical]

I recently head Hugo Jacomet say on a pod cast that those that dress are now the 'rebels'. I'll take it.

"Basically, the world of jeans and t-shirts, or that casual world became a horrible new establishment and my world of jackets and trousers became the anti-establishment." - Thom Browne

 

[corpseposeur]

I have a lot of thoughts and the overall premise of the thread is one that I have been considering as well. I live in New York and work in a casual office and my views are based on my experience in professional settings and social settings.

One solid way to upgrade your look without being the guy that overdresses, is to wear trousers that aren't jeans, but also not worsted wools. Some suggestions would be moleskins or corduroys for colder climates and linens, seersucker for warmer weathers. More than anything I've found these garments to be more comfortable than the default denim but can easily swap with jeans in terms of casual attire. If you wear your shirts tucked in, I recommend getting a higher waisted trousers. I find darker neutral colors (dark blues, navy, greys) are more flexible than khakis.

Jackets can verge on feeling more dressed up than you may want to be but, tweeds, cords, cottons aren't something that would count as very formal.

In colder climates a nice crew neck or v-neck sweater can come in handy. J Press and O'Connell's have nice pieces. I think overcoats are an area where you can still substitute a parka for a vintage overcoat. I have a bunch of vintage eBay treasures including a handmade Oxxford camelhair polo coat, two Oxxford cashmeres made of the plushest cloth ever and a heavy US-made 20-24oz herringbone tweed balmacaan. It seems like overcoats are one area where tailored clothing doesn't have to feel over the top.

Perhaps instead of black calfskin shoes, dark brown suede chukka boots or chelsea boots or suede loafers.

In aggregate, it is unlikely you will find yourself overdressed but you'll look well put together and you can keep the glen check three piece suit for a special occasion.

 

[smittycl]

I have a lot of thoughts and the overall premise of the thread is one that I have been considering as well. I live in New York and work in a casual office and my views are based on my experience in professional settings and social settings.

One solid way to upgrade your look without being the guy that overdresses, is to wear trousers that aren't jeans, but also not worsted wools. Some suggestions would be moleskins or corduroys for colder climates and linens, seersucker for warmer weathers. More than anything I've found these garments to be more comfortable than the default denim but can easily swap with jeans in terms of casual attire. If you wear your shirts tucked in, I recommend getting a higher waisted trousers. I find darker neutral colors (dark blues, navy, greys) are more flexible than khakis.

Jackets can verge on feeling more dressed up than you may want to be but, tweeds, cords, cottons aren't something that would count as very formal.

In colder climates a nice crew neck or v-neck sweater can come in handy. J Press and O'Connell's have nice pieces. I think overcoats are an area where you can still substitute a parka for a vintage overcoat. I have a bunch of vintage eBay treasures including a handmade Oxxford camelhair polo coat, two Oxxford cashmeres made of the plushest cloth ever and a heavy US-made 20-24oz herringbone tweed balmacaan. It seems like overcoats are one area where tailored clothing doesn't have to feel over the top.

Perhaps instead of black calfskin shoes, dark brown suede chukka boots or chelsea boots or suede loafers.

In aggregate, it is unlikely you will find yourself overdressed but you'll look well put together and you can keep the glen check three piece suit for a special occasion.

Good advice overall!

I wear linen pants in warmer weather and flannel as soon as it cools. Polo sweaters of varying thickness along with loafers (leather or suede) or Chelsea boots depending on the weather.

Casual day at work today so it's wool flannel sport coat (NMWA x Carrara), dress shirt (Zegna), wool/cash tie (Bigi), flannel trousers (Canali), and leather Chelsea boots (C&J).

I still see nothing wrong, despite the pearl clutching throughout this thread, with mixing in overshirts, shirt jackets, or chore coats as desired. I just won't do that at work. I typically don't wear jeans either unless wifey insists.

Just got this from NMWA sale. Went XL for looser fit:

Labura chore coat in grey and cream herringbone brushed wool

"The customer-favorite style returns with some sartorial swagger. Tonal herringbone lets this shirt-jacket fill the role of your usual sportcoat, so you'll still look sharp while safely skirting the barrage of "Why are you so dressed up?" comments at casual get togethers."---Ludwin Details 100%...

nomanwalksalone.com

 

[Leiito]

I feel similar, the world has gone sweatpants and it's harder to connect with people if you stand out too much. I've stopped wearing pocket squares, I now see them almost like bow ties, if I wear a tie it's wool or cashmere, increasingly reaching for knitwear, lately I like a a chunky grey turtleneck (Salvatore Piccolo and Altea) with dark brown Valstar down padded suede jacket, navy slacks and suede Chelsea boots, I'm mostly wearing button down shirts, often with cardigans. I find in general that quality knitwear nicely bridges levels of formality.

As for tailoring, I'm looking to shift my wardrobe towards more casual, Neapolitan blazers, more textured fabrics, super soft shoulders, not too drapey, 1/4 lined, open quarters, suits and Oxfords reserved for formal events and super important meetings.