No worries; on an intellectual level I pretty much agree with you. There is no doubt that I am an atheist, and this should preclude me from belonging to most, if not all, religions.
I was raised in as a Hicksite Quaker, so it was far closer to a philosophical upbringing than a religious one. In many respects, Quakerism is Christian only genetically. Some Quakers (according to Wikipedia, at least), question whether or not they should even consider themselves Christian anymore. I was never taught that Jesus died for our sins, or that he was the son of God, or that he performed miracles. I wasn't taught otherwise either...just that such things were of relative unimportance. I was always taught that he was a righteous man who lived a virtuous life, one which should serve as an example for myself and others.
The belief in God was always secondary to the belief of the inherent goodness and social responsibility of humanity. Quakers, including myself at one point, attribute this to "that of God" inside us, but the actions it led to were always more important than the source. Like I mentioned earlier, my father was clerk of our church (though Quaker churches are actually referred to as meetings...I'm just saying church because it's easier) despite being openly atheist. He, however, never considered himself a Quaker, which posed no problem to those who elected him.
Both my philosophy and morality are Quaker, and my philosophy and morality didn't change even slightly when I moved from someone who believes in God to someone who doesn't.
In the end, I don't know if I am a Quaker or not. But I don't think atheism is inherently contradictory to Quakerism. Atheism seems to be more about not believing in any sort of higher power; religion doesn't enter into it. Buddhists, for example, are arguably atheists.
I don't think there is any branch of Christianity where the role of God is so diminished as it is in Quakerism (at least, Hicksite Quakerism). So while you may hear such things a lot, unless you are hearing it from Quakers, it's a bit different. A good question would be: is Hicksite Quakerism, as practiced today, Christian in anything more than its heritage?
I am, for the most part, a pacifist. I will not insult people (this is a form of violence) nor will I physically assault another. I say for the most part because a do think that war, while always evil, is sometimes necessary. And if someone else were being hurt and the only way to save them is to hurt the attacker, then I think I would (because my own personal morality is my choice, and it shouldn't be imposed on others to their detriment). This fact is more damning to my case as a Quaker than my atheism.
I believe that there is an inherent goodness in all people, and that through meditation and self-reflection we can get in touch with that goodness and allow it to dictate how we interact with the world around us. This is the central tenet of Quakerism and is what determines how Quakers actually practice their faith.
The tl;dr summary:
To be philosophically Quaker carries more meaning than to be philosophically Catholic or Methodist or Baptist simply because Quakerism is less about God and more about philosophy and action than other faiths.
[EDIT]: Hicksites are one of the main branches of Quakerism, but the others are far more in line with traditional Christianity, so what I was raised in is different from what Evangelical Quakers and Conservative Quakers are
Edited by Claghorn - 12/20/12 at 8:14pm