College Frats (opinions? experiences?)

Originally Posted by iammatt

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which house?

asdf.. edit

I'm not sure I want to bone any sorority-type chicks.

The ethnic fraternities and sororities are the worst. I'm particularly ashamed of the Chinese ones. At some universities there are so damn many Chinese that the Taiwanese have their own segregated frats. I suppose they don't believe that Taiwan is a province of P.R. China.

At UT?

I was in grad school there a few years ago.

One potential virtue of a frat at UT is that it gives you an island of community in a giant sea of undergrads. I think UT has the largest single campus enrollment in the US... about 50K.

I had fun when I was in a frat house in undergrad (the "frat vs. "fraternity" thing is new to me, I used the terms interchangeably). Just remember not to let the frat activities overpower your school work. At the end of the day, you're there to study. However, take full advantage of the social life and the connections while you're there. The amount of (young and legal) tails you see there you won't ever see again in your life.

Originally Posted by vanity

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It helped shape most of my character, which outside of the forum, is actually a pretty well-respected one.

If you want to go to the parties, you can always crash them, though it is hard to get into the exclusive events like social dances, etc, you'd have to date a sorority chick to get into one of those, which, if you like "Strappy Sandal Daze" might be alright.

I would never join a frat, even the dorky pre-med or engineering ones at my school. I always felt like most the people were in frat[ernities] because they were so boring that they needed to buy friends. I had much more fun living with a group of close friends in an apartment and having fun that way.

Something is to be said for the networking you get for joining a frat. I have never needed it because I'm very good at what I do and don't like the feeling of owing people, but for some I'm sure it helps out. I wouldn't do it for the networking though, just be great at what you do. I worked at UPS, which is kind of its own frat at the corporate level, many former colelge bros there too, the people were kinda dumber than I thought they would be, kind of a sports bar crowd.

But, if you still want to join, be sure to prepare for the "Circle of Triumph" where you have to stand naked in a circle and do a reach around while the guy behind you sticks his thumb up your bum.

Originally Posted by zjpj83

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Personally, I would rather have my organs surgically removed from my body and be strangled with them, but I guess you make your own decisions in life.

I agree with these sentiments. I didn't need the leadership, camaraderie, or structure, and I didn't really like a majority of the people in the organization when they were together. Individually, they could be cool (when not talking about their house, which was only 10% of the time), but when you put them together, they were usually pretty obnoxious.

The university I went to has one of the largest total greek populations of any college (self-proclaimed #1, but I don't know if I believe it), and the school was split pretty heavily. There were the greek bars and non-greek bars. Your friends were either greek or they weren't. I had a great experience without it, and wouldn't change anything about my decisions.

Originally Posted by briancl

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I agree with these sentiments. I didn't need the leadership, camaraderie, or structure, and I didn't really like a majority of the people in the organization when they were together. Individually, they could be cool (when not talking about their house, which was only 10% of the time), but when you put them together, they were usually pretty obnoxious.

The university I went to has one of the largest total greek populations of any college (self-proclaimed #1, but I don't know if I believe it), and the school was split pretty heavily. There were the greek bars and non-greek bars. Your friends were either greek or they weren't. I had a great experience without it, and wouldn't change anything about my decisions.

Oh, and while my experiences were pretty negative, my girlfriend was in a sorority as a small private school, from what I can tell, the system and segregation and negative stereotypes are entirely different. This has been corroborated by discussions I've had with fellow Big Ten alum (they agree with my synopsis) and small private school alum (they agree with my girlfriend's experience, regardless of if they were actually greek).

At least I am not the only one that finds the whole thing as a bad joke ( I restrained myself from commenting). And the best reason for an international campaign to make people realise we are Hellenes (hate the spelling ) not greeks
My sentiments were basically I did not need any sort of living with a group of guys experience, I was a conscript for over two years and the stupid initiation bullshit sounded like a bunch of children playing army. Considering the real training (and hazing) some of my friends went through in their units, the idea of some spiky haired cretin trying to pull some of that frat **** on me would have made me wish I had my bayonet or at the very least decked one of them ...

For those that enjoyed your experience, good for you though.

The quality of your fraternity experience is completely up to you. Some people join a fraternity so that they have drinking buddies for the next 4 years. Others join fraternities so that they can become more involved in campus activities or campus politics. I suspect that most people join for some combination of these reasons.

College is a pretty important time for your personal development as a human being. Some fraternities will encourage this development. Others will not. I strongly encourage you to research all of the fraternities at your school and find the one that best fits your personality and will help you reach your goals (personal, professional, or otherwise). These are going to be the people that you associate with (and with whom you are associated) for the next few years.

The worst thing that you can do is to just join a fraternity because it was the only one that gave you a bid. Do your homework and make sure that you are making the best choice for you. Talk to other people that have experience with the greek community at your school. Find out about the reputation of the organization that you wish to join before you join it (especially its reputation amongst the female population...you might think twice about joining the "creppy guy fraternity").

For what it's worth, joining a fraternity was one of the best decisions that I have ever made. Five years after graduation, I still talk to 5-10 members of my fraternity on a daily basis. 30-40 of us get together for a reunion in a different city every summer. All of the groomsmen at my wedding were from my fraternity. Choose wisely, and you will make friends for life.

Getting off of my soapbox now...

DR's post is right on the money.

Deleted.

I attended both small (under 1,000) and large (over 30,000) schools

At small schools they are often the only social outlet and you're more likely to find regular guys there.

At the big schools I attended, I didn't see any reason for their existence. While some of my best friends were members (Sig Ep at Michigan) I met more dickheads than I could count. YMMV and all that.

To each his own. It's pretty easy to gauge whether you'd like to join a house by visiting, asking around, and deciding whether they are cheeseball assholes or simply guys who like to hang out. Of course, I don't know you, and you might prefer people I might not like, of course.

Join,but be sure to make friends outside of it as well.

I don't know if I could live with myself if I had chosen to buy my friends during college.

It's an amazing time of self-discovery and growth as an individual. You'll have your fun whether you're a frat boy or not. But to choose the safety of conformity, rather than challenging yourself and gaining personal independence and strength -- I don't think so.