Originally Posted by Thomas
I was just thinking about my dad when this example came up. He never drinks, and my mom seldom has more than a glass of wine (I think my boozer gene skipped that generation, but whatev). But they had these new-ish friends who insisted on going to dinner and getting multiple bottles of wine 'for the table' - expensive wine, at that - and my folks just played along, split the bill evenly, but my dad seethed about it. For a while, at least - we were talking about it one evening, and it came out that he didn't like these friends all that much in the first place, and he put a stop to the dinners out. I don't think they see those particular friends any more. I know they dont miss them.
Kind of a similar situation. My mother does not drink. She will sometimes have a glass on a special occasion when we force her to but otherwise no alcohol touches her lips. She has a bunch of lady friends that go out at least once/month to celebrate each other's birthdays. Some of them like to drink; a lot! They tend to split the tab evenly (person whose birthday it is obviously doesn't pay) and despite the fact that my mom is a very generous person who does a ton of charity work and who I sometimes have to "yell" at cause I think she gets taken advantage of because of how good-natured she is, she's mentioned it to me more than once that she "doesn't think it's fair that she has to pay for other people's drinks" when her own tab is so much smaller.
The difference is that my mother does like these people so she continues to go along with it but I think that it's a bunch of BS that they don't take note of this fact. Certainly, if I had a friend in the group who doesn't drink, I wouldn't expect him/her to contribute to my tab.