The Urban, Cosmopolitan, Elitist/Middle American Divide

Originally Posted by celery

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My family has constantly travelled and I've lived all sorts of places and visited even more. I've always seen myself as an international rather than an American (as I am a citizen) or a Greek (as both my parents are Greek) or Israeli (as I was born in Jerusalem).


I do love the urban environment, but at the same time I love a laid back small town feel. Not American small town, but more like Dole, France.

It really depends on the type of people I guess. People and surroundings to be more precise. In America, small town usually means "poor and uneducated" as opposed to quaint, traditional and relaxing that you might more easily find in another Country.

However, I may be ignorant to most American towns and cities as I have not been to many places in the States.

An American (citizen), an Englishman (born), an Indian (ancestors) and Kenyan (raised)

And I agree with your second point, however I do very much like the cosmopolitan scene, as I went through my rebellious years in suburbia and now I don't like it much

Originally Posted by RJman

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It's a continuum.
I agree with this. "Divide", "they vs. us", and other binary catch phrases are manufactured by either the media or politicians looking to benefit from the fear, contempt or hatred associated with such concepts. There's a continuum of lifestyles from a metropolis to a rural lifestyle, including big towns, small towns, suburbs, etc...

Different people choose different environments that fit their personalities at a specific time in their lives. There's no way I could be convinced to live in subrubia at this stage of my life; and there are plenty who think I'm crazy to pay the silly money I pay to live in this dirty, urban mess that is New York City

My brother and I are stark contrasts in terms of suburban versus ubran.

He is engrossed in high school--absolutely loves it. All the little drama, going to his first party where there's drinking, watching every high school basketball game, and knowing everyone in the town. He doesn't really talk to act like he is ambitious, other than what he's doing in sports. I guess he's ambitious enough to make sure he's an insurance salesman or something equally stereotypical of a suburban white male. He wants a wife, kids, a diet of meat and potatoes and nothing too crazy, drive an SUV, and have a few beers every Sunday while watching football. I don't mean to paint him negatively, it's just that he is happy where he is right now.

I never gave a **** about any of that. Personally, I wanted to get out into the city. I wanted to meet people with the same mindset I had. I wanted to meet women who didn't sell corn every summer while listening to Kenny Chesney. I wanted to eat food that was different, explore different celebrations going on, and actually use my weekends to do things rather than sit around and watch five hours of sports pre-game. What I wanted to do in the city--I wasn't quite sure because I wasn't exposed to enough in my childhood, and I could feel that. But I knew I wanted to get out of the burbs. And now I love going to school in the city--I've found what kind of foods I like, what kind of women I like, what kind of sports I like, and I've figured out what I want to do in life.

I can hardly say this is how it is with all suburban versus urban people, but my brother and I fight like there is no tomorrow now. It never used to be like this, but we are so different now that we find nothing else to talk about with each other besides arguing where to eat when we go on vacation. Let's just say I didn't get to eat at a single Italian restaurant in Northie Boston while I was on a family vacation because of him--instead, we ate at Cheesecake factory, and when I ordered the four cheese pasta, he mentioned that "at least he got his authentic Italian fix now" in a completely serious tone, and he gave me a completely confused look when I rolled my eyes at him. Ignorant, stupid **** like that sums up why I can't live in the suburbs anymore, because there are so may other people who probably would have said the same thing.

There is a big difference between Urban>Suburban>Rural. Personally I can only appreciate the urban and rural settings. Suburban is like an early death.

Pretty much agreed -- Suburbia as such is the epitome of the 'little boxes, on the hillside, little boxes made of ticky tacky and they're all just the same.' Suburbia is adrift and lost. Rural knows itself and understands itself and is only confused with the assault of suburbia.

I live rural but vacation urban and operate in both spheres, differently. Those who only know my urbane facets have difficulty conceiving that I wear jeans and drive a tractor at home. Those who know my rural facets would probably stop talking about me if they knew where I ate and how much I paid for my drinks when I'm away. There is a divide. The urban patronizes the rural; the rural distrusts the urban. It's really unfortunate, but in the end the divide exists because everyone thinks they're so damn smart.

~ Huntsman

Having grown up in suburbia, I will say that it was awesome to live less than a 5 minute walk from the stables where my family's horses were kept, and also live only a 30 minute drive from the inner-city. I was able to see many, many aspects of life. I know both urban and rural and understand them both fluently because of my background. Now, I'm not saying I know what its like to live in NYC or North Dakota....but I'm as close to both (and everything in-between) as one can get.

Originally Posted by apocalypse later

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I can hardly say this is how it is with all suburban versus urban people, but my brother and I fight like there is no tomorrow now. It never used to be like this, but we are so different now that we find nothing else to talk about with each other besides arguing where to eat when we go on vacation. Let's just say I didn't get to eat at a single Italian restaurant in Northie Boston while I was on a family vacation because of him--instead, we ate at Cheesecake factory, and when I ordered the four cheese pasta, he mentioned that "at least he got his authentic Italian fix now" in a completely serious tone, and he gave me a completely confused look when I rolled my eyes at him. Ignorant, stupid **** like that sums up why I can't live in the suburbs anymore, because there are so may other people who probably would have said the same thing.
That's sad. He's your brother, the only guy you'll know likely for your (or his) entire life, the guy you laughed at farts with. Even if you can't relate in interests and knowledge, surely you can crack some jokes and leer at women together? Why is it so important to you anyways that he know 'authenticity?' Don't you know that authenticity dissipates with awareness and intent? This is why Great Gatsby is such a great novel. Restless man from the unsophisticated Midwest seeks to experience the metropolitan, grows disillusioned, witnesses that Gatsby had everything yet nothing that truly mattered at the funeral, and comes to terms with his upbringing to return home.

Originally Posted by CodeRed

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There is a big difference between Urban>Suburban>Rural. Personally I can only appreciate the urban and rural settings. Suburban is like an early death.
I agree, completely. It's either rural or urban for me. I lived in a suburb for 2 years, and that was way too long for me.

Originally Posted by Huntsman

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...There is a divide. The urban patronizes the rural; the rural distrusts the urban. It's really unfortunate, but in the end the divide exists because everyone thinks they're so damn smart.

~ Huntsman

I agree. I've lived in and stay connected to both.

Originally Posted by apocalypse later

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Let's just say I didn't get to eat at a single Italian restaurant in Northie Boston while I was on a family vacation because of him--instead, we ate at Cheesecake factory, and when I ordered the four cheese pasta, he mentioned that "at least he got his authentic Italian fix now" in a completely serious tone, and he gave me a completely confused look when I rolled my eyes at him. Ignorant, stupid **** like that sums up why I can't live in the suburbs anymore, because there are so may other people who probably would have said the same thing.

There are the people who think you can get "authentic" Italian food at the Cheesecake Factory.

And there are people who think you can get "authentic" Italian food in "Northie Boston".

And then there are the people who know you can't get "authentic" Italian food in either place.

Originally Posted by Huntsman

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Pretty much agreed -- Suburbia as such is the epitome of the 'little boxes, on the hillside, little boxes made of ticky tacky and they're all just the same.' Suburbia is adrift and lost. Rural knows itself and understands itself and is only confused with the assault of suburbia.

I live rural but vacation urban and operate in both spheres, differently. Those who only know my urbane facets have difficulty conceiving that I wear jeans and drive a tractor at home. Those who know my rural facets would probably stop talking about me if they knew where I ate and how much I paid for my drinks when I'm away. There is a divide. The urban patronizes the rural; the rural distrusts the urban. It's really unfortunate, but in the end the divide exists because everyone thinks they're so damn smart.

~ Huntsman
You know, I'm beginning to like you.

Originally Posted by Huntsman

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Pretty much agreed -- Suburbia as such is the epitome of the 'little boxes, on the hillside, little boxes made of ticky tacky and they're all just the same.' Suburbia is adrift and lost. Rural knows itself and understands itself and is only confused with the assault of suburbia.

I live rural but vacation urban and operate in both spheres, differently. Those who only know my urbane facets have difficulty conceiving that I wear jeans and drive a tractor at home. Those who know my rural facets would probably stop talking about me if they knew where I ate and how much I paid for my drinks when I'm away. There is a divide. The urban patronizes the rural; the rural distrusts the urban. It's really unfortunate, but in the end the divide exists because everyone thinks they're so damn smart.

~ Huntsman

Wow-- awesome post.

I often times think that the people most concerned with this issue are the suburbanites who move to the urban area and then feel they must express contempt for their roots in order to cover up for their roots.

I think the suburban lifestyle is something that is gradually going to decay with the rise of transportation costs.

Originally Posted by Huntsman

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There is a divide. The urban patronizes the rural; the rural distrusts the urban. It's really unfortunate, but in the end the divide exists because everyone thinks they're so damn smart
That might very well be true but where in this divide do small-towners fit? Does the megalopolis urban patronize the small town urban, who in turn patronizes the rural? If you see where I'm getting at, the "division" line is not a clear one and is not the same for everyone - which tells me that it's not binary but rather continuous

Originally Posted by RJman

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You know, I'm beginning to like you.

Originally Posted by CTGuy

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Wow-- awesome post.
Agreed, except the part about suburbia being lost. I think that's just more 'everyone thinking their so damn smart' condescension. Suburbia exists for the middle class families with different priorities.

Originally Posted by CTGuy

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I think the suburban lifestyle is something that is gradually going to decay with the rise of transportation costs.
I don't know if transportation costs would be enough to offset the costs of decent schooling, home ownership, and "safety."