Advice needed -- what to wear to my wedding?

So I am getting married this fall. And I'm having a little trouble determining the proper attire.

The wedding will take place late September on the lawn of a nice house in Nantucket with water views. The ceremony itself will be held sometime between two and four o'clock, after which there will be a cocktail hour and dinner inside. It will be a pretty small wedding, maybe 50-60 guests, mostly family.

The bride will most likely be in some kind of Vera Wang dress, not a super formal one, however. Bridesmaids will be in pale blue dresses (again, not very formal), and groomsmen are TBD -- either navy blazers and khakis or navy blue suits, probably the former. After all, it's Nantucket, so it's somewhat casual.

The question is, what do I wear? I need formal enough to match the bride, but not super over the top formal. The time of day of the whole procedure adds additional complexity.

Here is what I'm thinking -- I'm curious to get feedback on my general idea:

Navy blue three piece suit made of Lessers 11 oz fabric.
English silhouette (I will probably use Field's).
Peaked lapel, one (maybe two) button. Probably one.
Besom pockets.
Lapels on the vest.
White linen pocket square.
Tie, color TBD, possible complementing bridesmaid dresses, possibly a more traditional muted gold or silver.
White shirt, possibly dobby to add some texture.
Flat front trousers with tabs (no belt).
Black C&J Aintree shoes.

Good call? Bad call? Anyone have any better ideas?

I figure if I get married I might as well at least get a new suit out of it.

Sounds very well thought-out. Not your garden variety business suit. I like it. You could also consider a DB versus the three piece. Beyond that I don't think I have much to offer.

You'll probably get some objections to the lapels on the vest as a country detail on what is otherwise a fairly formal suit...but you won't get them from me.

If you've ever wanted a DB vest, this would be the time to do it ...

However ... much as I think "matching" among groom and groomsmen looks silly and contrived, I do think the overall formality level ought to be the same. I don't think a three piece suit on you pairs well with blazers on them. If you are in a suit, they should wear suits, IMO. Otherwise, you could all wear blazers.

Pair yours with light gray or cream gabardine. It will look smart enough for an outdoor wedding.

A navy suit is a good choice and will look rather classic in the photos of your wedding. I would vote for the silver tie with the white shirt.

I have seen groomsmen in blue blazers and khakis at weddings held at resorts and wineries in the summer. It is a nice look.

Oh, yeah, get a real wedding tie. Solid ties are great, but not as elegant for this particular occasion.

Originally Posted by Manton

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Oh, yeah, get a real wedding tie. Solid ties are great, but not as elegant for this particular occasion.
A little O/T, but when you go to a wedding as a guest, should you wear a wedding tie? It seems that many of my friends are getting ready for a second go, and they have chosen marital virgins, so wedding season might be upon me again.

Originally Posted by iammatt

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A little O/T, but when you go to a wedding as a guest, should you wear a wedding tie?

I always do. They look so nice. And it's not like wearing the special boutennierre, which would make you look like you are posing as a member of the wedding party. It's just a tie after all. But it's formal and festive at the same time, which is what the occasion calls for.

First, congratulations.

Also, I didn't see you mention it. Will your suit coat have double rear vents?

And if you are thinking of coming out of the wedding with a superb usable business suit, I would consider flapped versus besom pockets.

I agree with Manton that there might be a disconnect if your groomsmen are wearing blazers and khakis and you are in a 3 piece suit. But this would be overridden by the fact that you would feel like you are at a similar level of formality to your bride.

And there ain't nothing wrong with coming out of the celebration with a nice Navy suit.

Remember, montecristo#4, about 50% of marriages work out these days, but a beautiful Navy suit is timeless and forever

Originally Posted by Manton

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Oh, yeah, get a real wedding tie. Solid ties are great, but not as elegant for this particular occasion.

What exactly constitutes a wedding tie, and do I have to wear one as the groom? I wanted to just wear a navy tie with white stripes--bad?

Here are some wedding tie ideas from another thread.

http://www.styleforum.net/showthread...+shirt+wedding

Originally Posted by mafoofan

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What exactly constitutes a wedding tie, and do I have to wear one as the groom? I wanted to just wear a navy tie with white stripes--bad?

Oh, yeah. You'll be in divorce court within the year.

Seriously, it's a gray/black/white/silver check or plaid or Macclesfield. It's the traditional English tie for a wedding, and the custom is, or was, widely followed on the Continent. I love them.







Second from right is the one I wore to my own wedding. It is a black and light silver shepherd's check -- the ne plus ultra of wedding ties. I have also loaned it to two friends who have worn it to theirs. Far right is the one my father-in-law wore. I bought ties for the wedding party (all different), and he gave his to me when it was over, saying that he could not imagine any occasion to ever wear it again.

Far left is what I wore to my daughter's baptism. The others I have worn to other people's weddings.

I would not wear a striped tie to a wedding, either as guest or groom. They are too informal and (frankly) just don't rise to the occasion.

Unlike some other, more prolific authors , I hardly ever get to point people to my ouvre, so here goes! For further reading:

http://thelondonlounge.net/gl/forum/...pic.php?t=6562

Originally Posted by rnoldh

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Also, I didn't see you mention it. Will your suit coat have double rear vents?

Absolutely.

Originally Posted by rnoldh

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I agree with Manton that there might be a disconnect if your groomsmen are wearing blazers and khakis and you are in a 3 piece suit. But this would be overridden by the fact that you would feel like you are at a similar level of formality to your bride.

I am thinking of just putting the groomsmen in navy suits.... The bride's gown will most likely be kind of a cream color, not white, so I am a little reluctant of going khakis-and-blazer myself because my trousers could clash with her dress.
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Originally Posted by Manton

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Second from the right is killer. Great tie.

Congradulations.

I would suggest you cross check with your future wife before you finalize on anything.

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