Buying clothes to land women

While I appreciate the comments and admit that they can lead into a conversation that might go so far as to setting up a date, I also get ragged on by 90% of the males I hang out with (it's virginia beach, you'd have to be from here to understand) and if I didn't dress for me then I believe the negative comments might just overcome the positive.

I'll dress appropriate for the location/event and do so in a manner that will also leave me comfortable.

Although if there are clothes out there that can make women overlook the fact that I'm 23, have a homeless mans beard, and a receding hair line...then someone point me in that direction.

Originally Posted by Brian SD

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Okay Casanova, so you need absolutely no help from clothing, but what about us pauper types that don't have perfect bone structure, and who's hair looks better hiding under a hard-hat than done up with mousse?

I personally consider it very importantly. To me, a good fit means it makes me look more attractive. That's pretty much the core of it. Of course my own taste of what I deem attractive to women is going to be different from the muscly guy who wears A&F, because we're trying to attract different women, but..

True enough, but wanting to look attractive and wanting to attract women (or men) are not necessarily the same. There have been times when I have gotten compliments but been quite dissatisfied with my appearance. Conversely, there have been many times I have gotten no compliments, but have been very happy with how I looked.

I dunno. Maybe I am just more narcissistic then some of you guys.

I do enjoy clothing, be it its quality, colours, styles etc.

But I do think "dress to impress" if I'm going out, with a intent to "land" women.

Originally Posted by Brian SD

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Okay Casanova, so you need absolutely no help from clothing, but what about us pauper types that don't have perfect bone structure, and who's hair looks better hiding under a hard-hat than done up with mousse?

I said clothing was relatively unimportant, not completely unimportant. I recognize that clothing does play a role in one's attractiveness but I think its impact is often overstated on this forum.

The fact that a 'good' fit makes you feel more attractive only confirms that you have some sort of complex, although I do agree that physical appearance remains important, to a degree. Besides, a womens internal checklist concerning a mans physical attractiveness is dictated by more than just how he looks. I'm sure they place a larger emphasis on financial and psychological stability, conversational skills, and sense of humor. All of which require more than just one date to learn about. I think your level of attractiveness (in a womans mind) can develop over time, even if you fail miserably on the first date; with a steezy outfit.

Originally Posted by GoSurface

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The fact that a 'good' fit makes you feel more attractive only confirms that you have some sort of complex, although I do agree that physical appearance remains important, to a degree. Besides, a womens internal checklist concerning a mans physical attractiveness is dictated by more than just how he looks. I'm sure they place a larger emphasis on financial and psychological stability, conversational skills, and sense of humor. All of which require more than just one date to learn about. I think your level of attractiveness (in a womans mind) can develop over time, even if you fail miserably on the first date; with a steezy outfit.
No offense, but I can tell you have little experience with (dating) women. Generally, they make up their minds very quickly whether you will be getting anywhere, and it's very hard to get around a bad initial impression, especially with limited contact.

The biggest single factor that explains women's attraction to men is confidence, and to the extent that clothing can display or boost this trait, it can help. Wearing unusual and daring stuff is one example, wearing stuff that fits and makes you feel like a million bucks would be the other side.

I think I do dress exclusively for women, but to a certain degree. It's not so much that I would wear anything to get with someone, rather, I can't imagine why else I would be dressing nicely. Plus, even when I dress ****** and like to think women appreciate a man that doesn't give a **** about how he looks. I can't lose.

Originally Posted by j

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No offense, but I can tell you have little experience with (dating) women. Generally, they make up their minds very quickly whether you will be getting anywhere, and it's very hard to get around a bad initial impression, especially with limited contact.

The biggest single factor that explains women's attraction to men is confidence, and to the extent that clothing can display or boost this trait, it can help. Wearing unusual and daring stuff is one example, wearing stuff that fits and makes you feel like a million bucks would be the other side.

It really depends on the 'type' of women. And, I don't date women, I date men. Although, it's been a very long time. Confidence is a sizable part of initial attraction, but it takes a lot more than that for attraction to stick. I have a lot of female friends who would argue your point.

*edit*

My friend Camilla thinks we're both right, to a degree (hahah).

Besides, there are too many variables, and zero absolutes regarding this subject.

Originally Posted by ken

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I don't care which evolutionary psychologist you read, but they'll pretty much all agree that nobody does anything for the pure interest in doing it. Whether you're trying to display dominance over other men or attract women, there's much more than meets the eye to guys who don't wear sweat pants every day.
When psychology is a science, I'll take this seriously.

It is a factor, but my taste lands inside what most girls I'd like to date would find acceptable anyway. That is, I'm not reigning in my eccentricities to attract women. Consequently, I think I get compliments just by wearing relatively classic well-fitting clothing with concern for color, because it already puts me a cut above those who just don't give a **** about what they're wearing. I do look for clothing that I think is flattering on me, which I believe is a fundamental element of personal style, and that can't hurt. Whether any of this helps me get girls is pretty debatable.

Originally Posted by GoSurface

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It really depends on the 'type' of women. And, I don't date women, I date men.

I know, that's why I was pretty confident in my claim.

Originally Posted by GoSurface

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Although, it's been a very long time. Confidence is a sizable part of initial attraction, but it takes a lot more than that for attraction to stick. .

I definitely agree. But to me the most important time is the early stage of a relationship (or whatever it turns out to be). During this time is the only time that clothes are really going to help you. After that it just becomes a thing on a checklist she uses to mentally rate you, and a plus when it makes her friends jealous and her parents either approving/comfortable or pissed off, depending.

I land women so they can buy me clothes.

If you want to land women, try buying the clothes for them.

 I think my experiences are atypical here. I'm kind of a loser, I don't really have any friends, and when I go to bars, I usually just sit by myself and don't talk to anybody. Actively trying to solicit the attention from a woman from a man in my position is a hard row to hoe. "Hitting on women"- even to the degree of just asking her for her number- is something that happens five times a year at maximum, mostly when it's something the woman initiated. I can't compare my own experiences to the "typical" experience, because I'm not sure what the typical experience is. What most men and women do at clubs is a mystery to me.  I don't dress to the level of most guys here, but you can bet your bottom dollar I'm the best-dressed guy at Thirsty Thursdays. I think of that Beatles lyric, "Got to be good looking 'cause he's so hard to see";– if I didn't dress the way I do, I'd likely disappear entirely.  As far as unsolicited attention from women, I think I would correlate it more to how social I appear to be at any given time. If I'm playing pool and appear to be having a good time, and and talking with people who appear to be my friends, I'm much more likely to be approached by women.  I've dumped a few hundred buscks into clothes these past few months, at a time when my social life has been really abysmal, so I can't say what the net effect of the new threads are. Really, I'm not sure who I'm trying to impress.

If attention is what you want, you should dress not match but to complement or balance your personality. It fascinates people. You don't want your appearance to give you away.

Now, throw in clothes as a hobby. You are going to dress well. So dress well in the other direction of your political or cultural type. If you're a bleeding-heart liberal, dress like a hard-hearted conservative. If you're a tight-fisted aristocrat, dress like a generous dandy.

This way, you never bore people. They will give you a second and a third and a fourth look as they try to figure you out.

This is good with all people. It works too with women you want to seduce. It buys you time. It will not seduce anyone, all by itself, but it will give you some extra opportunities to work your more subtle charms.

The opposite of this is also true. If you are a misanthrope and you hate people, you can repulse them quickly by matching your outfit to your personality. Choose clothes that have common connotations that you illustrate. This bores people. They will pigeonhole you and move on.

There are some bad stereotypes which fit the above suggestion. For example, the high school teacher who's evil but dresses in schlubby jeans and tries to talk like he's still in high school. Anything that has been seen much before is to be avoided, because you get pigeonholed and ignored. You have to be an original ...