I broke up with my gf (general breakup thread)

Neo_Version 7 · Mar 30, 2011

Originally Posted by MarkI

Ok, what if she pleads, and comes out with some torrent of a speech, she's sorry, she regrets all this, she made a mistake, she wants things to be how they were.

Do I take her back?

General opinions.

I'm sure many (read: a majority of) posters here will tell you to move on and forget about her. Dump the *****, so to speak. While I don't necessarily condone such actions, you should do what you feel is right at that moment. Disregard the past and forget about the future for a minute. Do what your heart tells you. I mean, sure we might joke around with you but I can see you really care about this girl. And I'm positive she cares about you too. Why else would she be running around, putting out fires, messaging you, calling you constantly? Because deep down, she feels for you the same way you feel about her. She merely conveys it differently. Not all of us handle emotions similarly after all. So, listen to what she has to say. Be kind. Be affectionate. Above all, be yourself. She'll appreciate that.

RedLantern · Mar 30, 2011

Obviously in that scenario you do. You shouldn't, though.

HgaleK · Mar 30, 2011

Neo, you my dawg, but what experience are you basing this on? This exactly the wrong thing.

MarkI · Mar 30, 2011

MarkI · Mar 30, 2011

Originally Posted by Neo_Version 7

I'm sure many (read: a majority of) posters here will tell you to move on and forget about her. Dump the *****, so to speak. While I don't necessarily condone such actions, you should do what you feel is right at that moment. Disregard the past and forget about the future for a minute. Do what your heart tells you. I mean, sure we might joke around with you but I can see you really care about this girl. And I'm positive she cares about you too. Why else would she be running around, putting out fires, messaging you, calling you constantly? Because deep down, she feels for you the same way you feel about her. She merely conveys it differently. Not all of us handle emotions similarly after all. So, listen to what she has to say. Be kind. Be affectionate. Above all, be yourself. She'll appreciate that.

This is pretty much how I feel about it.

Bunch of you guys are all acting like its just ******* easy to throw someone who you've known for 2 years by the wayside, and shared such a wonderful thing with.

MarkI · Mar 30, 2011

Originally Posted by APK

If things were how they were, then that's a problem. Having things "the way they were" is what led to her trying to dump you, remember?

Here's the thing and it doesn't matter who we're talking about, it's pretty much a universal truth: a rekindled relationship is going to fail if the issues that caused its original disintegration haven't been addressed and corrected.

Perhaps my brain is just fried from the last 30 pages, but I can't recall this happening. In that case, going back will be like applying a band aid to a gunshot wound.

We know what the problems are, we've talked about them, the issue is that I believe they can be fixed, she does not.

RedLantern · Mar 30, 2011

Nobody has said it will be easy.

Dakota rube · Mar 30, 2011

This whole thing is playing out as some sort of exercise in masochism.

HgaleK · Mar 30, 2011

Originally Posted by MarkI

We know what the problems are, we've talked about them, the issue is that I believe they can be fixed, she does not.

RAAAAAAAGE!!!!

I back to supporting the lulzy option. Go with ur heart bro!

Neo_Version 7 · Mar 30, 2011

Originally Posted by MarkI

Bunch of you guys are all acting like its just ******* easy to throw someone who you've known for 2 years by the wayside, and shared such a wonderful thing with.

It isn't easy. I mean, just the way you talk about her (even the less-than-flattering comments), you're never overly mean or spiteful. You truly adore this girl on so many levels. It seems only after a handful of members here posted about you "manning up" did you come off as some psuedo-alpha male. She's just as confused as you are, Mark. A little understanding will go a long way.

APK · Mar 30, 2011

Originally Posted by MarkI

We know what the problems are, we've talked about them, the issue is that I believe they can be fixed, she does not.

In that case.

MarkI · Mar 30, 2011

Originally Posted by APK

In that case.

But my whole case was...I know we can fix them, let me show you. I think she's actually coming around to that.

Blah...this whole thing is going down in 4 hours and I still feel so lost about it. Meh.

MarkI · Mar 30, 2011

Originally Posted by Neo_Version 7

It isn't easy. I mean, just the way you talk about her (even the less-than-flattering comments), you're never overly mean or spiteful. You truly adore this girl on so many levels. It seems only after a handful of members here posted about you "manning up" did you come off as some psuedo-alpha male. She's just as confused as you are, Mark. A little understanding will go a long way.

Her confusion makes her build a wall around herself, it sucks, but she is so hard to talk to. It is what it is though.

edinatlanta · Mar 30, 2011

Yeah, months of heartache and confusion over the girl and she's the one who needs to fix things and that's doable. Yeah.

deadly7 · Mar 30, 2011

Originally Posted by MarkI

This is pretty much how I feel about it.

Bunch of you guys are all acting like its just ******* easy to throw someone who you've known for 2 years by the wayside, and shared such a wonderful thing with.

The understanding, you don't has it. Come back in a few months and you'll see things in a whole new light. She was ready to throw you out of her life. "I need to take a break" is the world's biggest copout in a relationship. The only things that are keeping her from banging Armando are your constant sniveling and her fear that she won't find anyone else. And yes, this is based on personal experience. What do you think's going to happen in two more years if she takes you back now? The same damn thing that crept up now is going to later.

I broke up with my gf (general breakup thread)

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