Met this chick and I practically screwed myself.

Originally Posted by Joenobody0

Click to expand...

I've never been a "treat a girl like ****" kind of guy. However, I am the sort of guy that's generally indifferent to everyone (men and women). I tend to do my own thing. When I was younger I was focused on college, as I got older I was focused on my career. I didn't really have the time or inclination to chase after any women. However, I was successful. Not rich, but always well respected in any situation. To put it in style forum speak, I was alpha as ****

.

I think women responded to that because they saw a driven successful person who tended to not give most people the time of day. Consequently, when I made time for a women or showed them deference, they responded very well. I'm sure that many people have assumed that I was an asshole due to my reserved and very private nature, but I have definitely been pursued by a number of desirable women. Before anyone asks, I am no Brad Pitt or anything. I stay in shape, am generally good looking, but I'm not very tall (5'8" or so).

So if you're actually looking for advice, I'd say you should focus on yourself. Get to the point that you're happy being alone. Cultivate a sort of aloof disposition, and concentrate on your own life. You might not bang 200 sluts in your life, but interesting good looking women will pursue you. At the same time, you'll be setting the foundation for a very nice life. I hope it works out.

Also, the best way to find slutty chicks to ******** with is to go to the bar and get drunk; especially the sort of bar that caters to the 27+ career women demographic.
good advice

Key to not giving a **** is to have something you're passionate about in life, video games and women don't count, and/or always be chasing more than one girl at any time.

Originally Posted by Joenobody0

Click to expand...

I've never been a "treat a girl like ****" kind of guy. However, I am the sort of guy that's generally indifferent to everyone (men and women). I tend to do my own thing. When I was younger I was focused on college, as I got older I was focused on my career. I didn't really have the time or inclination to chase after any women. However, I was successful. Not rich, but always well respected in any situation. To put it in style forum speak, I was alpha as ****

.

I think women responded to that because they saw a driven successful person who tended to not give most people the time of day. Consequently, when I made time for a women or showed them deference, they responded very well. I'm sure that many people have assumed that I was an asshole due to my reserved and very private nature, but I have definitely been pursued by a number of desirable women. Before anyone asks, I am no Brad Pitt or anything. I stay in shape, am generally good looking, but I'm not very tall (5'8" or so).

So if you're actually looking for advice, I'd say you should focus on yourself. Get to the point that you're happy being alone. Cultivate a sort of aloof disposition, and concentrate on your own life. You might not bang 200 sluts in your life, but interesting good looking women will pursue you. At the same time, you'll be setting the foundation for a very nice life. I hope it works out.

Also, the best way to find slutty chicks to ******** with is to go to the bar and get drunk; especially the sort of bar that caters to the 27+ career women demographic.

Excellent advice.

Originally Posted by Joenobody0

Click to expand...

I've never been a "treat a girl like ****" kind of guy. However, I am the sort of guy that's generally indifferent to everyone (men and women). I tend to do my own thing. When I was younger I was focused on college, as I got older I was focused on my career. I didn't really have the time or inclination to chase after any women. However, I was successful. Not rich, but always well respected in any situation. To put it in style forum speak, I was alpha as ****

.

I think women responded to that because they saw a driven successful person who tended to not give most people the time of day. Consequently, when I made time for a women or showed them deference, they responded very well. I'm sure that many people have assumed that I was an asshole due to my reserved and very private nature, but I have definitely been pursued by a number of desirable women. Before anyone asks, I am no Brad Pitt or anything. I stay in shape, am generally good looking, but I'm not very tall (5'8" or so).

So if you're actually looking for advice, I'd say you should focus on yourself. Get to the point that you're happy being alone. Cultivate a sort of aloof disposition, and concentrate on your own life. You might not bang 200 sluts in your life, but interesting good looking women will pursue you. At the same time, you'll be setting the foundation for a very nice life. I hope it works out.

Also, the best way to find slutty chicks to ******** with is to go to the bar and get drunk; especially the sort of bar that caters to the 27+ career women demographic.

Good post.

Key to most women: Talk **** to them. Don't worry if they get mad.

That is all you need to know. If you are able to talk **** to a woman and give her **** for fun, and aren't worried about upsetting her or crossing any lines, then you are as confident and independent as you need to be.

Originally Posted by Joenobody0

Click to expand...

I've never been a "treat a girl like ****" kind of guy. However, I am the sort of guy that's generally indifferent to everyone (men and women). I tend to do my own thing. When I was younger I was focused on college, as I got older I was focused on my career. I didn't really have the time or inclination to chase after any women. However, I was successful. Not rich, but always well respected in any situation. To put it in style forum speak, I was alpha as ****

. I think women responded to that because they saw a driven successful person who tended to not give most people the time of day. Consequently, when I made time for a women or showed them deference, they responded very well. I'm sure that many people have assumed that I was an asshole due to my reserved and very private nature, but I have definitely been pursued by a number of desirable women. Before anyone asks, I am no Brad Pitt or anything. I stay in shape, am generally good looking, but I'm not very tall (5'8" or so).
Honestly, it seems like I was approached by more women back before I started working out and "Dressing well" (or at least as well as I do now, heh.) Maybe it's because my demeanor has been gradually worsening, and/or because my social life has been gradually narrowing.

So if you're actually looking for advice, I'd say you should focus on yourself. Get to the point that you're happy being alone.

Click to expand...

I have focused on my self. I've had all the time in the world to focus on myself. I have my own personal projects… hell, check the links in my sig, which represent only a fraction of it. None of that means anything to anybody in the real life because nobody has any way of knowing about it. On the plus side, nobody has any way of knowing I don't have any money either. I'm pretty much a complete stranger everywhere I go.

Cultivate a sort of aloof disposition, and concentrate on your own life.

Click to expand...

Trust me, I have the aloof down pat. In fact, about a month ago, a girl actually complimented me on my don't-give-a-**** attitude. Which is odd, since it's not something I acquired as a matter of choice, but through necessity-- a kind of mimimum level of comfort not doing what I wouldn't have been able to do anyway. The way your advice would seem to translate to my own life is, "spend even more time at home," which I can't imagine would work very well.

You might not bang 200 sluts in your life, but interesting good looking women will pursue you. At the same time, you'll be setting the foundation for a very nice life. I hope it works out.

Click to expand...

I really have no idea what I'm going to do professionally, and I feel like loneliness is depleting whatever motivation I may have had. It's wrecking me from the inside out, and "friends" who have known me on a non-superficial basis have not only never lifted a finger to help me meet anybody, but have in fact done everything within their power to sabotage whatever few opportunities I've ever had to meet women, and then mocked my loneliness. Thinking about it makes me angry-- seriously punching walls angry.

Also, the best way to find slutty chicks to ******** with is to go to the bar and get drunk; especially the sort of bar that caters to the 27+ career women demographic.

Click to expand...

No. I've been getting drunk at bars several times a week for years, and have never met women on any non-flukish basis. Having a conversation with an unfamiliar woman that goes beyond introductions is something that happens to me once every few months at most. Of course, usually I go to cliquey college bars because they're the only bars I can afford to go to. Anyone who's not already familiar from school is pretty much persona non grata. Plus there usually aren't any pool tables in the shiki miki mill-about-and-socialize type bars, and I end up bored, then lonely, then resentful.

Originally Posted by JLay87

Click to expand...

Key to most women: Talk **** to them. Don't worry if they get mad. That is all you need to know. If you are able to talk **** to a woman and give her **** for fun, and aren't worried about upsetting her or crossing any lines, then you are as confident and independent as you need to be.
No. It is not all you need to know. You are wrong. I seriously think guys who say things like this can't imagine that there are people out there who don't go clubbing every weekend with their brahs.

Tagut, you should come to Chicago. I can't promise to get you laid, but I can promise to get you drunk and show you a good time (no ****).

Originally Posted by kwilkinson

Click to expand...

Tagut, you should come to Chicago. I can't promise to get you laid, but I can promise to get you drunk and show you a good time (no ****).

Metro and Slash have invited me to New York, and they have promised to get me laid, so your offer, while appreciated, will have to be given secondary consideration.

T, you kind of make me sad. Try wearing more black. For real. Someday when I'm not too lazy to type more I'll elaborate.

No. It is not all you need to know. You are wrong.

I seriously think guys who say things like this can't imagine that there are people out there who don't go clubbing every weekend with their brahs.

Click to expand...

LOL. I don't go clubbing and I'm definitely not a "brah".

Considering the fact that you only meet girls through "flukes" (i.e. through friends or through the off chance that a girl talks to you or you get drunk enough to actually talk to a girl) and that you rarely get past introducing yourself to women you don't know, it's pretty hilarious to see you act as if you know what you're talking about.

Originally Posted by tagutcow

Click to expand...

I really have no idea what I'm going to do professionally, and I feel like loneliness is depleting whatever motivation I may have had. It's wrecking me from the inside out, and "friends" who have known me on a non-superficial basis have not only never lifted a finger to help me meet anybody, but have in fact done everything within their power to sabotage whatever few opportunities I've ever had to meet women, and then mocked my loneliness. Thinking about it makes me angry-- seriously punching walls angry.
When I read stuff like this I think you should get the hell out off Greensborough (if that is what it's called). If you ever come to The Netherlands; I know of at least three women. At least.

Originally Posted by JLay87

Click to expand...

LOL. I don't go clubbing and I'm definitely not a "brah". Considering the fact that you only meet girls through "flukes" (i.e. through friends or through the off chance that a girl talks to you or you get drunk enough to actually talk to a girl) and that you rarely get past introducing yourself to women you don't know, it's pretty hilarious to see you act as if you know what you're talking about.
Brah, Unlike other posters I find your advice based on n=1 a bit tedious. Edit: Off to find a bum to fight.

Originally Posted by tagutcow

Click to expand...

= I'm pretty much a complete stranger everywhere I go.
This is your primary problem. You can't seem cool and respected if nobody knows who are. The perception of those two qualities has been responsible for 95% of every women encounter I've ever had. I'm married now, and don't go out alone at all. However, if I were single and in a new town, I'd be focused on doing well at work (assuming you have a job). I know workplace romances aren't the best, but doing well at work would definitely lead to the sort of perception that you're looking to create. Even if you don't date your female coworkers, they will still be into you, and you will be introduced as this great/driven/successful guy when you meet their friends.

Originally Posted by tagutcow

Click to expand...

= Trust me, I have the aloof down pat. In fact, about a month ago, a girl actually complimented me on my don't-give-a-**** attitude.
I think she was actually saying "pay attention to me cool James Dean guy". It might have been a very good opening.

Originally Posted by tagutcow

Click to expand...

= The way your advice would seem to translate to my own life is, "spend even more time at home," which I can't imagine would work very well.
Definitely don't stay at home. I've always been into boxing and martial art stuff. If I were you I'd join a real Jiujitsu/Boxing/Kick Boxing gym that offers some sort of cardio kickboxing classes. Women flock to those, and when they see a man out there fighting for real, they respond very well. If course it will take time before you're not getting your ass kicked every day, but it will be good for you. It will build confidence and let you know that you can take care of yourself. That's another quality that women really respond to. I know for a fact that my wife gravitated to me because she saw kick the ass of a bum that was harassing her and her sister. If you can be that guy, you're going to have to beat women off with a stick.

Originally Posted by tagutcow

Click to expand...

= I really have no idea what I'm going to do professionally, and I feel like loneliness is depleting whatever motivation I may have had. It's wrecking me from the inside out, and "friends" who have known me on a non-superficial basis have not only never lifted a finger to help me meet anybody, but have in fact done everything within their power to sabotage whatever few opportunities I've ever had to meet women, and then mocked my loneliness. Thinking about it makes me angry-- seriously punching walls angry.
Your friends sound like assholes. I wouldn't get mad and punch a wall about. 5 years ago I would have: 1 Consumed enough booze to comfortably make a scene 2 Talked **** to these friends + make obvious passes at their girlfriends. 3 Find a way to get myself alone with girlfriends while drunk 4 ******** with the girlfriends (if you get the this step, it will be likely that you can easily bed them) 5 Tell the friend you fucked his girlfriend and kick his ass. The bolded part is going to cause you problems. That is not aloof, and it's going to come through in a tangible way in your interactions with people. Working on getting every single aspect of your life straight: friends, work, self, and family (if you have lingering issues with that sort of stuff). Women will follow after you're done.

Originally Posted by Joenobody0

Click to expand...

This is your primary problem. You can't seem cool and respected if nobody knows who are. The perception of those two qualities has been responsible for 95% of every women encounter I've ever had. I'm married now, and don't go out alone at all. However, if I were single and in a new town, I'd be focused on doing well at work (assuming you have a job). I know workplace romances aren't the best, but doing well at work would definitely lead to the sort of perception that you're looking to create. Even if you don't date your female coworkers, they will still be into you, and you will be introduced as this great/driven/successful guy when you meet their friends.


I think she was actually saying "pay attention to me cool James Dean guy". It might have been a very good opening.



Definitely don't stay at home. I've always been into boxing and martial art stuff. If I were you I'd join a real Jiujitsu/Boxing/Kick Boxing gym that offers some sort of cardio kickboxing classes. Women flock to those, and when they see a man out there fighting for real, they respond very well. If course it will take time before you're not getting your ass kicked every day, but it will be good for you.

It will build confidence and let you know that you can take care of yourself. That's another quality that women really respond to. I know for a fact that my wife gravitated to me because she saw kick the ass of a bum that was harassing her and her sister. If you can be that guy, you're going to have to beat women off with a stick.



Your friends sound like assholes. I wouldn't get mad and punch a wall about. 5 years ago I would have:

1 Consumed enough booze to comfortably make a scene
2 Talked **** to these friends + make obvious passes at their girlfriends.
3 Find a way to get myself alone with girlfriends while drunk
4 ******** with the girlfriends (if you get the this step, it will be likely that you can easily bed them)
5 Tell the friend you fucked his girlfriend and kick his ass.

The bolded part is going to cause you problems. That is not aloof, and it's going to come through in a tangible way in your interactions with people. Working on getting every single aspect of your life straight: friends, work, self, and family (if you have lingering issues with that sort of stuff). Women will follow after you're done.

tl;dr: Just get your act together, dude. Live life to the fullest and you'll have a full life.

Originally Posted by tagutcow

Click to expand...

demeanor has been gradually worsening I have focused on my self. I've had all the time in the world to focus on myself. Trust me, I have the aloof down pat. In fact, about a month ago, a girl actually complimented me on my don't-give-a-**** attitude. Which is odd, since it's not something I acquired as a matter of choice, but through necessity-- a kind of mimimum level of comfort not doing what I wouldn't have been able to do anyway. The way your advice would seem to translate to my own life is, "spend even more time at home," which I can't imagine would work very well.
Man- what I think he was getting at was the aloofness that comes from being happy with yourself. The sort of attitude that comes when it honestly doesn't matter whether or not you go home with someone tonight not because you've given up on the company, but because you enjoy your time by yourself. People picked up on it quickly when I went through a depressed, giving up on everyone phase. It was a self-fulfilling sort of negativity that drove people away and proceeded to simply reinforce my feelings that nobody cared about me. I was miserable to be around, so people didn't want to be around me. If you're down enough that you've noticed it effecting your demeanor, then everyone else is getting the same vibe. I wouldn't invite you meet other people because you'd kill the mood. CDFS has it- pull yourself out of whatever hole you're digging and start living a life that you enjoy.

Tagut and I are sympatico :sad:

Originally Posted by Joenobody0

Click to expand...

I've never been a "treat a girl like ****" kind of guy. However, I am the sort of guy that's generally indifferent to everyone (men and women). I tend to do my own thing. When I was younger I was focused on college, as I got older I was focused on my career. I didn't really have the time or inclination to chase after any women. However, I was successful. Not rich, but always well respected in any situation. To put it in style forum speak, I was alpha as ****

.

I think women responded to that because they saw a driven successful person who tended to not give most people the time of day. Consequently, when I made time for a women or showed them deference, they responded very well. I'm sure that many people have assumed that I was an asshole due to my reserved and very private nature, but I have definitely been pursued by a number of desirable women. Before anyone asks, I am no Brad Pitt or anything. I stay in shape, am generally good looking, but I'm not very tall (5'8" or so).

So if you're actually looking for advice, I'd say you should focus on yourself. Get to the point that you're happy being alone. Cultivate a sort of aloof disposition, and concentrate on your own life. You might not bang 200 sluts in your life, but interesting good looking women will pursue you. At the same time, you'll be setting the foundation for a very nice life. I hope it works out.

Also, the best way to find slutty chicks to ******** with is to go to the bar and get drunk; especially the sort of bar that caters to the 27+ career women demographic.



dude, are you like my brother?