Married SFers: How much did your wedding cost?

I spent about $25k on ours two years ago, split between our savings and both sets of parents.
Best day of my life bar none.
Mainly led by what the missus wanted to do with a bit of my input.
Came off like a $50k do because we scrimped wherever we could get away with it; e.g. Food cooked offsite, delivered to marquee and reheated, half the price of cooked on site dinner but none of the guests would know or care. And hiring a digital jukebox with pretty much every song ever on it and letting the guests loose, rather than hiring a band. Cost $300 rather than $3000 and the guests absolutely loved it.
You'll have all your favourite people together, celebrating you, in one place exactly twice ever. The second time you'll have just died. Suck it up and give her the day she's been dreaming about for at least two decades before she even met you...

A few places where I would advise folks to save money:

1. Hire only one photographer. A lot of places push two "so we don't miss a thing." But if the guy is halfway decent, you should get everything you need from one.

2. Skip the videographer. We had a few guests who brought their HD recorders and filmed our ceremony. We still haven't looked at them even though we appreciate the gesture.

3. Don't hire an MC. A lot of places will push an MC along with a DJ. It's completely unnecessary. Doesn't take much off an effort for a dude who is pushing buttons on his laptop to also introduce the wedding party.

4. Invitations cost a hella lot of money. If you have a decent printer at home, use it. There are plenty of cheap software programs that can design a great invitation for you.

5. Two entree choices are enough so long as the place offers a vegetarian/special diet option at no additional cost for the few who may request it. Most people eat their faces off at the cocktail reception anyway.

6. Don't invite kids.

Originally Posted by Fraiche

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Gents - I am about to go down this path and trying to forecast the budget realistically. GF wants to spend about $30K and I'm trying to talk her down to $20K ($25K max) as I would rather put the money on a downpayment for a home. Is this a realistic cost for about 100-120 people?
We had a budget of $20,000 and ended up spending $30,000. If you do the same, maybe both of you are happy? In all seriousness, looking back, I don't lose sleep over that extra $10,000 that we spent. It costs a lot of money to put on any kind of event like that, and there will always be unexpected things that come that aren't budgeted for. Plus it was a really great day, you'll want to remember it that way, not fighting over $10,000.

Originally Posted by commodorewheeler

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We had a budget of $20,000 and ended up spending $30,000. If you do the same, maybe both of you are happy?

In all seriousness, looking back, I don't lose sleep over that extra $10,000 that we spent. It costs a lot of money to put on any kind of event like that, and there will always be unexpected things that come that aren't budgeted for. Plus it was a really great day, you'll want to remember it that way, not fighting over $10,000.

10 years down the road you may see 10k as a drop in the bucket, but in the short-run after that you will find many places that 10k could have gone. Especially if OP is looking into housing as well.

Got married at 19, spent $60 and it was enjoyed by the few close friends that came, we stayed married for 10 years. Two weeks after our wedding we went to a wedding that cost $60,000, it was a disaster and they were divorcing within a year.

Definitely not a likely situation for most people, but certainly shows that the cost of the wedding is not what counts.

Married off one daughter in 2009. Local Country Club and the bill was near $50,000. I paid for everything except the groom's parents insisted on picking up the liquor tab (included in the 50k) and limos to to transport to and from the wedding. My portion still was around 35K. Dress was a bit more than 5K.

Have another daughter getting married in 2011. This wedding will be held outside and I estimate it will cost just under 30K.

careful what you wish for my friend....

Originally Posted by Johdus Fanfoozal

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A few places where I would advise folks to save money:

1. Hire only one photographer. A lot of places push two "so we don't miss a thing." But if the guy is halfway decent, you should get everything you need from one.

2. Skip the videographer. We had a few guests who brought their HD recorders and filmed our ceremony. We still haven't looked at them even though we appreciate the gesture.

3. Don't hire an MC. A lot of places will push an MC along with a DJ. It's completely unnecessary. Doesn't take much off an effort for a dude who is pushing buttons on his laptop to also introduce the wedding party.

4. Invitations cost a hella lot of money. If you have a decent printer at home, use it. There are plenty of cheap software programs that can design a great invitation for you.

5. Two entree choices are enough so long as the place offers a vegetarian/special diet option at no additional cost for the few who may request it. Most people eat their faces off at the cocktail reception anyway.

6. Don't invite kids.

All of these are excellent suggestions and things I did to save a lot of money.

Mine came out to about $24,000 for 125 people. Families paid for it. I would have rather eloped and had no one spend a dime on us...

Originally Posted by Big T

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Married off one daughter in 2009.

Couldn't find anyone to take her otherwise eh? *nudge nudge*

I tease, I tease. You're on the opposite side of things as a parent, and from the sounds of it well off. What about your own marriage?

Originally Posted by GQgeek

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Can someone explain the appeal of a big wedding to me? I REALLY don't get it. Wtf would i want to spend all that money on people I never see and that I wouldn't miss if they were dead?

it's not about what you get and what you want. It's about what she gets and what she's willing to put you through if she doesn't get it.

Originally Posted by Matt

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It's about what she gets and what she's willing to put you through if she doesn't get it.

You guys have got to stop marrying complete ******* whackjobs.

Originally Posted by deadly7

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You guys have got to stop marrying complete ******* whackjobs.
waitwut. I'm married? I think I need to check the Purseforum for an appropriate smiley to convey my current state.

Originally Posted by Matt

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waitwut. I'm married?

I think I need to check the Purseforum for an appropriate smiley to convey my current state.

Not you, I meant in general. Your post kinda sums up a lot of the other ones in this thread and it made me

Originally Posted by deadly7

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Not you, I meant in general. Your post kinda sums up a lot of the other ones in this thread and it made me

oh. Well in that case I will use this one:

Originally Posted by deadly7

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You guys have got to stop marrying complete ******* whackjobs.

i agree, man. you guys are getting married to idiots just to get married. you shouldn't get married to anyone that materialistic.

i know for damn sure i'd only marry a girl who used a common sense approach to this kind of stuff. you guys are just settling. it's real dumb, but it explains the 70% divorce rate.