standing up when you talk to a lady

Originally Posted by Hans

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You are right that it depends on the person, but the OP *did* say that she was a lady, not some random party chick. Always get up for girls with pearls!
For a lady, I agree.

I saw the reverse of this at a hotel during breakfast time the other day; they were fellow conference-goers stuck in Asia or something like that, and I really did do the Patrick Stewart facepalm thing because it was awkward as hell. The woman was alone, caught with a shovel load of smoked salmon and cheese in her mouth, and had to do the napkin over the mouth thing. The guy was awkward to begin with and mosied over Joe Cool-like after stopping by the pastry table, and the woman about tipped her chair and the table over as she tried to slide out laterally to stand up (she was tucked way in, deep into her plate of food) and I think she wiped her hands on her white pants on the sly as she was talking to the guy. They were decked out in clothes that screamed 'mall!' and neither were really sociable. The whole thing took about 2 minutes but furthered my belief that I don't like America and don't want to return.

One hopes you at least doffed your hat!

Originally Posted by Britalian

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One hopes you at least doffed your hat!

Inside?

Originally Posted by globetrotter

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pissed myself off. friend of my wife's (wife of a friend) comes into the coffee shop and I say hello, and she stops to ask me a question. I didn't pop to my feet when she came in, jsut to say hello, but then it developed into a conversation. I really felt ackward talkig to her with me sitting and her standing, but I also felt that she would find it ackward if I popped to my feet after a minutes of talking.

anybody else feel bad about getting in that situation?

I'd get up to greet her and offer a seat. I don't get what your conundrum is apart from being a classless scumbag.

Originally Posted by FLMountainMan

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I do this a lot. I was raised to always stand up when a lady entered the room, and none of the men/boys sat down for dinner until my mom and sister sat down. My first few months in the real world, it was tough to have all female bosses. They'd come into a meeting and I'd stand up everytime. I had to force myself to break that habit.
you ARE a nice young man. well brought-up, too. I was raised in the South as well and not only do I stand up, I call any woman older than 25 "ma'am". which earns me no end of sh*t from my wife and daughter (who, unfortunately, is now in the ma'am zone; awkward).

Originally Posted by foodguy

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you ARE a nice young man. well brought-up, too. I was raised in the South as well and not only do I stand up, I call any woman older than 25 "ma'am". which earns me no end of sh*t from my wife and daughter (who, unfortunately, is now in the ma'am zone; awkward).
I call people ma'am too, and I always catch **** for it. People think I'm calling them old when I'm just trying to be nice and respectful. Ppl are weird, FG. People are weird.

Originally Posted by kwilkinson

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I call people ma'am too, and I always catch **** for it. People think I'm calling them old when I'm just trying to be nice and respectful. Ppl are weird, FG. People are weird.
yes, it's much nicer here on the internet, huh, little kwilkie.

Originally Posted by kwilkinson

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I call people ma'am too, and I always catch **** for it. People think I'm calling them old when I'm just trying to be nice and respectful. Ppl are weird, FG. People are weird.

If they're young you can call them "Miss"....

"hit or miss"?

Originally Posted by foodguy

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you ARE a nice young man. well brought-up, too. I was raised in the South as well and not only do I stand up, I call any woman older than 25 "ma'am". which earns me no end of sh*t from my wife and daughter (who, unfortunately, is now in the ma'am zone; awkward).

yeah, I use maam a lot, too, with about the same critirea.

I find that the ackwardness is in this -the basic idea of curtasy is to make people feel at ease or to show respect, and often these gestures, which are ingrained, often make the other person much less at ease.

After a little while, ask her to sit down. If she doesnt, get up. Use an excuse, like your back, neck or "I cant really see you from down here", you know, solve the poblem the gentleman way; make he think that you are the problem, while secretly getting your way...

On a related note, I have always found, that if someone really, I mean really wants to talk to you, they will squat.... So the good news here is, your wifes friend is...probably "not that into you"...

Small comfort I know, but still....

Remaining seated is not problematic, but you should have offered her a seat once she came to speak with you. If she declined, you should have stood up after a few moments of talking.

At least that's what I would do.

If you don't stand up, it's hard to see down their top. Just saying.

Originally Posted by Piobaire

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If you don't stand up, it's hard to see down their top. Just saying.

But easier to see up skirt or ass when she leaves.

It can be a difficult situation but similar to Matt I give a hand shake when being introduced to someone or acquaintances, brohug to friends and hugs to girls I know which all involve standing up.