Stroller to a funeral (close family member)

Hi all; long time reader, first time poster. Over the past couple of months, I have been pondering purchasing a nice stroller suit since I own no daytime formalwear (or semi-formal, if you want to be technical) whatsoever. I have just found out last week that a very close member of my family is deathly ill (literally), and we all know we will be going to a funeral in less than a month.

This may seem cad-like to even ask, but I feel it would be more-so not to ask. Would it be inappropriate for me to have a black stroller for such an occasion? I remember reading once (perhaps it was here?) that morning dress is actually what is meant to be worn at funerals, not black informal suits. Nevertheless, in my circle, wearing formal morning wear would be so noticable, I think it would distract and be a sign of disrespect. A stroller seems like a possible compromise between by-the-book proper dress and the stern conformity of an informal black suit.

If your thoughts are that it can be done, it what way would it be done to be most appropriate (can black jacket and waistcoat be done, etc.)? Thanks all for your help.

I'm not going to be a jerk since you have a family member in such dire straits but I will say that what you are wearing is the most insignificant issue of the event, assuming you don't show up in shorts or nude.

assjack

Personally, I wouldn't wear anything that calls attention to myself rather than the desceased. Though you will look at the stroller (quite rightly) as showing respect, most people will probably look at you and wonder what the heck you are wearing.

Originally Posted by Hanseat

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Personally, I wouldn't wear anything that calls attention to myself rather than the desceased.

Bingo.

^^^^ All true and agreed to. I'm wondering if it'll be thought of as a particularly subdued sportcoat and trousers ensemble these days.

wear a black suit, or navy. sportcoat and slacks maybe.

Go for it, I say. If you don't take advantage of the opportunity to acquire and employ a black stroller now, at this funeral, then you'll probably never get around to it. Better to establish your preference for protocol - rather than peer pressure - early on, since each incident of offending people with your correctness will be successively milder.

If you didn't wear a vest, I don't think anyone would notice.

This reminds me of that kid last year that was going to court for drunk driving and was wondering if it was a good idea to strut around in a three-piece.

Originally Posted by Hanseat

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Personally, I wouldn't wear anything that calls attention to myself rather than the desceased. Though you will look at the stroller (quite rightly) as showing respect, most people will probably look at you and wonder what the heck you are wearing.

Absolutely right.

Just go in a normal suit not in what will appear to be fancy dress or worse, affectation to all others gathered.

Originally Posted by Hanseat

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Personally, I wouldn't wear anything that calls attention to myself rather than the desceased. Though you will look at the stroller (quite rightly) as showing respect, most people will probably look at you and wonder what the heck you are wearing.

+1.
Sorry for your loss. I'd wear a charcoal gray (or black) suit, white shirt, black grenadine tie, white pocket square.

Originally Posted by thinman

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+1.
Sorry for your loss. I'd wear a charcoal gray (or black) suit, white shirt, black grenadine tie, white pocket square.

Probably more sorry than the OP who is more concerned whether he can get away with a stroller. I mean really? Wear a black suit. You already know you are just going to draw attention to yourself wearing the stroller - not the appropriate place to make your style statement.

Originally Posted by MrDaniels

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This reminds me of that kid last year that was going to court for drunk driving and was wondering if it was a good idea to strut around in a three-piece.

Connemara

Well, those responses are quite what I expected. I own a black suit and tie already for occasions such as this, so wearing that is not a problem. I've given thought to this very situation over the years; in this particular case, I will be one of the bereaved, so I was really pondering whether it might be more appropriate to be more formal than those who are showing their respects. Though it can be a bit conspicuous, I was hoping black jacket, black waistcoat might abate that factor.

My intention is not to act ostentatiously, as some of you immediately assume; rather, the fact that I am about to purchase a stroller anyway provides me with a chance to show more respect (both to the deceased and those coming to pay their respects) at such a solemn event than perhaps I had been doing in the past with a black suit/tie.