1. In 2018. by way of thanks for being a part of this community, we'll be choosing 16 active members of our community at random to receive a special gift and a gift certificate for one of our affiliate vendors, to represent each of our 16 years.

    Fok and the Styleforum Team

    Dismiss Notice
Dismiss Notice

STYLE. COMMUNITY. GREAT CLOTHING.

Bored of counting likes on social networks? At Styleforum, you’ll find rousing discussions that go beyond strings of emojis.

Click Here to join Styleforum's thousands of style enthusiasts today!

Your favorite Jokes?

Discussion in 'Social Life, Food & Drink, Travel' started by Soph, Oct 1, 2006.

  1. Nantucket Red

    Nantucket Red "Mr. Fashionista"

    Messages:
    5,742
    Likes Received:
    15
    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2006
    Location:
    Upper East Coast
    Guy walks into a bar with a monkey on his head.

    Bartender asks, "What'll you have?"

    Monkey says, "Gimme a bourbon straight up, and the stupid monkey'll have a beer."

    In the same vein:

    Guy walks into a vetrinarian's office with a parrot on his shoulder. The receptionist asks, "What can I do for you?"

    Parrot says, "I'd like to see the doctor about removing this ugly wart from my ass."
     


  2. chrysalid

    chrysalid Senior Member

    Messages:
    542
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2006
    Location:
    UK
    Why are pirates called pirates?
    Because they AAARRRRRRRR!

    (one for the mid-90s ravers)
    Why do monkeys get lost?
    Because jungle is massive.

    How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Two, one to change the lightbulb and one to su....on second thoughts, this forum is relatively polite company.
     


  3. Nantucket Red

    Nantucket Red "Mr. Fashionista"

    Messages:
    5,742
    Likes Received:
    15
    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2006
    Location:
    Upper East Coast
    How many WASPs does it take to change a light bulb?

    Two: One to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.
     


  4. Britalian

    Britalian Distinguished Member

    Messages:
    2,652
    Likes Received:
    36
    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2006
    Location:
    Italy.
    Why are pirates called pirates?
    Because they AAARRRRRRRR!



    How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
    Two, one to change the lightbulb and one to su....on second thoughts, this forum is relatively polite company.


    [​IMG]

    Yes, I know how it 'finishes off'... [​IMG] [​IMG]
     


  5. chrysalid

    chrysalid Senior Member

    Messages:
    542
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2006
    Location:
    UK
    [​IMG]

    Yes, I know how it 'finishes off'... [​IMG] [​IMG]


    It has a happy ending, as they say down the docks.
     


  6. rdawson808

    rdawson808 Distinguished Member

    Messages:
    4,226
    Likes Received:
    3
    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2005
    Location:
    The Capital
    How many kids with ADD does it take to cha---Hey. let's go ride our bikes!


    b
     


  7. masqueofhastur

    masqueofhastur Senior Member

    Messages:
    372
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2006
    How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but it takes him 4 episodes to do it.
     


  8. thinman

    thinman Distinguished Member

    Messages:
    4,926
    Likes Received:
    40
    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2005
    Location:
    USA
    How many supermodels does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one. She holds the bulb, while the rest of the universe revolves around HER (you have to say it with the correct tooone).
     


  9. chrysalid

    chrysalid Senior Member

    Messages:
    542
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2006
    Location:
    UK
    How many scatologists does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the bulb, the other to hold the stool.
     


  10. RJman

    RJman Posse Member Dubiously Honored

    Messages:
    18,647
    Likes Received:
    104
    Joined:
    Dec 10, 2004
    Location:
    Garak's Clothiers
    How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

    Fish

    How many message board trolls does it take to change a light bulb?

    One, but he uses fifty different identities to do it.

    OR

    Two: one to change the light bulb and one to blame Manton for it being out.
     


  11. aportnoy

    aportnoy Distinguished Member Dubiously Honored

    Messages:
    6,791
    Likes Received:
    673
    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2006
    Three telltale signs that Jesus was Jewish:

    1: He lived at home until he was 25
    2: He went into his father's business
    3: His mother thought he was God

    [​IMG]
     


  12. Huntsman

    Huntsman Distinguished Member

    Messages:
    7,735
    Likes Received:
    469
    Joined:
    Jul 3, 2004
    How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

    Fish


    Was it soluble?
     


  13. Toiletduck

    Toiletduck Distinguished Member

    Messages:
    2,551
    Likes Received:
    7
    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2006
    Awesome! [​IMG]

    Nice!

    Two Muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Holy Shit, it's hot in here!" The other muffin says, "Holy Shit... a talking muffin!"
     


  14. Nantucket Red

    Nantucket Red "Mr. Fashionista"

    Messages:
    5,742
    Likes Received:
    15
    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2006
    Location:
    Upper East Coast
    What's the difference between a tribe of Pygmies and a women's track team?

    One's a bunch of cunning runts.

    [​IMG]
     


  15. VKK3450

    VKK3450 Distinguished Member

    Messages:
    3,769
    Likes Received:
    2
    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2004
    Location:
    Primrose Hill, London
    What do you call a two legged cow?











    Lean Beef....













    What do you call a no legged cow???

















    Ground Beef.....




















    K
     


Share This Page

Styleforum is proudly sponsored by