Worst movie ever

Discussion in 'Entertainment, Culture, and Sports' started by Ambulance Chaser, Dec 21, 2004.

  1. Ambulance Chaser

    Ambulance Chaser Senior member

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    We've had a lot of suggestions about the best movie ever, how about the worst movie ever?  Two requirements: (1) it must be rentable at Blockbuster, and (2) it must have a mainstream movie star.  In other words, to be truly awful, a movie must at the very least aspire to be good.

    Here's my short list (I'm sure there are others, but this is what I came up with off the top of my head):
    Eye of the Beholder
    Poison Ivy

    Last night I saw Clementine, which I thought was going to star Steven Seagal.  Seagal has about three minutes of screen time.  The movie is a very poor ripoff of Kickboxer and about a dozen other martial-arts movies.  The mortal sin it committed was lack of action.  I think it makes the list.

    What's on your list?
     
  2. topcatny

    topcatny Senior member

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    Glitter - with Mariah Carey

    I tried to watch it, only because I heard it was so bad. I mean who doesn't want to see the worst movie ever made? I still couldn't make it all the way through it.
     
  3. shoreman1782

    shoreman1782 Senior member

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    Smokey and the Bandit III.

    The original is classic, the second watchable, but this is disgraceful. It's all crap stereotype humor, and though it seems Burt Reynolds wouldn't be associated with it, he has a cameo at the end. It does star Jackie Gleason, and the legend is, before they decided Jerry Reed should gamely impersonate Reynolds, Gleason was going to star as BOTH Smokey AND the Bandit.

    Bad sequels deserve their own category, of course.
     
  4. Thracozaag

    Thracozaag Senior member

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    So many..some recent horrendous ones (that I actually sat through in the theatre):

    Armageddon
    Battlefield Earth
    Batman and Robin
    Gladiator (sorry, but this movie was unmitigated drivel mixed in with horrendous new age music...poor Derek Jacobi)

    koji
     
  5. drizzt3117

    drizzt3117 Senior member

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    I liked Armageddon and Gladiator, but the other two were a bit terrible.

    Here are my choices as worst movies of all time:

    Deep Impact: Even Morgan Freeman couldn't save this one

    Hard Rain: Strong Contender for worst movie ever.

    Those two have been my top two worst movies for the longest time, but one has come out of nowhere to snatch away the title:

    ALEXANDER: A THREE HOUR TRIBUTE to the gayness of one of the world's greatest generals.
     
  6. Bradford

    Bradford Current Events Moderator

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    Worst movies I've seen:

    Showgirls - I always thought that the only way to save this file would have been to re-release it as a Mystery Science Theatre 3000 special edition. Naked women are always good, but sarcastic commentary would have been great.

    Solaris - I usually like Steven Soderbergh/George Clooney collaborations, but this reeked.

    Dick Tracy - Warren Beatty and Madonna - this remains the only movie where I got up and left the theatre, it was that bad.

    Bradford
     
  7. Thracozaag

    Thracozaag Senior member

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    Armageddon was so bad I didn't even know where to begin. It actually spawned a conversation on the way back with a friend of whether or not we could even TRY to make a film that bad (a sort of anti-talent for filmmaking). Ditto for Gladiator, which aside from the opening battle scene (which was really quite well done) was just dreck.

    koji
     
  8. Eric

    Eric Senior member

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    Dumb and Dumberer, ugh...

    Me and some friends ended up walking out of the theater during the first half hour of 2 Fast 2 Furious.

    I was not able to stay awake through Lost in Translation...

    I don't think Gladiator is a terrible movie, but it does get far too much praise, though I liked the music in the movie. And I liked Armeggedon.

    I thought Snake Eyes with Nick Cage was terrible.

    And I thought Spiderman 2 was unbareable.

    Eric
     
  9. Thracozaag

    Thracozaag Senior member

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    Wow...praise for Gladiator and Armageddon and derision for Lost in Translation. Whatever blows your hair back, man.
    I like the fact that they desperately tried to market Dumb and Dumberer as a sequel but never mentioned that neither Jim Carrey nor Jeff Daniels were in it. Lame.

    koji
     
  10. Nonk

    Nonk Senior member

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    Lost in Space.

    Some films are so bad they are good (I, in a sick way enjoyed Battlefield Earth) but this was simply dire. I went to see it in the cinema, and if I had not been travelling with a friend who was not available to pick me up until after this rubbish had finished I would have left early. I gave up after 20 minutes, and spent the rest of the time giggling to myself at the people who appeared to be enjoying it.

    Lost in Translation.

    The most over hyped boring film I have ever seen.

    X Men 2. It amazes me when people describe this as being "even better that the first one" (same goes for Spiderman 2)


    Hulk. Unwatchable.

    Devils Own
    Blown Away
    Any US made film about/featuring PIRA. I can't even begin to explain how offensive this tripe is.
     
  11. Thracozaag

    Thracozaag Senior member

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    Baffled by the disdain for Lost in Translation, an understated (and hilarious) masterpiece. The Hulk suffered from identity crisis, on one hand, it tried to be an action movie (and failed), on the other hand, it tried to be a drama of some depth and angst (also failed). I'll take you word for Lost in Space, I avoided that one like the plague. And for such a wonderful cast, The Avengers was god-awful.

    koji
     
  12. chorse123

    chorse123 Senior member

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    I'll second Glitter. I saw it opening weekend in NYC with friends because the tickets were free. We drank throughout the movie, and yelled at the screen, as the other five people in the theater--which held around 500--were doing the same. Awful. I'd also like to nominate Troll, featuring Sonny Bono and Julia Louis-Dreyfus, pre-Seinfeld: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0092115/
     
  13. Ambulance Chaser

    Ambulance Chaser Senior member

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    I hate to pile on, but I thought Lost in Translation was a movie-length Seinfeld episode set in Japan.  From one of the earlier seasons when Seinfeld wasn't that funny.  I wouldn't go so far as putting it in the worst movie category, however.  Most overrated, perhaps.

    The Unbearable Lightness of Being is another turkey.  Should have been titled The Unbearable Length of Movie.
     
  14. Thracozaag

    Thracozaag Senior member

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    I guess you have to be japanese (or part) to really get the film. It completely resonated with me, and the performances by Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansen were spot-on. Just thought of two more of the worst movies I ever saw in the theatre:

    Event Horizon

    Congo
     
  15. Tokyo Slim

    Tokyo Slim In Time Out

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    Matrix II and III - Why would you go and ruin the first one by making TWO pretentious, boring, insipid, unoriginal, pointless sequels?

    The Cooler - why even bother?

    You Got Served - yeah, i got served a big pile of crap.

    Police Academy 3,4,5,6,7,8... whatever

    2Fast 2Furious - and you thought the first movie was bad.

    Anything with Shaquille O'Neal in it.

    Cool As Ice -  The first (and last) starring role for Mr. Robert Van Winkle.

    Mortal Kombat: Annihilation - ...duh...stupid...

    Forrest Gump/Castaway - F you Tom Hanks.

    Anaconda - DAMN. I didn't know they made snakes that big.

    Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot. - Sly Stallone and Estelle Getty? What genius thought this idea up?

    Super Mario Bros./Double Dragon/Street Fighter/Wing Commander - I loved the games/hated the movies

    ...more to come as I think of them.

    Gigli - Nobody went to see it in the theaters for $10 - so why are they still trying to sell the DVD for $15?
     

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