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What to get out of college?

forStyle

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Long time lurker here.

I am a junior in college. Until now, my plan has been to take as many courses as I can by sacrificing a large part of my social life. My main major is engineering, and I am taking many classes in sociology, law, etc. I also help a professor with research. Along the way, my writing, thinking, and reading abilities are improving greatly, and I am managing my time better and work better under stress.

My questions are :

I have never been in a serious relationship. Is it worth it to put dating on hold, in order to establish myself career-wise?

Looking back, what were the most valuable experiences from college?
 

altie

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Everybody will tell you to get laid, that there's no easier time to get laid. I think that's bullshit. It just depends on how you identify yourself. I always had a vision for where I was going after college. Now that I'm there I do much better than I ever did while I was in.

There's no way you don't have enough free time to go on a date though. Try it out.
 

imschatz

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Lot's of available women at Universities/colleges. You don't even have to cast your net far. I'm a pretty ****ing ugly dude, with very little to offer women, and managed okay in my time as an undergraduate.
 

scientific

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you should try to have some fun, bang chicks, and study abroad if possible next semester
 

thenanyu

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Originally Posted by forStyle
Long time lurker here.

I am a junior in college. Until now, my plan has been to take as many courses as I can by sacrificing a large part of my social life. My main major is engineering, and I am taking many classes in sociology, law, etc. I also help a professor with research. Along the way, my writing, thinking, and reading abilities are improving greatly, and I am managing my time better and work better under stress.

My questions are :

I have never been in a serious relationship. Is it worth it to put dating on hold, in order to establish myself career-wise?

Looking back, what were the most valuable experiences from college?


I had a similar experience. In my opinion, get your career going. I am 2.5 years out of school (EECS major) and I am thrilled with where my career is. I sacrificed a lot socially to get here - I worked a lot of overtime, did a bunch of side projects to boost the resume, and made sure I performed better than anyone in my peer group.

I live in NYC, and ok-cupid is kind of amazing in this town and I would imagine, in any other major city.

Keep doing what you're doing.
 

ConcernedParent

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I don't know about engineering, but I spend A LOT of my time and energy on academics and have good grades as far. I'm in the humanities so YMMV. I spend every single day working on my career in some capacity (in class, studying, visiting prof's, etc..) and the only unrestricted free time I give myself is Friday night and Saturday morning. There really is no time for a serious relationship if you are ambitious, unless you have a girl that's super independent herself.

So basically, college... Friday: try to get laid, Saturday: recover/feel accomplished/lament failure, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday: study hard and dream about the ex.
 

thinman

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Originally Posted by Nathaniel72
Work hard and play hard. Don't sacrifice your youth.

+1. Don't make the mistake of believing you can only learn things in class. Social skills are important. Take it from someone who did very little except study hard in college and regrets it.
 

rjakapeanut

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i'm still IN college, and this is only my second year. but i can probably offer some advice.

i dumped my girlfriend before freshmen year -- not solely because of college, of course. but it was a factor. its super important for me (i'm pre-law) to get A's and not just B's. since then i've kept myself out of long-term relationships. i still party a little bit and i still...i don't know, "make myself available" to girls that i'm interested in at school...but i make sure that i'm just building a foundation of womenz rather than actually pursuing anything real.

i think that's important for my circumstances; however, i'm not sure if that's the right answer for you. for me i'd rather get the best grades possible so i can get $$$ from law schools rather than have to pay sticker (or worse yet -- settle for a lesser law school) but still be able to look back and say "well i didn't accomplish all my goals but i did have a ton of girlfriends in college"

if i were you i'd give it a try and see if you can manage it. you should be able to objectively look at the situation and decide whether or not you're capable of giving 110% while also managing the girl. go from there.
 

kwilkinson

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Originally Posted by rjakapeanut
i'm still IN college, and this is only my second year. but i can probably offer some advice. i dumped my girlfriend before freshmen year -- not solely because of college, of course. but it was a factor. its super important for me (i'm pre-law) to get A's and not just B's. since then i've kept myself out of long-term relationships. i still party a little bit and i still...i don't know, "make myself available" to girls that i'm interested in at school...but i make sure that i'm just building a foundation of womenz rather than actually pursuing anything real. i think that's important for my circumstances; however, i'm not sure if that's the right answer for you. for me i'd rather get the best grades possible so i can get $$$ from law schools rather than have to pay sticker (or worse yet -- settle for a lesser law school) but still be able to look back and say "well i didn't accomplish all my goals but i did have a ton of girlfriends in college" if i were you i'd give it a try and see if you can manage it. you should be able to objectively look at the situation and decide whether or not you're capable of giving 110% while also managing the girl. go from there.
If you are still in college, you can't, by definition, give advice to someone who wants to know what they should be doing for their final two years in order to get the most out of college and to have a good life afterward.
 

rjakapeanut

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Originally Posted by kwilkinson
If you are still in college, you can't, by definition, give advice to someone who wants to know what they should be doing for their final two years in order to get the most out of college and to have a good life afterward.

perhaps you missed the disclaimer at the beginning of my post? i was just telling him what someone else in his situation is doing and why i think it's right or wrong. even if he extracts a tiny tiny tiny piece of useful information from my reply it's better than if i hadn't posted at all, right?
 

kwilkinson

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Originally Posted by rjakapeanut
perhaps you missed the disclaimer at the beginning of my post? i was just telling him what someone else in his situation is doing and why i think it's right or wrong. even if he extracts a tiny tiny tiny piece of useful information from my reply it's better than if i hadn't posted at all, right?

Not really. The question was meant in that he wants advice for getting the most out of college in a way that enhances his life. If you're still in college, anything you say will be absolutely meaningless. Hell, anything I say would be meaningless too, because I'm only 23. You have no idea how to get the most out of college because you are still in it. I'm not being a dick, I'm just saying that it's that simple. If some guy posted a thread saying "hey I'm 30 and just got divorced. I want to try dating again but i'm unsure of myself. Advice?" I wouldn't reply and say "hey bro well i'm only 23 and have never been married, let alone divorced, but I totally think that xxxx and xxxx."
 

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