1. Hi, I'm the owner and main administrator of Styleforum. If you find the forum useful and fun, please help support it by buying through the posted links on the forum. Our main, very popular sales thread, where the latest and best sales are listed, are posted HERE

    Purchases made through some of our links earns a commission for the forum and allows us to do the work of maintaining and improving it. Finally, thanks for being a part of this community. We realize that there are many choices today on the internet, and we have all of you to thank for making Styleforum the foremost destination for discussions of menswear.

What tie to wear as a wedding guest?

Discussion in 'Menswear Advice' started by isealbz, Feb 12, 2019 at 2:05 AM.

  1. isealbz

    isealbz Member

    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    34
    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2017
    I'm attending an evening wedding this weekend as a guest, and I'm planning to wear a dark navy blue suit with a white shirt. I've come across a number of recommendations on the forums for black/grey/silver ties in glen plaid, shepherd's check, or houndstooth (so-called "wedding ties") for groomsmen, but does this hold true for wedding guests as well? It looks a bit monochromatic to me, so I'm tempted to go with something more colorful (wine, burgundy, or yellow/blue).

    For my low budget, I have the following options:
    1. Houndstooth Thrill (black) (also available in slate blue)
    2. Ombre Reflex Tie (charcoal) (also available in burgundy)
    3. Glen H. Plaid (grey)
    4. Mini Dots (wine)
    5. Grenafaux (burgundy) (also available with dots) (click here for additional images)
    6. Daniel Cremieux Signature Edition (yellow/blue)
    What would you recommend? By the way, if I decide to go with a black/grey/silver tie, what options do I have for pocket squares (besides plain white linen)?

    Thanks.
     

  2. maxalex

    maxalex Senior Member

    Messages:
    526
    Likes Received:
    237
    Joined:
    Nov 1, 2016
    Location:
    New England, Rome
    Traditionally one wears a silver or gray tie to a wedding, whether one is in the groom’s party or not. But it is a distant tradition and no one will think poorly of you for wearing the tie of your choice. Indeed these days the wedding guest with a tie at all is often the exception.

    That said, I would avoid a dark tie and especially black, which is for funerals. By the same token you can wear any pocket square that you like and which you feel complements your tie—except black. If in doubt, a white linen square is always appropriate. Except at a funeral.
     

  3. Anachronist

    Anachronist Senior Member

    Messages:
    266
    Likes Received:
    115
    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2017
    Location:
    Germany
    I have worn ties in red, burgundy and pale yellow to weddings in the past as well, though my advice is to then choose ties that have a more festive look. Stripes often appear very business like, so I personally would look into paisleys or florals. Avoid too wild color combinations and stick to ties with two, max three colors to avoid the pattern becoming too loud.

    Regarding pocket squares: never go with these sets of identical tie and pocket square, they typically look cheap and uninspired. A plain white pocket square is always an elegant choice, especially if your shirt is white and/or tie contains white. I usually try to use a pocket square with a different more subtle pattern or with nor more than a colored edge that picks up one of the colors of the tie to balance it out.
     

  4. isealbz

    isealbz Member

    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    34
    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2017
    Thanks for all the helpful feedback!

    Did you mean that one is not to wear any pocket square that one likes to a funeral, or that one is not to wear any pocket square at all to a funeral? I would have thought that a white linen pocket square would be appropriate even for a funeral, but if I'm wrong about that, I should make a mental note for the future.

    This is the second time that I've come across this point. Do you think that consideration would count against the Daniel Cremieux Signature Edition?

    I know at least that much!

    What do you think about pocket squares with colored edges that match a solid colored tie? I've wondered if that is similarly problematic.

    Fortunately, I still have a Kent Wang white linen pocket square that I bought about 9 years ago.

    Is it a bad idea to use a pocket square whose dominant background color matches the dominant background color of the tie (e.g. a burgundy tie paired with a paisley pocket square with a burgundy background)? Or would it be better to pick a pocket square with a background color that contrasts or complements the dominant background color of the tie?
     

  5. Anachronist

    Anachronist Senior Member

    Messages:
    266
    Likes Received:
    115
    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2017
    Location:
    Germany
    Dear isealbz,

    On your questions above:
    - pocket square at a funeral: I would either not wear a pocket square at all or, at the very most, a white linen one in a TV or presidential fold, i.e. you only see a thin line of it above your chest pocket

    - I still think that plain colored pocket squares with or without a colored edge are always a good staple in a pocket square collection and it doesn't really matter which part of it (edge or main color or both) picks up a color in your tie, shirt or suit pattern (if it is patterned, e.g. with an overcheck). The color match doesn't have to be perfectly spot on as long as it is similar enough... this trick helps to tie in the various more bold colors in an outfit. Obviously matching a patterned pocket square with a differently patterned tie is a bit more difficult and can appear, if well paired, highly sophisticated, but it is also a bit more "busy" look.
     

  6. Anachronist

    Anachronist Senior Member

    Messages:
    266
    Likes Received:
    115
    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2017
    Location:
    Germany
    Here's my view on the ties you sought out:

    - black houndstooth: personally, I think this pattern is too bold for a wedding and comes across as a better fit for smart causal with a sport jacket. Also, and this may be me thinking in my own clichés, but woolen and matte ties don't appear as festive as the gentle sheen of silk
    - charcoal ombre reflex: pretty much the same as above
    - glen h. plaid: better! Still however a bit more reserved... if you're not sure about the style of the groom and don't want to run the risk of outshining him (which one should never do), then this is a good option
    - red grenafaux: a good subtle option too, but due to it being more plain it calls for a patterned pocket square to spice it up
    - wini mini dots: I like this one... the dots give it a pit more "pep" and will pair nicely with e.g. a white linen (!) pocket square with burgundy edge. Contrasting textures like silky tie and matte linen pocket square make the combination look less "matched" and far more interesting to the eye
    - Cremieux yellow striped: honestly, I like this tie very much for its fresh and striking colors, especially the combination of patterned yellow areas combined with the subtle stripes which pushes it into the elegant domain. Frankly, I'd be tempted to make an exception from my recommendation in an earlier post about stripes for this one. Also, please don't take my advice on the stripes as a dresscode rule (it definitely isn't), this is my personal perception of stripes belonging more into the business context, however with exceptions if the overall appearance of the tie falls into the category dressy or elegant based on the colors, pattern and sheen.

    One aspect that should not be neglected in the choice of wedding ties is if you are going to the wedding with a partner, make the final choice dependent on your partner's outfit and which color compliments it best.
     
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2019 at 1:25 AM

  7. isealbz

    isealbz Member

    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    34
    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2017
    Those are both 100% silk. However, I agree with you about the houndstooth. I think one of the main issues is that the elements in the pattern are very large. It might look better if those elements were smaller and more subtle (e.g., see the following Kent Wang tie, which I can't afford right now).

    I actually looked into this shortly after making this post. The groomsmen are wearing black bow ties (presumably with tuxedos). So, I shouldn't have to worry too much about mistakenly dressing like a groomsmen.

    Do you think that it could work with this dotted pocket square? I already own this one, but I don't wear it too often because it is a bit too small for certain folds. I've been having a very hard time finding affordable silk pocket squares that aren't too small.

    I'll see how the ties look in person when they are delivered on Friday. But I think I'm leaning toward this option.

    Yeah, I like the look of this tie quite a bit. I bought it on a whim when I saw it on sale at Dillards. I'm just worried that combining it with a white shirt will be too... bright and bold. I'll see how it compares with the other options on Friday.
     
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2019 at 1:41 AM

  8. Anachronist

    Anachronist Senior Member

    Messages:
    266
    Likes Received:
    115
    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2017
    Location:
    Germany
    Yup, the Kent Wang tie is far better suited. With woolen I was referring more to the flannel like texture that I perceive as more casual (many rough-textured ties contain silk as well though).

    The dotted pocket square could pair well with the red grenafaux if the colors are close ... you'll need to check this in real though.

    If the groom and groomsmen are wearing blakc tie, I'd recommend the more subtle glenplaid or the burgundy though... they are not as bright as the yellow and will therefore not stick out that much.
     

  9. ShoeWho

    ShoeWho Senior Member

    Messages:
    115
    Likes Received:
    59
    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2014
    Location:
    London
    I don't know where you are or who's getting married, so I can only default to my background, which an American would probably characterise as 'old Hugh Grant film'. My verdict:

    - white shirt bad, too corporate and boring and robotic. Go for pink or yellow or blue
    - wedding tie rules are history, especially with an evening outfit. All the ties you picked out are OK, but go for something more cheerful and artistic. Express yourself. How about a hand painted silk tie?
    - make no effort to correspond with what others are wearing. You'll look like a mannequin. That's a disastrous, ignorant, ugly look. You're not on Celebrity Love Island.
    - a so-called 'pocket square', or silk handkerchief, should also not correspond with anything. Coloured or patterned ones are fine, even at funerals. And don't fold it or let the corners show. Just crumple it and bury it in your pocket so it's only just peeking out. Any attempt to style it = mannequin.
     

  10. isealbz

    isealbz Member

    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    34
    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2017
    So I ordered a few ties based on the recommendations in this thread. However, I didn't manage to find any pocket squares that I really like. Here are some possible combinations. What looks best? I'll have to make a decision by later today.



    By the way, I'm aware that the suit fit is not ideal, but I'm in the process of losing weight, and I had to buy everything at the last minute on a low budget. So, given the circumstances, this is probably as good as it can get. I also took these photos in a rush, so the tie knots and pocket square folds are probably sloppier than they should be.
     
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2019 at 1:32 AM

  11. isealbz

    isealbz Member

    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    34
    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2017
    Well, I made a decision at the last minute! Here's the end result:

    Thanks again for all the feedback on my post. By the way, in the near future, do you all think that I should stick with point collars or go for medium spread collars instead? I was hoping that the point collar would have a slimming effect, but I like the look of medium spread collars better.
     

Share This Page

Styleforum is proudly sponsored by

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.