Wedding Tuxedo Advice

[styleadvice]

Hi, I'll be getting married at the end of October and am looking for some help. I will be buying a tuxedo and am looking for advice on color/collar as well as what the groomsmen should wear.

I really like the Charcoal tuxedo in the picture below and would like some advice on Peak vs. Shawl collar. If I went with Charcoal, do you think standard black tuxedos for the groomsmen will look bad? Thanks for your help!

 

[Ben W]

It is your wedding, so it really should be about what you (and your future spouse) want. Forget what everyone else thinks.

That said, have you considered having everyone in the same color suit but have yourself as the groom have something more subtle be different (e.g. groomsmen wear a pocket square the same color as the bridesmaids' dresses but groom wears white)? I personally wouldn't think charcoal for the groom and black for everyone else would be an ideal thing. They're going to be close enough that it could look more like a mistake than an intentional design decision.

Peak vs shawl lapels would be entirely your prerogative I'd say.

For the shirts consider going with wing collars instead of a spread (spread is pictured above).

 

[Tony with Enzo]

Congratulations! Although I agree with the majority of what Ben has to say. Here are a few things I have said for years when considering outfits for your wedding:

-Try to picture in your mind viewing a big group photo years from now. What do you want to see? How will you stand out from the rest? How will you differentiate bridal party members as well?

-This is YOUR special day. If you want to wear a purple dinosaur costume, so be it. I doubt that is the case of course, but it is perfectly fine for you to stand out from the rest in a subtle way or bold way.

-Peak vs. Shawl - I have recently created more shawl lapel tuxedos than peak through custom for clients. I consider Peak more traditional and Shawl currently a bit more trendy but both are timeless. Try to go somewhere that you can see both created on the same fabric. You can mock this up on enzocustom.com and play with the customizations, this may help also. I created a couple below for you.

Best of luck with your wedding planning and congratulations again!

 

[styleadvice]

Hi Ben/Tony, I appreciate your responses. While some of it might be my decision I can assure you that my decisions are not always wise so I'm seeking out the experts . The one thing that I have been told is that the dress code is black tie optional so I don't think having the groomsmen in suits would go over well with the other guests. So taking that into consideration I guess generic black it is .

 

[Ben W]

Thanks for saying so Tony. I'm relatively new at this so it is good to hear an expert largely agrees.

Just to be clear: when I said "suit" I was referring to the tuxedos, tuxedoes being a sub-category of suit (all tuxes are suits but not all suits are tuxes). I wasn't suggesting you downgrade the formality to business attire.

You could do midnight blue for yourself, if you're really looking to have your jacket stand out from the rest.

Hope you find a combination you like, and congratulations!

Ben

 

[EdT]

Shawl collar is more hipster and not suited for every type of body built especially if you're portly and can be used as dinner jacket in your wardrobe afterwards, whereas peak lapel is more traditional and more suited for formal ceremonies like a wedding or formal receptions.

 

[styleadvice]

Shawl collar is more hipster and not suited for every type of body built especially if you're portly and can be used as dinner jacket in your wardrobe afterwards, whereas peak lapel is more traditional and more suited for formal ceremonies like a wedding or formal receptions.

Thanks! I found out we have a Suit Supply in town so I stopped by there the other day and I was surprised the sales associate was set against MTM and recommended just tailoring OTR.

 

[Ben W]

Thanks! I found out we have a Suit Supply in town so I stopped by there the other day and I was surprised the sales associate was set against MTM and recommended just tailoring OTR.

That may very well be fine if the OTR is a close fit to begin with… But you can definitely get pretty deep into alterations and still not have a well fitting garment at the end. MTM will likely be better and less expensive if a lot of alterations are needed.

 

[EdT]

That may very well be fine if the OTR is a close fit to begin with… But you can definitely get pretty deep into alterations and still not have a well fitting garment at the end. MTM will likely be better and less expensive if a lot of alterations are needed.

My shawl dinner jacket and trousers was OTR, but my military mess kit was bespoke as they are not available OTR and judging by today's prices I am glad I got them three decades ago ! ...LoL

 

[J.Odelius]

Hi styleadvice.

I'm sorry to say but it is entirely up to you and the bride of course.
I'm getting married myself in September and decided to go for a really classic no vent, peak lapel, black tuxedo. The whole ensamble will differ quite a bit however as most others will wear shawl lapels due to most people not having their own tuxes and no real reason to own any either sadly.
In terms of colour I guess it would be best if you can see different suits side by side. Midnight blue is quite nice and could be something worthy of consideration.

I would also advice to go for MTM if you have any decent businesses in the area and the budget allows it as any tailor worth his salt should be able to assist you as well with any queries.

 

[ValidusLA]

I will give two pieces of advice I guess....one will likely be unwanted perhaps.

1) I would consider midnight blue. For my wedding I did a bespoke midnight blue peak lapel tuxedo. I bought MTM midnight blue tuxedos for my groomsmen. I allowed them to choose peak lapel or shawl collar depending on their style. They all choose peak except for my best friend who is 6'2" and 160 lbs and looks like a male model. He choose shawl and it was a good choice for him - if you don't look that way I think shawl can be a pretty dicey choice. Our tuxes were very similar in terms of styling - the only things that made me stand out were I had a slightly different boutonniere (If you can - get your bride to be to not insist on the jokishly huge boutonnieres that are de rigeur in the industry these days) and sterling silver studs on my shirt.

You don't need to set yourself apart from your groomsmen - you will be recognizable in photos because you will be the one next to the beautiful woman in the white dress.

2) Now for my probably unpopular opinion. Wearing tuxedos as a bridal party, unless the wedding is black tie, is in my opinion costume-y. Wedding parties do not need to wear tuxedos. My wedding was black tie - so we wore them. My best friends wedding was not, and he asked all groomsmen to wear medium to light charcoal suits. Looked great. My brothers was not, he asked all groomsmen to wear navy suits. Looked great.

Having the bridal party be of a part with the event as a whole will look better that wearing tuxes because there is some sort of idea out there that tuxes are what you need to wear to a wedding. You do not need tow ear tuxes to a wedding.

 

[styleadvice]

Hi styleadvice.

I'm sorry to say but it is entirely up to you and the bride of course.

I do appreciate your response, I was just looking for the consensus on color. I had really liked the idea of the charcoal for myself but knowing everyone else would be in black was a concern. I've decided I'm just going to do traditional black as I don't really like the groom on display look.

I live in Las Vegas which is a double edged sword for clothing. I found out we have a Suit Supply on one end and then some really overpriced boutiques on the other. I just sent a message to Kent Wang to see about MTM through them.

 

[styleadvice]

I will give two pieces of advice I guess....one will likely be unwanted perhaps.

1) You don't need to set yourself apart from your groomsmen - you will be recognizable in photos because you will be the one next to the beautiful woman in the white dress.

2) Now for my probably unpopular opinion. Wearing tuxedos as a bridal party, unless the wedding is black tie, is in my opinion costume-y. Wedding parties do not need to wear tuxedos. My wedding was black tie - so we wore them. My best friends wedding was not, and he asked all groomsmen to wear medium to light charcoal suits. Looked great. My brothers was not, he asked all groomsmen to wear navy suits. Looked great.

Validus, thank you for your opinion as well. I agree with both points. My preference would be similar to your best friends, but unfortunately for me it was decided that the wedding will be labeled as black tie optional.

 

[ValidusLA]

Validus, thank you for your opinion as well. I agree with both points. My preference would be similar to your best friends, but unfortunately for me it was decided that the wedding will be labeled as black tie optional.

Oh well in that case if its a black tie event, there is nothing wrong in my opinion w/ being in tuxedos - in fact you probably should be.

See if you can get your partner to put "Black Tie Preferred' or "Black Tie Requested." I had this issue w/ my wedding.

We started at "Black Tie" because we wanted it to be black tie. But then we didn't want to exclude people who couldn't afford a rig. So we were thinking "Black Tie Optional", but this is actually confusing - it implies it is actually up the guest to choose what they want.

There is a difference between "I can't afford a tuxedo", which is a legitimate issue for some, and you should not wish to exclude anyway based on financial reasons, and "I can't ass myself to get a tuxedo / I think tuxedos suck", which should not have to be borne.

When you put "Black Tie Preferred" or "Black Tie Requested" you are letting people know you want them in Black Tie if they can swing it. We went w/ "Black Tie Requested" and of about 330 guests I'd say there were maybe 20-30 not in black tie.

Young female friends of mine called to ask what it meant for them (floor length, not black) and guys rented or bought. Those who couldn't afford to came in a dark suit and no one was a dick to them about it.

If we had put Black Tie Optional I bet we would have had 150 in BT instead of 300.

 

[styleadvice]

After checking out all of my local options I just ordered the Kent Wang trial jacket .