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Wedding Attire - Thinking of breaking a few rules.

tcrimsonk

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All,

I'm getting married in a month and a half. After lots of research on these forums, I had planned on getting a MTM Tuxedo from English-American (I live in Maryland, 40 minutes from their factory) however after a few weeks of phone tag, I found out they've recently closed their store.

I've never owned anything but OTR suits, so much of this is new to me. Because of the delay the English-American phone tag caused me, I decided to just order a tux from Indochino. I ordered their premium tuxedo. No vent. One button. Peak lapels. I'm basically going for a very traditional tuxedo, as I'll have occasion to dress black tie once or twice a year for the foreseeable future. I just have a few quick questions.

1. Vest/Waistcoat: Indochino only offers the modern 5+ button vests for an additional ~$100. I didn't choose to purchase one. I'd like to find a traditional low-v 3 button tuxedo vest. I prefer the look of the full back ones, but beggars can't be choosers. I have no idea where to find one of these, or whether I should, considering that the fabric would be different from what Indochino uses to build my tux.


2. My fiance doesn't want me, or any of my groomsmen, to wear a white shirt. She says her dress is off white/ivory/champagne so her seamstress suggested that the rest of us shouldn't be wearing white either. The groomsmen will all be wearing black three piece suits, so getting them ivory shirts won't be difficult. I am concerned, however, about finding myself an ivory tuxedo shirt. Does such a thing exist? I'm hesitant to buy one, since I can't imagine that I'll ever want to wear the tux again with anything other than a white shirt. I even suggested a white shirt with champaigne bow tie and pocket square, but she didn't care for that idea.

3. Ties - The bridesmaids are all wearing dresses from the Desi Group Sapphire Blue collection. Desi Group also makes ties and vests in the same fabric. Am I crazy to think I can get away with a bow tie and pocket square from them? I'd also dress the groomsmen in straight ties and squares of the same fabric.



I know I'm breaking lots of rules here. I'll appreciate any input you guys have. Thanks very much, and thank you for the wealth of knowledge you've posted in the past. I'm grateful to have such a fantastic resource.
 

Simplex

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@tcrimsonk

1 - Don't get an odd vest. It's like wearing navy dress pants with a Navy Blazer and calling it a suit. But if you truly want a vest, then so be it and get it. I mean, your future wife is already destroying rules, so why not get a slightly odd color vest?

2 - Although ivory is not proper choice, you can get an ivory shirt. Only issue is that it is hard to come by, but you can get ivory/off white/cream mtm shirts from Luxire. I like them and they turn around shirts relatively quickly.

3 - I wouldn't wear those ties/squares. If you can get away from it, do it. Possibly you can incorporate the color somewhere better, like a buttonire.
 

BigBadBernard

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OK; a few observations here.

In the UK, from where I am replying, wearing a dinner suit at a wedding is something of an indicator, but I guess that ship has sailed and is in any case more the done thing in the U.S. You have, however, made the right styling choices with single breast, one button, peak lapels, and no vents. On to your points:

1. Personally I would avoid a waistcoat. if you really must have one then you are right to go 3 button and make it totally contrasting in fabric, or it will look like you borrowed it. Alternatively, and preferably, go for a cummerbund in black satin and make sure the pleats point upwards. You should be able to find one online of decent quality without too much trouble. Brooks Bros will sort you out.

2. If you can hold out for a proper white dress shirt I would do so as you are right that you aren't going to wear a non-white one ever again unless you take up in a brass band. A quick google showed an off white one on sale at Nordstrom, but it was a pretty unusual item that I wouldn't recommend. Proper fold down collar is best - no peaks.

3. The bow tie in the picture looked like something that might be worn by the player of a grand piano in a Shanghai hotel lobby. So don't get that. And whatever you do avoid matching the handkerchief with it - keep that white (even if you get bludgeoned into the off-white shirt). Black would be best for a bow tie in these circumstances, but if colour is absolutely required then go for a silver grey, which is a safe but still smart choice. That way you can get ties for the groomsmen in the same colour, if you must, but again, white for the hankies. And one last thing, make sure it is a bow tie you have to tie yourself rather than the one in the pic, which looks like a clip on.

Hope that helps...
 

tcrimsonk

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@tcrimsonk

1 - Don't get an odd vest. It's like wearing navy dress pants with a Navy Blazer and calling it a suit. But if you truly want a vest, then so be it and get it. I mean, your future wife is already destroying rules, so why not get a slightly odd color vest?
My interest in the vest isn't just for this wedding; it's for future black tie events. As far as I can tell, my only options with an indochino tux are a cummerbund, or a mis-matched vest, correct?

@tcrimsonk

2 - Although ivory is not proper choice, you can get an ivory shirt. Only issue is that it is hard to come by, but you can get ivory/off white/cream mtm shirts from Luxire. I like them and they turn around shirts relatively quickly.

Perhaps I'll just look for a cream shirt then. Is there any reason cream wouldn't be appropriate for other black tie events?

@tcrimsonk

3 - I wouldn't wear those ties/squares. If you can get away from it, do it. Possibly you can incorporate the color somewhere better, like a buttonire.

Is it the construction/style of the ties, or the fabric that's the primary issue here? Dessy also sells matching fabric swatches, so I could get one of those, and have it made into a proper bow tie locally.
 

unbelragazzo

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You can sometimes find off-white tuxedo shirts in silk. Here's a (very pricey) one from Emma Willis:

http://www.emmawillis.com/collection/ready-to-wear/shirts/silk-shirts/ivory-silk-shirt/products_id/1343/cPath/15_134_166

You might be able to get one at a better price from one of the online MTM shops. Having it in silk instead of cotton makes it a little more refined and therefore better for a tuxedo. Silk usually tends to wear pretty hot, but if your wedding isn't until mid-September and you're wearing a cummerbund, maybe that won't be too much of an issue.

Avoid wearing that bow tie and pocket square if at all possible. Matching tie and pocket square sets are kind of tacky, and wearing saturated, shiny, primary colors with a tuxedo is a standard high school prom look. See if your bride would settle for you wearing a standard black (or perhaps midnight blue, to hedge in the direction of the dresses) bow tie and white pocket square.
 
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