Ways to ditch your girlfriend

[metkirk]

Hey guys, I've been dating this girl for 3 years, at this point I'm pretty sure my relationship won't turn out any good. I think she's tired of a long distance relationship and I'm tired of trying to find any remedies. I realized I had put a lot of effort in a person who can't appreciate it. What should I tell her, or should I cut contact with her without telling her any word?

 

[mack11211]

Cutting off w/o any word is cruel, after 3 yrs.

Almost any communication is better than none at all.

Best to call, explain. Classic 'splanation is something along the lines of 'it's not you, it's me.'

But if it's L/D perhaps pain of parting won't be so bad.

 

[mrpologuy]

This little scene from Seinfeld tells it all.


George: You're giving me the 'it's not you, it's me' routine. I invented 'it's not you, it's me'. Nobody tells me it's not them, it's me. If it's anybody, it's me!

Gwen: Alright, George, it's you.

George: You're damn right it's me


Just take my advice and never get back together. It never works and is more brutal than the first time.

 

[denimdestroyedmylife]

email her?

or email a friend and BCC her?

 

[Saucemaster]

Clearly a text message--sorry, txt msg--is called for in this situation.

 

[Fabienne]

Botch it so she doesn't regret you.

 

[metkirk]

I don't think it's me at all. Actually I will say "it's you, not me" to her

I've made promises to her and fulfilled them, all she did was swallowing her words. After 3 years and she cannot be sure of her feelings towards me now so there's no reason to get back. Call me a wuss but I will feel a bit better if she realizes she's contributed nothing at all to this relationship.

 

[lawyerdad]

After three years, why not try being man about it and being honest but respectful? I see nothing wrong with telling her, if she wants to know, why you're moving on. But ultimately it is about you. You aren't getting what you want or need from the relationship, and when that's so it's completely appropriate for you to end it. But trying to make it her "fault" is pointless and petty.
Then again, maybe Fabienne has a point . . .
PS: If you decide to go Fabienne's route, get stinking drunk before you talk to her. No half-measures.

 

[whodini]

I've been down the 2 year long distance break up before and it ain't easy. Hell, even the 8 month one wasn't easy. Clearly you two know each other well enough to know that it's been a long time coming. Just lay it out and get it over with.

My humorous contribution is directly from the Simpsons:

Dearest _____, I must leave you. Why, I cannot say. Where, you cannot know. How will I get there, I haven't decided yet. But one thing I can tell you, any time I hear the wind blow, it will whisper the name...______. And so, let us part with a love that will echo through the ages. --metkirk
P.S. I am gay.

 

[tiecollector]

Originally Posted by Fabienne

Botch it so she doesn't regret you.

Heaven forbid she take some responsibility for his hard feelings.

If it isn't a two way street after three years, then call her up and tell her what exactly is bothering you. Maybe she'll turn it around, otherwise don't waste your time if she isn't marriage material. I like to see long relationships work out though, call her up and tell her exactly whats on your mind. Communication is key.

 

[Histrion]

Easy. Send her the link to this topic by email.

That's it.

 

[metkirk]

But trying to make it her "fault" is pointless and petty.

I know man but it's just hard not to be petty after you did so much and it turned out ******.

Dearest _____, I must leave you. Why, I cannot say. Where, you cannot know. How will I get there, I haven't decided yet. But one thing I can tell you, any time I hear the wind blow, it will whisper the name...______. And so, let us part with a love that will echo through the ages. --metkirk

I like to see long relationships work out though, call her up and tell her exactly whats on your mind. Communication is key.

I tried to communicate with her more often but she's just apathetic. I mean her PC soundcard has a problem and we cant voice chat instead of typing on stupid messenger, she can't fix it so she just decide to leave it. I sent her some money to buy a new one but she says she's too busy to do it. Chatting with her online's a ***** 'cause she'll reply to my IMs after 5 or 10 minutes at least.

 

[carlhuber]

Originally Posted by lawyerdad

After three years, why not try being man about it


+1

Seriously. After 3 years? Nothing will make you look like more of a jerk than an email or just disappearing. Call her.

 

[metkirk]

Originally Posted by carlhuber

+1

Seriously. After 3 years? Nothing will make you look like more of a jerk than an email or just disappearing. Call her.

I'll be a jerk for once. All this time I've been too nice to her.

 

[carlhuber]

Well in that case, buy her a puppy and ship it to her.
Write a card that reads "Our relationship is as joyful and vibrant as this puppy!"


....don't poke airholes.