Today My Wife Said: "I hope he poops on your Barker Blacks!"

[Achilles_]

Originally Posted by EBugatti

+100000000

I don't understand how people want to live with animals--especially cats. Cats are total allergy-waiting-to-happen nightmares with no redeeming qualities whatsoever (unless you have mice, I guess). Dogs are a pain in the neck at best, and slobber-producing, fur shedding stinkers at worst.

People with pets live longer

I love my lab puppy and one of my favourite things in the world is taking her pheasant hunting with me

 

[DerekS]

Originally Posted by EBugatti

+100000000

I don't understand how people want to live with animals--especially cats. Cats are total allergy-waiting-to-happen nightmares with no redeeming qualities whatsoever (unless you have mice, I guess). Dogs are a pain in the neck at best, and slobber-producing, fur shedding stinkers at worst.

I hate cats. HATE them. Now dogs, thats another story. Theyre called mans best friend for a reason. get a good dog, spend time with it, train it, and youll never want to live without one.

 

[Orgetorix]

I haven't been this thankful for my allergies in a long time.

It's also been a while since I've laughed out loud as much as I did at Mike's posts.

 

[Metlin]

Originally Posted by DerekS

I hate cats. HATE them. Now dogs, thats another story. Theyre called mans best friend for a reason. get a good dog, spend time with it, train it, and youll never want to live without one.

This is true. Cats exacerbate my allergies, but my wife gets our dogs groomed regularly, so that helps.

I must say that there is nothing more relaxing than going for an early morning run with your dog! I came home last night from my trip and it was just great seeing them so happy to see me. Dogs are wonderful, wonderful animals.

 

[DerekS]

Originally Posted by Metlin

This is true. Cats exacerbate my allergies, but my wife gets our dogs groomed regularly, so that helps.

I must say that there is nothing more relaxing than going for an early morning run with your dog! I came home last night from my trip and it was just great seeing them so happy to see me. Dogs are wonderful, wonderful animals.

definitely. i lvoe mine more than i love 99% of people.

 

[Geoff Gander]

I used to dislike dogs, but now that we've had one for ~10 years they've grown on me.

A dog's love is unconditional, and true.

 

[Geoff Gander]

Originally Posted by wEstSidE

while that type of torture is hilarious to me, you should just euthanize it

All this talk of cats reminds me of something - thought you guys would get a kick out of this:

How to tell if your cat is plotting to kill you

 

[Ag229487]

My girlfriend doesn't mean to. She loves my clothes, but she'll just happen to spill red wine on me at a bar, or eat chocolates or some messy ass food and then hug me or put her hand on my leg. You want to yell at her but it's almost pointless to... I don't think she means to, shes just a f*ckin airhead..

 

[fuji]

Originally Posted by MBreinin

I pissed on my wife's handicapped cat after he pissed on my jeans, for the third or fourth time.

Mike

This is an excellent idea. My cat pissed on my bed today and will be pissed on next time I need a piss. Thank you for an inspiration.

 

[joneog]

Originally Posted by Metlin

The final straw was when right before a major client meeting on Monday, they peed into my suitcase on Sunday night.

I guess they waited for you to put a bunch of your stuff in one place so they could do the most damage with the least amount of effort. Something of a conspiracy if you ask me.

I don't understand how people want to live with animals--especially cats. Cats are total allergy-waiting-to-happen nightmares with no redeeming qualities whatsoever (unless you have mice, I guess). Dogs are a pain in the neck at best, and slobber-producing, fur shedding stinkers at worst.

Besides the allergies and shedding I'd make the same case about children. Plus it's alot harder to get rid of them.

 

[Fraiche]

My fiance thinks EGs and John Lobbs are worth $400-500.

And no, I won't be educating her further.

 

[NORE]

Originally Posted by Fraiche

My fiance thinks EGs and John Lobbs are worth $400-500.

And no, I won't be educating her further.

 

[SpooPoker]

Originally Posted by MBreinin

You better, bro. Because some women shut the cash spiggot off immediately post-nuptials. Get as many hummers in as you can too.

Mike

You are doling out some excellent posts lately. Bravo.

Originally Posted by gio3969

That line is stolen from Michael Douglas in either The Game or The Perfect Murder. I cannot remember which one.

The Game. "Your shoes cost $1,000?" "That one did."

Phenomenal movie, BTW.

Originally Posted by EBugatti

+100000000

I don't understand how people want to live with animals--especially cats. Cats are total allergy-waiting-to-happen nightmares with no redeeming qualities whatsoever (unless you have mice, I guess). Dogs are a pain in the neck at best, and slobber-producing, fur shedding stinkers at worst.

I love my dog almost more than my kid. Definitely equally.

 

[TimelesStyle]

Originally Posted by MBreinin

I pissed on my wife's handicapped cat after he pissed on my jeans, for the third or fourth time.

Mike

Would you have done the same to your wife's handicapped child from a previous marriage if she had one and s/he had pissed on your jeans? Just curious, no judgments.

 

[Duff_Man]

Not married, and no girlfriend (WHY WON'T ANYONE LOVE ME, I HAVE SO MUCH LOVE TO GIVE) but...

I am known as 'Gucci Gear' amongst some colleagues after: using a Dunhill manpurse as a 'go bag' during an active shooter exercise, used an LV duffel as a kit bag, wore Persols during the G20 riots, rocked Nudies to gigs in a few steamy and violent third world countries.