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Things That Are Bothering You, Got You All Hibbeldy-Jibbeldy, or just downright pissed, RIGHT NOW!

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Bergdorf Goodwill, Feb 7, 2007.

  1. Piobaire

    Piobaire Senior member

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    There seems to be common ingredients to many of your anecdotes that involve coffee shops, hot baristas, and uncomfortable conversations.
     
  2. patrickBOOTH

    patrickBOOTH Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    You know, you're right. It is pretty much my life in a nutshell.

    A few weeks ago I went to see this band play and before the band went on this guy walks up to me and says, "Hey, you go to Variety." I'm all, yes, I drink coffee. He's like, "Wait, you don't recognize me? I am there like everyday and I see you all of the time." I'm all, well I see a lot of people there, but I will say hello to you the next time I see you, what's your name?" He's all, "Well I guess I don't have a distinct enough look for you to recognize me." I mean, what a dick, right? The thing is he did have a distinct look because he had a scar down his eye like Sub-Zero in Mortal Kombat. Have not seen this guy since, he probably only sees me in the astral plane or something.
     
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  3. jcman311

    jcman311 Senior member

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    Has pBooth ever thought to collect these stories into some sort of memoir? I would probably read that (and I rather do not like readng)
     
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  4. patrickBOOTH

    patrickBOOTH Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    It would be more of a pamphlet. I am a very simple person.
     
  5. Piobaire

    Piobaire Senior member

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    I bet J. Peterman would buy these stories!


    [​IMG]
     
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  6. jcman311

    jcman311 Senior member

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    Thats what I was thinking! I bet he does have the simple life like Peterman too. Slumping on the couch at home complaining about the cable being out (or in pBs case, the shine of his shoes)
     
  7. patrickBOOTH

    patrickBOOTH Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    Jesussssss!!!!! Soaps up your arms!!!!!!
     
  8. L'Incandescent

    L'Incandescent Senior member

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    Pert near any time of day I can turn on TV and see baseball. But you know what I can't just see a WNBA game whenever I want because the quote on quote intelligentsia of TV broadcasting don't understand the mente of the gente so to speak the people are clammering for more WNBA coverage.
     
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  9. patrickBOOTH

    patrickBOOTH Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    So back to discourse on pB's dating situation. I downloaded an app where you look at women and swipe them in different directions depending on if you think they are sluts or not. I have swiped probably thousands of girls so far on this thing and have only gotten one match. Who is that lucky lady you ask? Gomestar's sister-in-law. Only because she knows me.
     
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  10. patrickBOOTH

    patrickBOOTH Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    My lesbian crush barista told me a secret. She said, "wanna hear a secret?" I said "yes" and she told it to me (don't think I'm gonna tell you guys because I can keep a secret).
     
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  11. patrickBOOTH

    patrickBOOTH Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    Now that I have been looking at women I have noticed things about their bodies that I find interesting. Women seem to gain weight in their upper arms. Men don't really. What's with that? Also, I have come to realize that I like women with very low hairlines. So I guess you could call them "hairy". I like hairy women.
     
  12. patrickBOOTH

    patrickBOOTH Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    It is very humid out, but my lips are chapped. That seems weird to me.
     
  13. GreenFrog

    GreenFrog Senior member

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    Went camping and canoeing in NH over the weekend.

    Did not take a shit (lack of urge).

    Just got home and took a painful shit that tore my asshole.

    [​IMG]
     
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  14. double00

    double00 Senior member

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    i think it's pretty common to dry out a little whilst camping.

    in college i took my girlfriend camping so we could bone down in the great outdoors for a few days. on the way back we got mexican food and she disappeared for like 40 minutes. i was wondering if she'd had a stroke or something and finally she reappeared and was talking about needing more fiber. i didn't dump until the next day but nothing tore. i think it has to do with not getting enough water and being a little overexposed.

    also: sitz baths.
     
    Last edited: Jul 17, 2016
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  15. O Jovem Mathis

    O Jovem Mathis Member

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    The buns area is like estrela-do-Mar which knows how to regenerate everything will torna-se bom I just know it!!!
     
  16. HRoi

    HRoi Senior member

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    What would a 10-year old like you know about tearing of the buns area?? :puzzled:
     
  17. double00

    double00 Senior member

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    maybe 10 years in the developed world equals 26 years in Portugal?
     
  18. O Jovem Mathis

    O Jovem Mathis Member

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    My teacher said it when we learned estrela-do-Mar!!!
     
  19. Piobaire

    Piobaire Senior member

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    I did quite a bit of camping as a youngster and into my 20s. I quit when I woke up one morning at moose camp and the coffee pot was frozen and there as two new feet of snow on the crowd. That said I have to say nothing beats the morning dump while camping after a night of drinking. Just you and nature.
     
  20. Van Veen

    Van Veen Senior member

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    My troop existed solely for the purpose of the troop leaders to get away from their wives, drink beer, and play poker. It was a very dysfunctional troop. There wasn't one Eagle Scout the entire time I was in it. (I made it to life, but quit when I was 15 or 16 and developed other interests.) We were damned good at starting fires, though. Always won the fire related events at competitions.
     
    1 person likes this.

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