Things That Are Bothering You, Got You All Hibbeldy-Jibbeldy, or just downright pissed, RIGHT NOW!

[Thomas]



What kind of meds is on?
Ritalin?

Three meds, actually. Risp, Foca, and a new one - used to be Clon, but I don't recognize the name now.

is he into any sports, T?

Soccer, and once the season gears up he'll be back at it

sucks, but sounds pretty normal for a 12 yo boy to be obnoxious. i think he will grow out of it. best of luck getting through it.

I don't know. There are a few reference kids we know who are older and in a similar situation. One's currently doing 7 years in the pen, for what is a heart-breaking situation, related to his emotional age as opposed to his physical age.

Sounds like an above average 12 year old boy. ****, I'm "25" and I'm probably only 13 mentally. And the only reason I'm 13 and not 5 is because ******* BOOBIES

BOOBIES are universal. I'm 40 and I still gawk and giggle when presented with a great rack.

 

[patrickBOOTH]



BOOBIES are universal. I'm 40 and I still gawk and giggle when presented with a great rack.

My g/f gave me **** yesterday because I think dick and fart jokes are consistently funny. What can I say?

 

[Douglas]

T - Honestly, I don't know how you guys do it. You must seriously be angels to take on a kid at the age he was knowing all the world of trouble and heartache you were potentially headed for. It's a truly awesome (in the real sense of the word, not the overused Bill and Ted sense) thing you are doing.

We have thought about adopting at some point, but we are agreed that we would have to take on a child right from birth. It feels a little selfish, especially when I consider that once kids get to a certain age, nobody wants them. I've thought to myself how cruel and unfair it is that a child would get no love through no fault of its own, and wondered who actually would take these kids on. Now I know one. Bravo.

no ****

 

[Rambo]



Three meds, actually. Risp, Foca, and a new one - used to be Clon, but I don't recognize the name now.

Don't sleep on how HUGE any, and I mean any, adjustment to these can be. Not to mention the introduction of new meds. If you want to talk more about it let me know.

 

[Douglas]



I got stood up on my date. I text her saying "I'm out front wearing..." and she texts me back "****, I'm stuck in traffic and I don't think I'm going to make it. So sorry!!!" So, I ask her "are you far? I can wait for a bit." She says "I'm FAR." I ask "How long have you been stuck for?" and she says "Its been a while. I completely forgot and wasn't paying attention to the clock."

**** that. What an incredible *****.

Please do not pull a Conne and call her or text her, ever again, unless she begs and begs your forgiveness with a ******* in there somewhere. Worthless people like that are not worth your time. Srsly, have no further contact with this person.

 

[Liam O]

My g/f gave me **** yesterday because I think dick and fart jokes are consistently funny. What can I say?

When her guard is down ask her if she likes Moliere, Shakespeare, Chaucer or Wilde.

If she does, she's a hypocrite.

Edit: Also, its probably unhealthy to let your left hand judge you like that

 

[Thomas]



T - Honestly, I don't know how you guys do it. You must seriously be angels to take on a kid at the age he was knowing all the world of trouble and heartache you were potentially headed for. It's a truly awesome (in the real sense of the word, not the overused Bill and Ted sense) thing you are doing.
We have thought about adopting at some point, but we are agreed that we would have to take on a child right from birth. It feels a little selfish, especially when I consider that once kids get to a certain age, nobody wants them. I've thought to myself how cruel and unfair it is that a child would get no love through no fault of its own, and wondered who actually would take these kids on. Now I know one. Bravo.

Thanks Douglas. The funny part is: we had no idea what we were in for. I could post a novella of all the cover-ups and look-the-other-ways that the agency pulled, and that's just what they know about.

Don't sleep on how HUGE any, and I mean any, adjustment to these can be. Not to mention the introduction of new meds. If you want to talk more about it let me know.

Trust me: I know. I've seen the swings between up/down, and I can spot in a moment when he's missed a dose. One day he ran in circles in the in-laws' (small) living room for 20 minutes. It is bizarre.

It probably helps that I run a lot, studied a little zen, and appreciate dadaism and Monty Python.

The good news is: he's not a bad kid. He's good to animals, good to his baby (foster) sister. Not stupid. Just twisted like a pretzel. Things could be FAR worse.

 

[patrickBOOTH]



Thanks Douglas. The funny part is: we had no idea what we were in for. I could post a novella of all the cover-ups and look-the-other-ways that the agency pulled, and that's just what they know about.
Trust me: I know. I've seen the swings between up/down, and I can spot in a moment when he's missed a dose. One day he ran in circles in the in-laws' (small) living room for 20 minutes. It is bizarre.
It probably helps that I run a lot, studied a little zen, and appreciate dadaism and Monty Python.
The good news is: he's not a bad kid. He's good to animals, good to his baby (foster) sister. Not stupid. Just twisted like a pretzel. Things could be FAR worse.

Sounds like he needs a girlie friend.

 

[in stitches]



Three meds, actually. Risp, Foca, and a new one - used to be Clon, but I don't recognize the name now.
Soccer, and once the season gears up he'll be back at it
I don't know. There are a few reference kids we know who are older and in a similar situation. One's currently doing 7 years in the pen, for what is a heart-breaking situation, related to his emotional age as opposed to his physical age.
BOOBIES are universal. I'm 40 and I still gawk and giggle when presented with a great rack.

sheesh. i have complete confidence in you that your kid will not head that way.

Thanks Douglas. The funny part is: we had no idea what we were in for. I could post a novella of all the cover-ups and look-the-other-ways that the agency pulled, and that's just what they know about.
Trust me: I know. I've seen the swings between up/down, and I can spot in a moment when he's missed a dose. One day he ran in circles in the in-laws' (small) living room for 20 minutes. It is bizarre.
It probably helps that I run a lot, studied a little zen, and appreciate dadaism and Monty Python.
The good news is: he's not a bad kid. He's good to animals, good to his baby (foster) sister. Not stupid. Just twisted like a pretzel. Things could be FAR worse.

that is good news. he really just sounds like a 12 yo boy to me.

My g/f gave me **** yesterday because I think dick and fart jokes are consistently funny. What can I say?

nothing. they are funny.

 

[Douglas]



Thanks Douglas. The funny part is: we had no idea what we were in for. I could post a novella of all the cover-ups and look-the-other-ways that the agency pulled, and that's just what they know about.

Can you blame them, really? If they were totally up-and-up about everything, would anyone ever take any of these kids?

Not that any of that diminishes what you're doing. Every day you spend with that kid is a gift of truly staggering proportions.

A lot of reading I've done seems to confirm what I've believed for a while - the bits are pretty much set by age 4 or 5. Not that continued development and learning are not important, or that somehow you're destined for greatness by a certain stage, but serious emotional and developmental building blocks have been arranged (or not arranged) by then that form the foundation everything else rests upon. You really can't go back and re-build that later, or totally undo damage done in that period.

 

[in stitches]

since i inquired at the bank about a home equity line of credit and then my credit was pulled at the dealer when i got the auto loan, i am now getting all kinds of annoying telemarketers calling asking if i am interested in refinancing my home.

 

[munchausen]



no worries man... I got this *****'s address here... and apparently they're not that far from my place. I'm seriously considering doing something juvenile.

Honestly, just tell her to **** off. Tell her she can deal with your insurance or she can pay for it her damn self. It will cost her twice that to sue you in small claims, and will take a lot more time and effort for her as well. She will eventually break down and file the damn insurance claim, and just maybe learn that she won't always get her way by acting like a brat. The last part is probably wishful thinking, but she will at least suffer for her stubbornness.

 

[MrG]



T - Honestly, I don't know how you guys do it. You must seriously be angels to take on a kid at the age he was knowing all the world of trouble and heartache you were potentially headed for. It's a truly awesome (in the real sense of the word, not the overused Bill and Ted sense) thing you are doing.
We have thought about adopting at some point, but we are agreed that we would have to take on a child right from birth. It feels a little selfish, especially when I consider that once kids get to a certain age, nobody wants them. I've thought to myself how cruel and unfair it is that a child would get no love through no fault of its own, and wondered who actually would take these kids on. Now I know one. Bravo.
no ****

Just wanted to +1 this, even down to the adoption part. MrsG and I have talked about adopting down the line, and I've told her your story, T. I don't know that we'll be in the right situation to adopt an older kid if we do adopt, but your story is truly inspirational.

 

[Rambo]



**** that. What an incredible *****.
Please do not pull a Conne and call her or text her, ever again, unless she begs and begs your forgiveness with a ******* in there somewhere. Worthless people like that are not worth your time. Srsly, have no further contact with this person.

Oh don't worry about that. I'm the inverse of Conne when it comes to this ****. I already deleted her phone number, blocked it with an app, blocked her on Match, and will never speak to her again.

Just wanted to +1 this, even down to the adoption part. MrsG and I have talked about adopting down the line, and I've told her your story, T. I don't know that we'll be in the right situation to adopt an older kid if we do adopt, but your story is truly inspirational.

See, told ya so.

 

[Thomas]



Sounds like he needs a girlie friend.

Yeah, about that. He kinda has one, but she's in Austin and they see each other twice a year when we all go camping. They never talk in the interim, it's strange, but that's them for ya.

Can you blame them, really? If they were totally up-and-up about everything, would anyone ever take any of these kids?
Not that any of that diminishes what you're doing. Every day you spend with that kid is a gift of truly staggering proportions.
A lot of reading I've done seems to confirm what I've believed for a while - the bits are pretty much set by age 4 or 5. Not that continued development and learning are not important, or that somehow you're destined for greatness by a certain stage, but serious emotional and developmental building blocks have been arranged (or not arranged) by then that form the foundation everything else rests upon. You really can't go back and re-build that later, or totally undo damage done in that period.

To your first point: you hit the nail on the head. As to the second point, I've heard different ages bandied about, but the essential fact has been: after age X, there's not much you can do. They may have their own epiphanies, but you're out of the loop in terms of setting.

I was talking to a couple of psychologists a few years back and they both separated trauma from disorder and claimed that you can heal trauma and then resume the development: they're just set back in that traumatic time until they overcome it, and then they progress from there. It means that they're kinda set back a few years and that becomes their peer group. They just identify with the younger kids. This, btw, leads to some PERILOUS years (post-18) if you see where I'm going with this.