Discussion in 'Classic Menswear' started by mafoofan, Nov 22, 2011.
That's pretty good that you were able to get people to wear a tuxedo to your wedding without explicitly stating so. I think you were only able to pull it off is because of your "fashion-forward" friend and that you do run in higher social circles than you admit/realize. The comment about the Briono tuxedo kind of confirms that for me. Most people I know don't own a tuxedo, would never consider wearing one to a wedding unless they were explicitly told to do so, have never heard of Brioni, and will never own a garment even approaching the price of someting from Brioni.
This thread is insane.
BTW, at the wedding I went to (which started this diversion), on one occasion I found myself in a small group where I was the only one not in the wedding party and thus not in a tux. It was o.k.
And despite the warning I got, had I showed up in a tux, that would have been o.k., too. It was a wedding. People were happy. Nobody really cared what anyone wore.
My view is that adults can make their own decisions and you don't have to worry about offending by stipulating black tie as a host. If they don't want to pay to rent a dinner suit and would rather not attend, it's up to them. Just don't be offended if they don't show up.
Well, Charlotte has a run of five big dressy-but-reasonably-priced Christmas parties within a two-week span that my "gang" has frequented for years, as well as a smattering of other such events geared to young- and young-at-heart professionals, so it makes sense for all of us to own penguin suits.
eBay, Last Call, and Century 21 are your friends
It depends. Obviously, you know your own invite list, but it is not hard to imagine having relatives that you would like to attend but know that they couldn't easily afford to rent a tux and you wouldn't want to make them feel bad. If I had an evening wedding here, I would probably not specify anything, or else specify evening attire, which would be vague enough to mean the right thing to each person that saw it.
Well, we did not specify any form of dress for our own wedding, and the wedding party wore suits, not black tie. Nobody showed up in a tux, even though it was an evening wedding. Maybe my background is too surburban, but I think the vast majority of our family friends would never think to wear a dinner suit unless explicitly asked to do so, regardless of the event's timing.
Anyway . . .
We didn't specify black tie exactly for the reason you point out, that there were some important guests we wanted to make sure could attend for whom renting a dinner suit would have been a burden. Yet, had I specified black tie, I doubt those same individuals would have been offended. The decision came down to how we wanted our wedding to turn out, not whether it would be rude to state "black tie" on our invitations.
Al Smith is dead.
. . . long live Al Smith?
Lighten up, Francis. I didn't say any of what you ascribe to me. It's great that you run in circles where men still wear tuxedoes. This may be a function of your locale, not easily translated to other parts of the country. In my experience in Missouri, Texas, and California, I could count the number of non-wedding-party tuxedoes on one hand (this excludes iGent-type events, of course).
BTW, am I supposed to be amused, tweaked, or offended by your changing my screen name? Just let me know so that I can react accordingly.
Word to the wise:
people and pets only do what you let them do. This is especially true in the US where everyone would style themselves as an individual if given half a chance.
Therefore you must act accordingly.
Right you are. The most glaring offense, to my eye, is the four inches of white waistcoat Romney shows below the front of his tailcoat.
But it also was not a White Tie affair, correct?
I remember being a young man (oh, so long ago...) and one of my college cronies had an engagement party. The invite stated "cocktail attire" and a few guys had to scrounge up a jacket. Then then groom arrives in Dockers and a polo.
This of course was the same event (in Manhattan at 7 on a Saturday night) where the host only served cucumber sandwiches, a bowl of raw broccoli (with no dip) and cake. No wonder the couple wound up divorcing...
Separate names with a comma.