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The 27 Year Old Virgin

Discussion in 'Social Life, Food & Drink, Travel' started by amathew, May 13, 2012.

  1. jefe

    jefe Senior member

    Messages:
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    Location:
    colorado
    Denver is, perhaps, a challenging place for the OP. There is little diversity here outside of a large latin community and wealthy persian kids at the local private university which could lead to easy alienation. However, Denver is a friendly place and I have found people very welcoming during my time here.
     
    Last edited: Oct 31, 2012
  2. Fraiche

    Fraiche Senior member

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    1,138
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    Location:
    SF
    Get yourself a gym membership.
    Get on bodybuilding.com, learn about lifting weights.
    Buy protein powder. Change your diet.
    Pump iron.
    Dedicate yourself for 3-6 months.

    Your life will change.
     
  3. amathew

    amathew Senior member

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    When I started lifting weight years ago, I thought that getting as big as an IFBB pro would get me the ladies....Never got that big, and ended up getting into powerlifting instead, but I've found that chicks don't really seem to care about how ripped a guy is.
     
  4. KingJulien

    KingJulien Senior member

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    Yeah man having friends is totally not a prerequisite for having a fulfilling relationship. When you get that lady and have no one else whatsoever to fall back on or occupy your time, you're not going to be needy and tank the relationship at all.


    Yeah except for a select few they totally don't really care, once you're 'in shape' it doesn't make much of a difference how much more ripped you get and can actually hurt your looks.
     
    1 person likes this.
  5. Gibonius

    Gibonius Senior member

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    Suburban Sprawl Sector 3, Maryland
    

    He says in his second post that he's in to powerlifting.

    A jacked guy with no social skills isn't going to pick up the ladies.
     
  6. mgm9128

    mgm9128 Senior member

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    Of course having friends is important. I am not disputing that. I just do not think it is helpful to advise the OP to focus much on trying to build relationships of any kind, at this point. It does little in way of addressing the reason he is without them in the first place. It is sort of like telling the blind to see.
     
  7. Gibonius

    Gibonius Senior member

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    There's a certain set of social skills that apply to everybody, men and women. Those skills are essential to moving on to the somewhat different skills of picking up women and managing relationships. You're not likely to figure out how to be successful with the ladies when you can't handle people in general.

    Certainly he could learn those social skills by socializing with women, but there's usually a lot more pressure and mental hangups when you're dealing with the opposite sex. Easier to start with guys, and it has the added bonus of making you happier, more interesting, and expanding your social network (which leads to more opportunities to meet women).
    He could use some real introspection time to accept what's causing his problems, but he isn't going to learn how to swim (socialize) by reading. He's gotta get wet at some point, and that means making some actual friends. Doing that with guys is probably easier.
    There's that too. People with friends are usually happier and more satisfied, and less likely to have stupid problems with relationships because of it.

    Sad to say, this is especially true if you're short. Napolean complex is easy to develop, the short jacked out of his mind guy risks looking like he's insecure/compensating.
     
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2012
  8. mgm9128

    mgm9128 Senior member

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    Introspection is what I was hinting at. Once he finds a way to make himself happy, he will find a way to make others, and all else will fall into place.
     
  9. amathew

    amathew Senior member

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    All in all, I'm pretty happy with my life. Sure, I wish I had a higher salary, owned a audi r8, etc., but I am happy in most everything except for the fact that I don't have any meaningful relationships with women. I'd say I'm even content with my height and physical disability.
     
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2012
  10. mgm9128

    mgm9128 Senior member

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    I suppose hapiness is not the right word. Fulfilled may be better. But true happiness comes from within. Not money, cars, dumbbells, or fine linen. You really have to find something inside yourself worth sharing with others, then I imagine you will open up and do quite well.
     
    1 person likes this.
  11. mordecai

    mordecai Senior member

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    I haven't read any of this thread. Is it worth it?
     
  12. edmorel

    edmorel Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    If you would enjoy a book on the lifestory of Connemara, GQGeek or Neo, then you will enjoy this threak.
     
  13. Matt

    Matt Senior member

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    those were the days.....almost makes me wish I was socially maladjusted just for the sake of empathy. Almost.
     
  14. Dear Leader

    Dear Leader Well-Known Member

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    Have you tried reading up PUA stuff online? I highly suggest it. A lot of people will be against it but it did help me a lot. It's not just about picking up different girls for sex. I find that reading stuff online helped me with dating. And for someone who needs instructions step by step, I think it will help you a lot.

    It does look like you're living a good life so that's a great start. Why not pick up a new hobby? Like... snowboarding/skiing during winter/canoeing, kayaking during the summer. I don't know if you do all these things already but just do something different and spontaneous.
     
  15. KingJulien

    KingJulien Senior member

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    ^ he's been told to get some hobbies like 800 times already he doesn't want to or it's too hard or something

    PUA shit isn't going to help the underlying problem
     
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2012
  16. Fraiche

    Fraiche Senior member

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    +1

    OP wants to magically become good looking and buffed and have women rain on him without doing any work.
     
  17. CalTex

    CalTex Senior member

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    Come on OP tell us you joined some type of organization, give us a sign.
     
  18. Find Finn

    Find Finn Senior member

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    No need just get a puppy, although the other things help.
     
  19. amathew

    amathew Senior member

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    Nope, haven't done anything. I did join an online dating site but haven't met anyone yet.
     
  20. deadly7

    deadly7 Senior member

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    Considering your profile probably says, "I like statistics and weight lift and have no friends and do nothing else for fun, but I'm really fucking awesome" I can't imagine why. Getting people to like you and meeting new people is not fucking rocket science, but you refuse to listen to anybody else.
     

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