Statement groom’s tuxedo in Los Angeles/SoCal

[TheLoudestFan]

I recently got engaged (hooray!), and a big part of what won this wonderful woman over to hitch up with me is my sense of humor and comfort in my own skin. I like to ham it up. I did standup comedy for a good little while, and I’m the guy signing up for too many songs at the karaoke bar.



Point is, she’s loving how much I’m participating in planning our wedding already, letting me put my own stamp on things and having strong opinions. And so, we’ve agreed that it would only be right for me to swing for the fences with my suit/tux.



That being said, my budget is limited-ish ($2.5K all-in or under), and my sense of style day-to-day is rather schlubby (though with a good appetite for bright or loud colors: almost exclusively concert graphic tees and jeans or shorts, with Rainbows or green suede sneakers with kitschy patterned crew socks).



Contradicting myself even further, I do love dressing up for occasions, and I did sell tailored clothing for a year at the old Macy’s men store in the Beverly Center, when I was just out of college. I barely knew what I was doing, but at the very least I can identify the easier details in a suit jacket like lapel styles or vents, I know to avoid polyester like the plague so that I don’t melt, and over the years I’ve built a couple of fun wedding outfits from suit separates and a good shirt/tie/pocket square combo.



What I don’t know very well are the finer details on suit patterns and fit. I have no strong sense of what I gravitate toward in a silhouette, so I struggle to internalize the advice I’ve found in other threads (this and this being my main jumping off points for this project). Fit was always a bare minimum kind of concern for me, always buying RTW as cheaply as possible (Calvin Klein clearance, macy’s brands Alfani and Bar III, thrifting, etc.), and getting minor alterations. But if you ask me to close my eyes and conjure my favorite look in suits, it’s Marcelo Mastroianni in 8 1/2 or La Dolce Vita. So I think that means I lean Italian?



I also can’t afford a first-time, lower-stakes commission from a MTM/bespoke tailor, so I do know I need to invest time and patience to get this as close to right as I can, under that constraint.



Anyway, here’s what little I actually do know about what I want to accomplish, with an 18-24 month time horizon for the big day (we’re prioritizing finding the perfect venue in our budget, before nailing down a specific date):



-Tuxedo, but a mid-century look at the oldest. Tails or the like (what is “the like?” Beats me!) would be a step too far, even for me.

-Green. Somewhere in the emerald green to forest green spectrum. It should be memorable to folks who don’t much care about this kind of thing. Open to unique fabrics (including patterned fabrics), but I’m a husky man in SoCal who sweats easily, so it’ll need to not be too heavy.

-Fun lining. I love a good distinct lining, so Tallia was a brand that had always caught my eye, back in my retail days (while usually being out of reach, financially).

-This is more vague, but it needs to evoke “party,” maybe even a tad “goofy,” without completely distracting from my lovely bride. Loud, and as fly as I can manage, yet not full-on tacky. I don’t know what threading that needle looks like, exactly.



That’s all I have concrete so far, and I’m assuming it’s just particular enough to mean I’m more in the MTM/bespoke realm. So I’m looking for places in LA/OC that can accommodate this admittedly limited vision, at my budget. Ideally, someone who’d have fun in collaborating and matching my energy to my vague sense of style.



From the thread I linked earlier, it sounds like High Society and Divij are both solid jumping off points to start exploring. Cutting Room Bespoke also caught my eye in my own searching, but I’ve got no sense on where folks here stand, with them.



Is Cutting Room a waste of my time? Any tailors who visit LA consistently that would be game for all this, while still being able to hold my hand well enough, that I should prioritize seeking out?



Also, is there an etiquette around starting this process too far in advance? Like, would a consultation this far out be considered a waste of their time?



Thanks!

 

[TheIronDandy]

First: congratulations! Both on getting married, and on providing so much context on your needs

I can't help you with where to get your tux, wrong part of the world for me. But here are some thoughts on material and details:

If you want black tie level of formality, but more fun, then a dinner jacket is probably the way to go. The classic is the velvet dinner jacket, but velvet and SoCal does not seem like a great combination - you'll either self-combust or drown in your own sweat (which, while a memorable party trick, is probably not the effect you want to have). Mohair, or a wool-mohair mix might be a good option for your jacket: mohair doesn't wear as warm, and it dyes very well so you have a lot of option for color. Combine that with a lighter weight black barathea for the tuxedo trousers. I would suggest you still go with a darker color for the jacket (bottle green is nice), and stick to black trousers. A bottle green mohair dinner jacket with black trousers says "party". A full-on green mohair suit says "the riddler". There's a cultural reference to mod style, but I don't know if most people today would pick up on that. I wouldn't get too crazy with the cut: if you're a larger guy, make sure they don't put you in anything too tight. Italian style has traditonally been rather slim, and unless you're a runway model, this just isn't a great look for most people. Not suggesting you go full military tailoring, but a bit of structure and a little shoulder padding makes most people look better.

Keep in mind that just wearing black tie is memorable, especially if people usually see you in graphic tees, so I suggest you don't get too carried away with "fun" details. I realise you are not a "classic menswear" guy, but a custom black tie rig is a big investment and you should make sure it will be useful for more than one event. "Fun" details are like jokes: they will be a whole lot less amusing the second time. That being said, go with what feels like you. We can all preach about what you "should" do, but in the end it's your moment. Make it yours!

 

[maxalex]

As a former art student (long ago and far away) I understand your gravitation to creative attire. I myself still wear many non-trad outfits, although I aim for elegant over wacky.

That said, you were on the right track when you mentioned not wanting to upstage your fiancée. The truth is that weddings are all about the bride (assuming a heterosexual couple). Nobody cares about the groom. Okay maybe his mom. A little. The groom is background filler. That’s it. So dress appropriately.

That means either a navy or charcoal business suit, a black or midnight blue tux or (as pointed out above) a white dinner jacket which would be the most eye-catching but acceptable look.

As a bonus, you will then have an outfit you can wear again and again. (The bride does not have that option.)

I realize this is not the advice you solicited. But keep in mind that you will have many opportunities, in our still male-dominated world, to be the center of attention. Give this one day to her.

I can’t recommend shops in LA, but note that the most important thing is fit. More than price, fabric, texture, color. Fit. Fit. Fit. Good luck. Don’t drink too much. Dance with her mom.

 

[TheLoudestFan]

As a former art student (long ago and far away) I understand your gravitation to creative attire. I myself still wear many non-trad outfits, although I aim for elegant over wacky.

That said, you were on the right track when you mentioned not wanting to upstage your fiancée. The truth is that weddings are all about the bride (assuming a heterosexual couple). Nobody cares about the groom. Okay maybe his mom. A little. The groom is background filler. That’s it. So dress appropriately.

That means either a navy or charcoal business suit, a black or midnight blue tux or (as pointed out above) a white dinner jacket which would be the most eye-catching but acceptable look.

As a bonus, you will then have an outfit you can wear again and again. (The bride does not have that option.)

I realize this is not the advice you solicited. But keep in mind that you will have many opportunities, in our still male-dominated world, to be the center of attention. Give this one day to her.

I can’t recommend shops in LA, but note that the most important thing is fit. More than price, fabric, texture, color. Fit. Fit. Fit. Good luck. Don’t drink too much. Dance with her mom.

I’m realizing now that with my lengthy intro, it might come across that my wants here were steamrolling what my fiancée envisions for her wedding. That couldn’t be further from the truth.

We’ve been together for 11 years already, so we have a pretty strong sense of what we love in one another, and how we want to go about celebrating that. I know you’re having to take this all on faith, with me mediating her perspective, but the groom being “background filler” is exactly the kind of traditionalism that we’d both bristle at. She is looking forward to how I will rise to the occasion and wow her, just as much as she is eager to wow me with her own dress, hair and makeup.

As for concerns about wearing my tux again, our approach to this partly comes from bristling at the gender norm of a groom getting more utility from his tux than the bride does from her dress. Something I can only get away with wearing once is closer to what we’re striving for, as frivolous or foolhardy as that sounds. Maybe this endeavor builds a great relationship with a tailor that I come back to for future suits and black tie getups, but for now, I’d probably go back to cheaper rentals for future occasions where I’m not co-star of the show.

Finally, I completely understand that fit is paramount. I’m just communicating that I don’t have a strong/trained enough eye for it, and that while I can understand individual components of it and see differences in side-by-side comparisons focusing on a given detail, incorporating all of them into a cohesive style and silhouette is levels above where I’m at. So picking a tailor by getting a sense of their house style is an overwhelming prospect, since I struggle seeing that forest through the trees. So, I’m more looking for advice on pitfalls to avoid (e.g. IronDandy’s material recommendations and their point on avoiding anything too tight), as well as recommendations for tailors who would be up to the task while also being patient enough to hold my hand through this.

 

[maxalex]

Ok I understand. You should of course both dress as you like, especially as you seem in agreement. Just keep in mind that regardless of how the two of you approach your wedding as co-stars, it’s likely most of your guests will see it as her day. That’s just the reality, or tradition if you will, of weddings in western culture. Not that you need to abide by that…