Someone farts in your face while walking past your seat. What do you do?

[merkur]

..

 

[ConcernedParent]

Predict what they last ate.

 

[DNW]

Throwdown.

 

[Jumbie]

In a loud voice ask, "OMG, did you just fart? It smells like something crawled up your ass and died!"

Do NOT lick your lips.

 

[TintoTerra]

On a related subject, I spent the day cursing the elderly people that had been through my workplace earlier because there was an 'elderly bowels' smell around periodically throughout the day. I had a realization, though, when I got home and smelled it again. Damn those week-old leftovers.

 

[DBowers]

Originally Posted by Jumbie

In a loud voice ask, "OMG, did you just fart? It smells like something crawled up your ass and died!"

Do NOT lick your lips.
Totally acceptable and expected response on a subway.

 

[mrkleen]

Get off the train and quickly get on the next car down the line. And as you walk past the offender, tell him "you ******* stink - douchebag"

 

[NakedYoga]

Look at his shoes.

 

[Tck13]

Light a match then proceed as follows:

Originally Posted by NakedYoga

Look at his shoes.
+1 Do this.

Originally Posted by DarkNWorn

Throwdown.
+1 Then start swinging.

 

[sho'nuff]

Breathe in deeply through your mouth and let those fart molecules infuse into your bloodstream , letting the fart molecules become basic building block for your cells and dna.

 

[AntiHero84]

Butt-punch

 

[calisanfran]

Faint

 

[edmorel]

determine whether he is a virgin or not by how loud the fart sounds. A tight a-hole will let out a low, squeaky fart. Anything louder than that denotes a rather open balloon knot. Maybe a stint in jail.

 

[bcx]

Begin plotting your elaborate revenge.

 

[Trompe le Monde]