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Serious fashion advice

dpatton75

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I didn't start this thread for dating advice (which I don't need) and there is more to this than me just trying to impress her.

I have to overhaul my entire wardrobe due to gaining about 1.5 inches in the waist and 1 inch in the neck. Its fine since most of my clothes are either outdated or well worn. I was able to have some of my more recent purchases retailored.

I work in a public sphere where I need to look presentable and professional.
 

Phileas Fogg

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I didn't start this thread for dating advice (which I don't need) and there is more to this than me just trying to impress her.

I have to overhaul my entire wardrobe due to gaining about 1.5 inches in the waist and 1 inch in the neck. Its fine since most of my clothes are either outdated or well worn. I was able to have some of my more recent purchases retailored.

I work in a public sphere where I need to look presentable and professional.
well, you started it off actually talking about a woman you wanted to date and how it was a really important date and how she is a very “serious” woman. Forgive us for taking that at face value.
 

rjc149

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I didn't start this thread for dating advice
… but you kind of did, no? You asked for advice on how to dress for a date with a serious 10/10-bodied woman in order to impress her and make yourself appear to be a viable sexual option for her. We don’t have to mince words, I’m a dude too.

But if you don’t care for the general dating and female attraction advice, we can focus on your clothing. Wearing a suit to a date— for the sole purpose of impressing your date— is ill advised and unnecessary. If you’re upgrading your professional wardrobe, that’s another thing, but that’s definitely not how you began this thread.

I would recommend a nice pair of slacks or chinos, some brown dress shoes or chukkas, a collared shirt, and maybe a sport coat. Or maybe a beige Harrrington jacket if sport coats aren’t your thing. I think that looks nice and it’s age-appropriate.

I also recommend losing the extra inches in the gym, rather than buying a new wardrobe to accommodate them. You’ll generally look more attractive to women by being in shape more than by dressing well. Once you’ve slimmed a bit, reward yourself with some nice new clothing that shows it off.
 

dpatton75

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well, you started it off actually talking about a woman you wanted to date and how it was a really important date and how she is a very “serious” woman. Forgive us for taking that at face value.
It is a fancy of her's to go to nice upscale restaurants that require formal dress. Since I needed new work clothes, I figured I will kill two birds with one stone.

She is from a different culture that places more value on formal dress when dating/dining (Italy to be exact).
 

dpatton75

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Since covid and since I last bought new dress clothes, styles and fashions have changed. That is what I was looking for help with.
 

rjc149

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It is a fancy of her's to go to nice upscale restaurants that require formal dress. ...

She is from a different culture that places more value on formal dress when dating/dining (Italy to be exact).
If this is what she's expecting from you before she puts out, she doesn't sound all that amazing. A woman who likes you for you will happily accompany you to a casual spot of your choosing, where you can have a few drinks and flirt and enjoy each other's company. I also think there's an underlying attitude where you feel like you need to fit into her frame and please her, which is subservient and will eventually turn her off. Just be careful. And that will be my final advice on this particular woman.

Dress styles have basically slimmed down, and have become more form-fitting. As long as your clothing fits you well and flatters your body, whether suits or whatnot, you'll look good. It’s never flattering or becoming for a middle-aged man to be following current trends. Go with a classic look.
 
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dieworkwear

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To the OP, if you're rebuilding your wardrobe and you're of average size, check out Spier & Mackay. They have many affordable things that can help you get started on this process. As you develop your taste, you can upgrade and/ or buy other things that fit your aesthetic direction.
 
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dieworkwear

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lol I wish I could have bet money you’d make this comment. You’re nothing if not predictable, Mr. Workwear.
Yea, I deleted my comment because I don't really want to have an argument about it. You do you.
 

rjc149

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Yea, I deleted my comment because I don't really want to have an argument about it. You do you.
I didn’t realize you had such antagonistic intent, because I didn’t see anything to constructively argue with you about, other than you repeating the tired platitude that dating advice is for PUA’s, which was fully anticipated and not something I took as an insult.
 

dieworkwear

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I didn’t realize you had such antagonistic intent, because I didn’t see anything to constructively argue with you about, other than you repeating the tired platitude that dating advice is for PUA’s, which was fully anticipated and not something I took as an insult.
My point wasn't that dating advice is PUA. Just that your specific dating advice feels very PUA.

But again, you do you.
 

Phileas Fogg

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I didn’t realize you had such antagonistic intent, because I didn’t see anything to constructively argue with you about, other than you repeating the tired platitude that dating advice is for PUA’s, which was fully anticipated and not something I took as an insult.
At least he didn’t compare him to a reject from a low tier shoe brand.
 

breakaway01

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Women are generally more attracted to higher-status men. Not every woman, and not always, but generally speaking. You see this play out everywhere, again and again, so I’m not going into the theory on that. Let’s just agree that it’s a self-evident truth about dating and attraction.
I think this is the crux of where we disagree actually, and not a self-evident truth. Do women tell you this?

Your attitude seems to be “she is above me, therefore I must impress her by going up to her level.” You were about to drop some serious coin on an outfit for this date — that means you are probably far more interested in her than she is in you, and your expectations on this date are too high.
Where did I say this? You must mean the OP.
My attitude would be, "I like this person, I want to look nice on a date to show that I am interested in her and I value her company". This does not require me to "fawn over" her.


No woman’s beauty places her value above yours.
Where did I say this? And if that's your motivation, good for you and I wish you happy relationships in the future.
 

rjc149

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My point wasn't that dating advice is PUA. Just that your specific dating advice feels very PUA.

But again, you do you.
Pickup artists employ manipulation tactics that mimic the behavior of confident men who behave attractively to women, so it’s understandable that “PUA” is a blanket term you, or anyone with a more feminist-leaning perspective on dating, employs to describe anything that advocates the authentic adoption of a confident mindset with women.
 

rjc149

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I think this is the crux of where we disagree actually, and not a self-evident truth. Do women tell you this?



Where did I say this? You must mean the OP.
My attitude would be, "I like this person, I want to look nice on a date to show that I am interested in her and I value her company". This does not require me to "fawn over" her.




Where did I say this? And if that's your motivation, good for you and I wish you happy relationships in the future.
I don’t believe I intended to respond to you on this thread (maybe unintentionally?) and I’m really, really not interested in a Loveshack.org battle between bitter middle aged feminists and misogynistic “red pillers.” You may freely disagree with anything I post, I won’t take it personally and I won’t hate you.
 

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