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Reasons (excuses) for growing a beard?

Discussion in 'Health & Body' started by Jerome, May 18, 2011.

  1. Jerome

    Jerome Senior member

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    I never grew a full beard but maybe once in a life a man should do it! I have- already since childhood- had the (IMO: correct!) notion that many men grow beards in order to hide their unseemly, flabby facial features. In my case I could motivate myself to such an act by reminding me of its manliness or the intimitating effects (Vikings, Nordic barbarians etc.) it could have. Maybe I'll do it starting from early fall...
     
  2. turboman808

    turboman808 Senior member

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    For about 4 months this winter I was just working my ass off. No dressing up at all and working alot with my hands. How I looked became very unimportant. By the end I had quite a Grizzly Adams thing going on. IMO not a very attractive look. HAHA

    Best part is I needed a new passport and got it taken before I got all cleaned up. It's pretty funny.


    Still not a good look at all. But I do like to keep some stubble. Looks masculine.
     
  3. Jerome

    Jerome Senior member

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    I always am shaving myself clean like a Roman, only when I'm sick- which hardly ever happens in recent years- do I at times leave a two- at most three-day-stubble...
     
  4. celery

    celery Senior member

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    Reasons to have a beard:

    1. You look good with a beard. (Some men look better with beards than without, that's a bonus if you're one of them)

    2. You're so incredibly lazy that you can't be bothered to shave. (If this were the case, I have a feeling that you wouldn't be on styleforum)

    3. Women think you look good with a beard. (Sometimes a guy is ugly and just doesn't know it and women find you more attractive with a beard)

    4. You're gay, but you don't want people to know. (Although, this is a different type of beard. Also, you may be a Republican Politician if this is the case)


    Reasons not to have a beard:

    1. You think you'll look manlier/tougher. (You won't)

    2. You have a crush on Gerard Butler from 300. (Sorry, you still won't look manly/tough, also, you won't have CGI muscles)

    3. To hide your unseemly flabby facial features. (You're still fat)

    4. You think you're a philosopher. (Read more than one book next year, also, you're still fat)

    5. You're so incredibly lazy that you can't be bothered to shave. (Don't let people know how lazy you are! Damn, shave that thing everyday; just do this one thing and you can trick people! Then, you can be lazy about everything else.)

    6. You ask, "Should I grow a beard?" (No, a man who deserves a beard wouldn't ask. Why do you think they're so manly and tough? Cause they asked permission or for advice from internet dress-up dolls?)

    7.

    8. Profit.













    P.S. Disregard everything I've said, I'm just saying stupid things. Do whatever you want.
     
  5. Jerome

    Jerome Senior member

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    Thanks! Some really excellent suggestions and excuses there, celery, although you sport some strange inverted logic at times. I esp. like dual-laziness, the philosopher-image*, or I could also go for the Monet/- painter or Marxist revolutionary one- 'fake it 'till you make it!!'...good for me that I'm neither too fat nor ugly but a very good arg. against it is the asking permission from internet dress-up dolls!, if I may be so bold to express my sympathy for your succinct assessment there. If not then I'll take it back of course.

    *what have books to do with philosophers?? real phil.s dont need books they only need to live according to their philosophy, or respectively be able to write truthfully about their lives- tertium non datur!

    Anyway, super post there>!
     
  6. celery

    celery Senior member

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    Well, logic is my strong suit. In fact, I usually wear it when I interview, with cap-toe oxfords of course.
     
  7. munchausen

    munchausen Senior member

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    I
    Reasons to have a beard:

    1. You look good with a beard. (Some men look better with beards than without, that's a bonus if you're one of them)

    2. You're so incredibly lazy that you can't be bothered to shave. (If this were the case, I have a feeling that you wouldn't be on styleforum)

    3. Women think you look good with a beard. (Sometimes a guy is ugly and just doesn't know it and women find you more attractive with a beard)

    4. You're gay, but you don't want people to know. (Although, this is a different type of beard. Also, you may be a Republican Politician if this is the case)


    Reasons not to have a beard:

    1. You think you'll look manlier/tougher. (You won't)

    2. You have a crush on Gerard Butler from 300. (Sorry, you still won't look manly/tough, also, you won't have CGI muscles)

    3. To hide your unseemly flabby facial features. (You're still fat)

    4. You think you're a philosopher. (Read more than one book needy year, also, you're still fat)

    5. You're so incredibly lazy that you can't be bothered to shave. (Don't let people know how lazy you are! Damn, shave that thing everyday; just do this one thing and you can trick people! Then, you can be lazy about everything else.)

    6. You ask, "Should I grow a beard?" (No, a man who deserves a beard wouldn't ask. Why do you think they're so manly and tough? Cause they asked permission or for advice from internet dress-up dolls?)

    7.

    8. Profit.













    P.S. Disregard everything I've said, I'm just saying stupid things. Do whatever you want.

    I agree with all of this
     
  8. StorGladStang

    StorGladStang New Member

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    I don't see a problem with asking for advice on beards, try growing one if you want to and if you don't like it you can just shave.

    Keep in mind that it itches like a motherfuck.
     
  9. alexanduh

    alexanduh Senior member

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    Sydney
    the reason to grow a beard is to keep the lower half of your face warm as you live on the north pole and must deliver presents to children all over the world once a year in an open top sleigh.[​IMG]
     
  10. Khayembii Communique

    Khayembii Communique Senior member

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    The question you will be asked most frequently is "Why are you growing it?"

    You don't really know why, of course, but that's not good enough. Surely your fertile mind is up to the challenge. Generally, offering a new answer every time the question is asked will keep you in high spirits.

    "Oh, it's for the centennial," will usually do. Never say which centennial.

    "I've become radicalized by the government's decision to (here fill in the latest harebrained decision by the government - there are several reported in the papers each morning)."

    Identity crises and masculinity problems are passe.

    Explanations having to do with laziness, boredom or thrift are acceptable, but health reasons are open to dispute. Although a beard protects you from insects, sunburn and cold, it is also true that even the cleanest beard harbors germs, both nasty and benign.
     
  11. roryben

    roryben Senior member

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    There was a study recently that concluded that men with beards are less trustworthy to the general public. So I grew a beard.
     
  12. celery

    celery Senior member

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    Earlier I mentioned that some guys look better with beards. I just remembered a perfect example:

    Rowan Atkinson isn't the best looking guy, but he's definitely a beard guy:

    Blackadder season1.
    [​IMG]

    Blackadder season2.
    [​IMG]


    Not in character, but also decades apart in age.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
  13. Jerome

    Jerome Senior member

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    I don't see a problem with asking for advice on beards, try growing one if you want to and if you don't like it you can just shave.

    Keep in mind that it itches like a motherfuck.


    There was a study recently that concluded that men with beards are less trustworthy to the general public. So I grew a beard.
    Good motivating posts there, guys!

    Khayembii: the few people who happen to know me, already think that I'm crazy anyway, but maybe growing a beard would be a sign to them that now I have gone over the edge for good...[​IMG]

    celery: I like that 'Elizabethean' beard there, actually. I certainly wouldn't want a moustaccio à la General Malchett but to be honest I actually think that the typical English-officers-beard as portrayed by Darling, Blackadder or Flashheart is worth considering!
     
  14. Blurv

    Blurv Well-Known Member

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    Grow a beard for all those men out there who can't.
     
  15. Jerome

    Jerome Senior member

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    Grow a beard for all those men out there who can't.
    .!.
     
  16. Smartalox

    Smartalox Senior member

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    Because you play for a hockey team that is still in the playoffs, of course!

    Also, a cousin of mine who is a rancher in Northern Canada grows his beard in winter to keep his face warm riding the range in the cold months. Another, older man in my family developed a skin condition late in life. He grew a beard to hide the scars.

    For what it's worth, the last time I grew a beard, it included a disturbing amount of grey hair!
     
  17. arvidg

    arvidg Senior member

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    Oslo, NO
    I can add one more reason to grow a beard:

    To protect your lower face from freezing rain. While cycling.

    The freezing rain forms an ice shield a couple of millimeters from your skin, insulating quite well.

    I know this from personal experience. I don't know if it's relevant for you.

    But in all seriousness: If you want to try a beard, grow a beard and see what happens. I had a beard for ten years (full beard, then goatee). Didn't make much of a difference except in freezing rain. (You may argue that I still have a beard. I kept the sideburns.)

    Oh, the time saved shaving will be spent trimming the beard. No net saving there.
     
  18. milosh

    milosh Senior member

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    I haven't shaved for about 6 months. I only trim my beard every 2-3 weeks. Three reasons:

    1) I like shaving but I am lazy and would rather spend my time doing something else(eg. reading SF)

    2) My current GF gets a turn on from it

    3) I think I look good
     
  19. HomerJ

    HomerJ Senior member

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    Someone explain the bald + beard/goatee phenomenon.
     
  20. FlyingLotus

    FlyingLotus Senior member

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    Someone explain the bald + beard/goatee phenomenon.


    I think it has to do with compensating for the bald part...

    I've been growing my beard for a few months now, it's patchy as he'll but I'm having fun with it. I don't really care right now if it looks ridiculous.
     

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