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Putting Off The Married Life

Discussion in 'Social Life, Food & Drink, Travel' started by SoleBajan, May 12, 2009.

  1. Rambo

    Rambo Senior member

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    I'M IN MIAMI, BITCH
  2. Tommy Trolley

    Tommy Trolley Active Member

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    Can't believe I've read all 19 pages. The last couple pages paid off, getting back to the original topic and less about prenups. Interesting takes on the subject of marriage here. It's no wonder the issue of same-sex unions is so talked about when we as a culture have lost the ability to hold a consistent definition of marriage and it's greater meaning and implications.

    As with many "traditions" the modern era has eliminated much of the old world necessity. Marrying, one of the most important events in a persons life historically has in so many ways become obsolete. Sex can be readily had, Illegitimacy is no longer as stigmatized, and a legal system is in place to protect parties in shared business transactions and civil disputes. The wedding day can seem like a vestige that we are close to shedding from our midst once and for all.

    Having said that, it is clear to me that the necessity of marriage is stronger than ever. You may dispute this, but you can't ignore the popularity of the institution when even gay people want in on it. But popular doesn't equal necessary.

    Now, why are we "putting off the married life" later or all-together? My contention is that it's good for the GDP and good for business, therefore good for America, at least in the short term. Therefore a concerted, if unconscious effort has been made to encourage us to avoid or forego getting hitched.

    How is it good for business? Lets say there are 100 million single people in America (age 18-80). If they all paired up and got married this month 50 million apartment, condo units, and houses would flood the market. In many cases, one spouse would leave the job market. Less singles means less business (over all) for nightclubs, restaurants, and much of the sundry leisure expenditures made by people seeking amusement, mates, or what-not. Less spent on fashion and cosmetics and image-based products because once married, a majority will forego some of the pursuits to attracting and maintaining the opposite sex. (not SF members, of course) And what happens to the decision to drop 2 grand on one suit when there is a future college fund to consider?

    That's not really where I wanted to go in this post, but it's where my thoughts led me. I don't think it's a conspiracy, but the fact that unmarried people consume far more goods and services than if they were paired up is why I suspect late-life marriages and high rates of divorce haven't raised an alarm for a full-out crisis. Why do we put off marriage? We are selfish. I am, or have been very selfish. Now I'm getting older, dating has become more of a chore, and I think I'm worse off because I'm not yet married.

    I F'ing hate that I'm still single at 37. You who are younger take heed. Marry a nice reliable girl who floats your boat. Don't be as picky and as demanding as some here come across as, don't listen to sitcom logic, and don't believe Hefner. Observe how truly pitiful he is. If Hef were anyone else, he wouldn't be Hef. Don't listen to that voice that says, "so many hot women I have yet to fuck." One is much like the rest and like a drug will leave you unsatisfied yet needing another score.

    And picture yourself in a doctors office awaiting the biopsy result. Who will be there for you when the worst happens? The girl who agreed to the prenup? She would rather cash in at a loss than weather the "for worse" when the "for better" has run out. If it's a choice between losing half my things and risking being alone at the end, just remember: you ain't taking it with you.

    And remember, if it starts to look like she was the wrong girl, she's probably thinking the same about you.

    Didn't plan on going there, either. But I did. Good night.
     
  3. Etienne

    Etienne Senior member

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    Lets say there are 100 million single people in America (age 18-80). If they all paired up and got married this month 50 million apartment, condo units, and houses would flood the market.
    Wow, you need to be married to live together in the US?
     
  4. longskate88

    longskate88 Senior member

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    ...I F'ing hate that I'm still single at 37. You who are younger take heed. Marry a nice reliable girl who floats your boat. Don't be as picky and as demanding as some here come across as, don't listen to sitcom logic, and don't believe Hefner. Observe how truly pitiful he is. If Hef were anyone else, he wouldn't be Hef. Don't listen to that voice that says, "so many hot women I have yet to fuck." One is much like the rest and like a drug will leave you unsatisfied yet needing another score. And picture yourself in a doctors office awaiting the biopsy result. Who will be there for you when the worst happens? The girl who agreed to the prenup? She would rather cash in at a loss than weather the "for worse" when the "for better" has run out. If it's a choice between losing half my things and risking being alone at the end, just remember: you ain't taking it with you. And remember, if it starts to look like she was the wrong girl, she's probably thinking the same about you. Didn't plan on going there, either. But I did. Good night.
    Thanks for taking the time. This made me think of the recent article on how the internet and world-wide connectivity has negatively impacted young people's ability to make decisions. With an infinite number of choices, we're having a hard time being satisfied with what we have. Secondly, I think our culture and advertising heavily pushes the "NEW!" "EXCITING!" product and encourages us to strive for bigger and better things (both material and non), which goes against your theory of finding someone adequate to settle down with. Men think they need/deserve a supermodel looking wife, since all the media portrays that. Women have been empowered to choose freely their mate and marriage traditions have relaxed as you said, so being single longer has lost some of it's stigma. I think your theory works in a small town setting, but in the interconnected fast-paced world, everyone's looking to trade-up a little more often, which makes "til death do us part" a little less comforting, and a little more restricting. GQ British did a great article on the Hefner pheonomenon, the final sentence was something to this effect: "While you sit their, stuffing your wrinkly face into the perky breasts of a stripper who's disgusted by your decrepitude of old age, a man you've never met, in a town you've never been to, is sitting down to some home-cooked lasagna and a Golden Girls re-run with your ex-wife."
     
  5. dkzzzz

    dkzzzz Senior member

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    You are making Vox seem subtle and humble at the same time, which takes some doing.

    Oh, Bitch please don't be jealaous of him just casue he has better wardrobe.
     
  6. dpatsil

    dpatsil Senior member

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    Some asked about the divorce rate. Taken from divorcerate.org

    The divorce rate in America for first marriage, vs second or third marriage
    50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce, according to Jennifer Baker of the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology in Springfield, Missouri."

    According to enrichment journal on the divorce rate in America:
    The divorce rate in America for first marriage is 41%
    The divorce rate in America for second marriage is 60%
    The divorce rate in America for third marriage is 73%


    The divorce rate in America for childless couples and couples with children
    According to discovery channel, couples with children have a slightly lower rate of divorce than childless couples.

    Sociologists believe that childlessness is also a common cause of divorce. The absence of children leads to loneliness and weariness and even in the United States, at least 66 per cent of all divorced couples are childless.

    Now continue to have at it.
     
  7. dkzzzz

    dkzzzz Senior member

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    Yea don't be rational about marriage be subliminally religious and emotional like Ed.

    Marriage in US is financial suicide.
    Marriage in general is also death of sex.
    Children are end of your personal life and peace.

    I would provide tax benefits for people who decide not to have children of their own or adopt orphans.
    I also would incentify abortions.

    But of course society needs working ants thus it incentifies and glorifies act of procreation.

    BTW, marriage and monogamy r myths forced on humans.
     
  8. TylerTheToaster

    TylerTheToaster Member

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    Apr 16, 2009
    Really interesting article. The older I get the less energy I have for bullshit from girls. Sure its irritating to look around and see practically every friend of mine in a relationship but man it seems like all the girls are the same.

    My new classification system for women is that they're are all crazy, its the crazy crazy one's you have to watch out for.
     

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