First off, don't coordinate with your fiancee's dress. It never looks remotely good. You wear something classic and in good taste that frames her--she is the main event. No one is going to mistake who is the groom. For black tie, take a look at www.blacktieguide.com. If not a tux, a solid navy or charcoal (I prefer navy) suit with black oxford shoes, a white shirt, and a weddinng (black/white or silver) tie.