New to suits and would like a second opinion.

[staxringold]

The first bar mitzvah I was invited to in middle school the invitation said "black tie". Turns out the kid told everybody at school that that wasn't actually true but me and one other kid (who didn't get the memo) showed up in tuxes and looked like doofuses.

 

[Quadcammer]



If you want to talk about intelligence, the intelligence required to deal with this situations is first of all the social intelligence needed to realise that it is the host of any event whose view counts. So the first thing that anyone should do when receiving an invitation whose instructions one cannot be certain of, is to confirm with the host what they mean. The one thing you don't do is assume that 'formal' means what you think it does and turn up in black (or indeed, white) tie when everyone else is just wearing a lounge suit - or vice-versa. You can insist that everyone else is a moron apart from you all you like, but you'll soon find that the numbers of invitations you receive might start to become disappointingly few. 

quite frankly, I'd rather not attend events from hosts who cannot understand the meaning of formal.

 

[Superfluous]



awesome, except that most people with even a few operating braincells understand the meaning of formal, and realize that is more formal than semi-formal or black tie optional.
So, if the person who sent the invite is a moron, perhaps a suit is ok. If he/she is not a moron, plan on black tie.

I got a wedding invite that is "fairly formal," and they described it as men wearing suits....

 

[Quadcammer]



I got a wedding invite that is "fairly formal," and they described it as men wearing suits....

precisely.

fairly formal /= formal

 

[Superfluous]



precisely.
fairly formal /= formal

I'd say "fairly" is close to the term "moderately." "Moderately formal" would be a form of formal, right? I'm just saying that people have different understandings of formality.

 

[gambit50]

Greetings!

As you can see I am new to these forums but have been stalking them for the past few weeks as I attempt to build a adequate wardrobe for the business world.

Withing two weeks I will be attending a formal event in which I would like to look great with the suit I have purchased. I need a second opinion since I am still very new and have yet to build a sense of "style"

I will be wearing a navy blue pinstripe suit very similar to the colors in the image below. I don't have an image of the actual suit since a tailor is making some alterations. If anything the suit I have is a bit darker than the one shown in the image.




The shirt I will be wearing, please excuse the poor image quality and money mess.



The shoes




Shoes are a very dark Navy Blue made from Ostrich leather. I liked them when I saw them

I will be taking a picture when I have everything on since I am aware it's a bit difficult to see if it all fits together with just images.

Thanks!

Yes, you do need a lot of help. That shirt is awful and you don't even deserve to return the shoes, they should just be burnt.(Would that be fake animal cruelty?)
Unless you are a pimp which would explain the random paper lying around your photo.
But in that case, those shoes would place you on a low rung of the pimp ladder and the bills would, too. They should be 50s and 100s.
The pinstripe suit is not the worst thing and if it is darker that is better.
In short, listen to everyone else above me.

quite frankly, I'd rather not attend events from hosts who cannot understand the meaning of formal.

While my snobbery commiserates with you and it would be nice if the world had standard meanings and definitions so that every utterance was not the random intention of whomever at that moment(communication breaks down because of this) and that I could buy a pair of sneakers in the same size no matter the maker, I have to agree with FlyingMonkey in this case due to practicality. 'Most' people is a very large number and I can assure you they do not know the meanings or follow protocols as you do.
Looking at the OP, do you really think this is going to be black tie?
I do not.
And I am quite sure you will never be on the list for this person's events so don't worry about that.
I hope you are relieved.
But in case you are, I expect pics of the fab bespoke dyed croc skin kicks you will be wearing to the event.

 

[staxringold]

I actually like the tie. But yeah, the shirt is pretty bad. And I know nothing about shoes.

 

[GBR]

Burn the shoes - they are not suitable for anything. The tie is questionable. Pin stripe suits at a wedding are not ideal but if it is the only one you have few will notice and less care.

 

[Superfluous]



Burn the shoes - they are not suitable for anything. The tie is questionable. Pin stripe suits at a wedding are not ideal but if it is the only one you have few will notice and less care.

What about Halloween? It is coming up.

 

[jeff13007]



quite frankly, I'd rather not attend events from hosts who cannot understand the meaning of formal.

Ill keep that in mind next time i get an invite from pretty much everyone i know besides the older generation lol. But back to topic on dress codes during my sisters wedding we had to change the dress code from "Formal" to "Black Tie" because in today's world its become pretty common to associate "Formal" with what we here on SF consider "Business attire". But then again if we are going by strict dress codes then Formal would be White tie, and semi formal meaning black tie.....

 

[Singlemalt]

um, what? formal attire is formal attire. suits are not formal attire. this is not really up for discussion

Nope. Sorry. What isn't up to discussion is what the majority view formal as. And unfortunately, it's a suit. Formal for the majority is not black tie/white tie/tux/no watch (because a gentlemen doesn't count the time at events like these, no?)/etc, it's...a simple suit, with a tie of course.

But I understand you, truly, I do. You're the guy in the pic below:



And you're facing an uphill battle. Kudos to you though.

....

Good thing you got a defined dress criteria for your sister's wedding, Jeff.

 

[Duplici Fertili]

What kind of formal event is it? What part of the world is it taking place?
Can't say anything about the suit since you don't have it yet. I hope it does not look shape like the one in the pic.
Return the shoes and get a pair of plain oxford.
Return both the shirt and tie. Get a white or blue shirt and a dark hue solid color tie in black, charcoal, or navy.

I will be returning the shirt and will most likely be getting a blue one but I might just go with white to be on the safe side.

As for the shoes I will be returning them as well. I agree some plain oxfords are my best bet especially since I am just starting out.

I will have to work with the suit so any more suggestions on improving this outfit? I will upload a picture of the suit itself tomorrow. In hopes to settle the completely off-topic debate it is semi-formal so the blame comes down to me for not clarifying. Sorry guys!

 

[Duplici Fertili]

Yes, you do need a lot of help. That shirt is awful and you don't even deserve to return the shoes, they should just be burnt.(Would that be fake animal cruelty?)
Unless you are a pimp which would explain the random paper lying around your photo.
But in that case, those shoes would place you on a low rung of the pimp ladder and the bills would, too. They should be 50s and 100s.
The pinstripe suit is not the worst thing and if it is darker that is better.
In short, listen to everyone else above me.
While my snobbery commiserates with you and it would be nice if the world had standard meanings and definitions so that every utterance was not the random intention of whomever at that moment(communication breaks down because of this) and that I could buy a pair of sneakers in the same size no matter the maker, I have to agree with FlyingMonkey in this case due to practicality. 'Most' people is a very large number and I can assure you they do not know the meanings or follow protocols as you do.
Looking at the OP, do you really think this is going to be black tie?
I do not.
And I am quite sure you will never be on the list for this person's events so don't worry about that.
I hope you are relieved.
But in case you are, I expect pics of the fab bespoke dyed croc skin kicks you will be wearing to the event.

Please excuse the pictures. One of my first stops was at one of my retail stores in the entire back part it was the the cleanest bit. Poor pair of employees but it seems that I am too busy trying to figure out this suit mess to change them.

 

[dreamspace]

The vast,vast majority of people today know "Formal" as suit and tie.
If they mean Tux, they either write "smoking/tuxedo" or "black tie". And even then, the later can also just mean "Dark suit and black tie or bowtie", I've experienced this countless times. Even showed up in Tux to a "Black tie"...turned out to be the only one in a Tux that night.

 

[Jermyn]

When exchanging the shirt, remember that more pale = more formal.
Go for a very light blue shirt and pair this with a light grey/ silver tie.

Also, don't forget to wear a white, linen pocket square.

This along with your black oxfords (an matching black belt), will result in you being appropriately attired for a non-black tie wedding.