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[Need Advice!] girl problems....

Discussion in 'Social Life, Food & Drink, Travel' started by dontbam, Aug 10, 2006.

  1. dontbam

    dontbam Member

    Messages:
    9
    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2006
    Well lets see here.. theres this one girl whos very good looking (in fact is a cheerleader) that I have been quite attracted to.. i talk to her now and then but never really got to know her.... I bumped into her one day and we decided to go eat lunch.. I found out that she knew more about me than I thought and found out that she visits my internet blog quite often (i dont write on it much though) and remembers a lot about me.. i was quite surprised

    Anyways, few weeks later, i decided to ask her out to a dinner/movie.. and she was very eager to go skipping out clubbin that night... we hit it off quite well at dinner and at the movies... after the movie, she didnt want the night to end and wanted to watch another movie. It was already to late so instead we went to a bar and had some fun. afterwards she wanted to do something so we decided to go back to my place. We chilled in the living room talkin/watchin tv until we finally went to my room to sleep. I kinda liked this girl so we didnt end up having sex, but just a lot of making out/cuddling/foreplay...

    I decided to invite her to go to a fair two days later.. she was thrilled and wanted to go... but in the morning at the last minute, she told me some important family thing came up and she couldnt go and was very sorry... I told her it was ok... she later messaged me a few more times tellin me how much she wanted to go and was sorry. I believed that she didnt really stand me up and that she really had something important so It didnt bother me much.

    The next few days were kinda weird.. we still talked normally but she seemed very depressed and very sleep-deprived. I asked her to go eat lunch/get some coffee but she couldn't since she had to study for an exam.. so again i still didnt really care much.

    Few days later, I was going to go to a bar, and she told me she was gonna go to the same bar with some friends and wanted to see me there. So I went, but when I got there, i see her with a group of guys flirting her ass off and drinking every shot that the guys offered her. We did talk, but she was throughly drunk.. not very fun.

    I asked her out on friday, but she turned me down cause she wanted to go to a party with some friends. She got trashed that night. So trashed she didnt go clubbin with me and some friends the next day.

    It was starting to bother me but I shrugged it off and asked her to go out on the sunday. I got no response whatsoever... however, the next morning, she calls me and tells me that her phone was cut off cause of not payin the bills and apologized like crazy.

    And later that week, turns down goin out for coffee to hang out with some friends and turns down lunch for a "job interview"......

    I am frustrated now. Is this girl a psycho and should i just ditch her and leave? or should i continue and im just at the wrong place at the wrong time?

    P.S. past history of her includes her boyfriend cheating on her

    - Mark
     
  2. Nantucket Red

    Nantucket Red Senior member

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    If you ditch her and leave, she might wise up.

    She sounds out of control. I personally couldn't be attracted to a girl who's habitually trashed.
     
  3. Aristocrat

    Aristocrat Senior member

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    Where abstract become reality
    Try to say that you wants to leave her if she don't try to be with you and stuffs like that, and if she don't say that she likes you are what so ever, than you should see the fact that she's a hmm [​IMG]
     
  4. chrysalid

    chrysalid Senior member

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  5. mrpologuy

    mrpologuy Senior member

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    I would make plans with her and then cancel about an hour before. I have done this before and it drives lots of women crazy. They show more interest after you do something like that. Try it and let me know how it works.
     
  6. mizanation

    mizanation Senior member

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    give me her number, i'll try to talk some sense into her.
     
  7. Earthmover

    Earthmover Senior member

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    Upper West Side
    Just stop calling her or whatever, and two weeks later, just run into her again. She seems like the type to enjoy that sort of roundabout dance.
     
  8. GQgeek

    GQgeek Senior member

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    Ya, I agree with earthmover. It seems like you're trying too hard to make it happen at this point. Don't even call her for a while and just run in to her again. Do something spur of the moment. This chick obviously isn't a planner.

    Plus, the behavior you're seeing might be due to a recent break-up. Girls act stupid after long-term relationships come to an end. She might just be confused. Either way, you shouldn't get too attached to her.
     
  9. Soph

    Soph Senior member

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    Bologna, Italy
    Use a hammer

    or

    Start picking up other girls right away and tell her you have another date, and say "It doesn't get better than me, you'll be sorry and be back and I'll be gone"
    Actually the second line sounds cocky, but it works - true true. Confidence in one's own market value with women is great. Women want to compete, especially the hot girls.
     
  10. lawyerdad

    lawyerdad Senior member

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    Ya, I agree with earthmover. It seems like you're trying too hard to make it happen at this point. Don't even call her for a while and just run in to her again. Do something spur of the moment. This chick obviously isn't a planner.

    Plus, the behavior you're seeing might be due to a recent break-up. Girls act stupid after long-term relationships come to an end. She might just be confused. Either way, you shouldn't get too attached to her.

    Or she could just be stupid, period. +1 on everyone else's advice. Devote your time and energy elsewhere. If she decides she misses your attention and wants to get it back, you can decide then whether it's worthwhile.
     
  11. Joffrey

    Joffrey Senior member

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    stop calling her. Next time she says she wants to go out be non-commital and dont go. Play it like that a few times, then meet up with her (no dates, just at some bar or party or whatever) and be aloof and make her pursue you. Now if she's truly interested she'll keep trying, if she's just looking for some fun then she'll try until you two sleep together (afterwards continue to be distant) or she'll lose interest and go after the next guy.

    That's how honeys our age like to play it
     
  12. imageWIS

    imageWIS Senior member

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    stop calling her. Next time she says she wants to go out be non-commital and dont go. Play it like that a few times, then meet up with her (no dates, just at some bar or party or whatever) and be aloof and make her pursue you. Now if she's truly interested she'll keep trying, if she's just looking for some fun then she'll try until you two sleep together (afterwards continue to be distant) or she'll lose interest and go after the next guy.

    That's how honeys our age like to play it


    Yeah...and they are fucking retards. Sorry if this offends anyone, but chicks our age (I'm 23, you guys are a bit younger...but not by much) are morons. I don't mean in an intellectually sort of way, I mean when it comes to relationships. They just can't seem to hold one together, it's all a game of smoke and mirrors. If they like a person, they should go out with them, if not they end up losing them; seriously, their attitude is insanely masochistic.

    Sorry, rant over.

    Jon.
     
  13. dontbam

    dontbam Member

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    Aug 10, 2006
    Thanks for the helpful replies.

    She called me last night and told me that she was sorry for bailin out on my because its been a hectic week for her and she invited me to go out and eat lunch with her sometime next week.

    I just told her that shes always too busy and if she really would do what she says, so I will just think about it and get back to her later.

    that should be ok right?
     
  14. imageWIS

    imageWIS Senior member

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    New York City / Buenos Aires
    Thanks for the helpful replies.

    She called me last night and told me that she was sorry for bailin out on my because its been a hectic week for her and she invited me to go out and eat lunch with her sometime next week.

    I just told her that shes always too busy and if she really would do what she says, so I will just think about it and get back to her later.

    that should be ok right?


    Probably not. Even though it was the truth, it was too direct, IMHO. You should have played it cool like you were so busy that you didn't notice she blew you off.

    Jon.
     
  15. rdawson808

    rdawson808 Senior member

    Messages:
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    Location:
    The Capital
    Thanks for the helpful replies.

    She called me last night and told me that she was sorry for bailin out on me...


    Get used to hearing that. I tried to date a woman like this too and it was utter frustration the entire time. I finally got so mad at her I told her that she was quite possibly the rudest person I had ever met and that she could go to hell. I didn't need to get laid that badly. Hell, I didn't need a date that badly.

    In the end I lost a really hard to find import CD that I had lent to her. It was worth the cost to get away from her.

    Do not call her. Stop pursuing her. You've committed yourself too much as it is--she knows if she calls you will respond. You're the dog, she's Pavlov. Move on to someone new.


    b
     
  16. dontbam

    dontbam Member

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    Aug 10, 2006
    hmm, well I know a couple of friends who have tried to go after her and all have told me that she likes to lead guys on and play mind games with them... however none of them have gotten as far as I have from just my first date with her, not to sound cocky..

    ive been suggested by them to just try and have sex with her and then ditch her, or just ditch her completely... itd be a shame though because me and her had a lot in common and i really did think she was a good girl to be with when i talked to her... but she could be playin mind games with me too

    and if thats the case, its still a shame because i could have tapped it on the first night and would have been done with all this already
     
  17. imageWIS

    imageWIS Senior member

    Messages:
    20,008
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    Apr 19, 2004
    Location:
    New York City / Buenos Aires
    hmm, well I know a couple of friends who have tried to go after her and all have told me that she likes to lead guys on and play mind games with them... however none of them have gotten as far as I have from just my first date with her, not to sound cocky..

    ive been suggested by them to just try and have sex with her and then ditch her, or just ditch her completely... itd be a shame though because me and her had a lot in common and i really did think she was a good girl to be with when i talked to her... but she could be playin mind games with me too

    and if thats the case, its still a shame because i could have tapped it on the first night and would have been done with all this already


    Surely there are other girls that look just as good that you could sleep with...

    Jon.
     
  18. dontbam

    dontbam Member

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    Surely there are other girls that look just as good that you could sleep with...

    Jon.


    yea.. but thats the problem in the first place. Im not looking for someone to just sleep with and pull a one-nighter, im lookin for someone to really connect with and be in a happy relationship with..

    i havent had so much in common wit a girl before as i had wit her so its tough when all the signs point to danger
     
  19. Britalian

    Britalian Senior member

    Messages:
    2,652
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    Jul 2, 2006
    Location:
    Italy.
    hmm, well I know a couple of friends who have tried to go after her and all have told me that she likes to lead guys on and play mind games with them... however none of them have gotten as far as I have from just my first date with her, not to sound cocky..

    ive been suggested by them to just try and have sex with her and then ditch her, or just ditch her completely... itd be a shame though because me and her had a lot in common and i really did think she was a good girl to be with when i talked to her... but she could be playin mind games with me too

    and if thats the case, its still a shame because i could have tapped it on the first night and would have been done with all this already


    it's a game.
    see - www.fastseduction.com and attendent links.
     
  20. shellshock

    shellshock Senior member

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    1,125
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    Los Angeles
    Yeah...and they are fucking retards. Sorry if this offends anyone, but chicks our age (I'm 23, you guys are a bit younger...but not by much) are morons. I don't mean in an intellectually sort of way, I mean when it comes to relationships. They just can't seem to hold one together, it's all a game of smoke and mirrors. If they like a person, they should go out with them, if not they end up losing them; seriously, their attitude is insanely masochistic.

    Sorry, rant over.

    Jon.



    wow. who the hell have YOU been dating?
     

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