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My bacon guilt...

BrettChaotix

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I always told myself I'd never buy bacon at home because it's a dangerous combination of heart-attack and deliciousness.... I broke my rule last weekend because I had friends in town and wanted to cook a big breakfast but then that kinda fell through and I was stuck with about 1/2lb of turkey bacon (50% less fat) and 1/2lb of traditional bacon in the fridge.

I didn't want it to spoil and I knew that if I froze it I would forget about it and it would get freezer burn and ruined so last night I said fuck it - let's rock and roll - so I decided to cook it all at once. What proceeded can be described as no less than an orgy of bacon. I wasn't counting but it must have been a half dozen frying pan loads worth of bacon... I ate it as I cooked more and then took most of what was left and made a massive triple-decker bacon, turkey and cheese sandwich... and finally had to throw out the remaining few pieces.

Looking back at it this morning, in the throws of heartburn and guilt, I still have to appreciate how tasty that sandwich was! If I wasn't so damn skinny I'd feel like a fat ass pig but rather than gain weight I think I just shaved a couple of weeks off of my life. Never again!!
 

lee_44106

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Bacon is just FRIGGIn awesome.

My heart cannot handle a pound of all that deliciousness, but I do indulge once in a while.
 

spertia

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When I first clicked on this thread, I thought it said "bacon QUILT." Was looking forward to a great photo....
 

dcg

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Originally Posted by spertia
When I first clicked on this thread, I thought it said "bacon QUILT." Was looking forward to a great photo....

++. When it's underlined on the main page you can't really tell the difference between "g" and "q".
 

Seanallen

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Originally Posted by spertia
When I first clicked on this thread, I thought it said "bacon QUILT." Was looking forward to a great photo....

 

Alter

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Originally Posted by BrettChaotix
I always told myself I'd never buy bacon at home because it's a dangerous combination of heart-attack and deliciousness.... I broke my rule last weekend because I had friends in town and wanted to cook a big breakfast but then that kinda fell through and I was stuck with about 1/2lb of turkey bacon (50% less fat) and 1/2lb of traditional bacon in the fridge.

I didn't want it to spoil and I knew that if I froze it I would forget about it and it would get freezer burn and ruined so last night I said fuck it - let's rock and roll - so I decided to cook it all at once. What proceeded can be described as no less than an orgy of bacon. I wasn't counting but it must have been a half dozen frying pan loads worth of bacon... I ate it as I cooked more and then took most of what was left and made a massive triple-decker bacon, turkey and cheese sandwich... and finally had to throw out the remaining few pieces.

Looking back at it this morning, in the throws of heartburn and guilt, I still have to appreciate how tasty that sandwich was! If I wasn't so damn skinny I'd feel like a fat ass pig but rather than gain weight I think I just shaved a couple of weeks off of my life. Never again!!


This reads like a letter to Penthouse Forum.
 

kwilkinson

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I thought it said Bacon Quilt also, and I almost got a chubby just thinking about it.
 

Spatlese

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Add me to the list of those who can't read and thought, just as the AIDS quilt did starting in 1987 to raise awareness and hope, the bacon quilt in 2009 was gonna start another revolution of porcine goodness.....
 

BDC2823

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Originally Posted by spertia
When I first clicked on this thread, I thought it said "bacon QUILT." Was looking forward to a great photo....

Hahahaha I thought the same exact thing.
 

johnny_flapjack

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I was watching Alton Brown cook up some bacon the other day and he put it on a wire rack on a cookie sheet, put it in a cold oven set to 400 and let it go for 15 or 20 minutes. I tried it and it worked well - bacon stays flat, fat drips off (rendering it totally cholesterol-less, no grease splatter.

And I rarely have guilt after eating a whole lot of bacon. Or sausage for that matter.
 

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